victory_road | Twelfth Transmutation | [video, backdated to 9/4] Don't be a Gary

[Seems like Pokemon videos are in vogue lately--when the feed from Alphonse's Gear opens it's an oddly-colored Pawniard that's peering into the camera. She leans back, blinks, and looks up to someone off-screen before nodding and turning it around to show two young men scuffling several feet away on the ground.]

Get off of me already!

No! You had this coming and you know--OW!!

Fuck off, Elric, you're the one always whining about playing by the rules!

You're the one cheating, you asshole! You don't challenge people fresh off the road when your team is completely healed up!

The hell I can't!

[There's a soft sigh from off-camera, and the Pawniard turns the camera around again to make a confused face.]

Is...this normal? Trainer never acted like this before...um, Chimera said to ask if someone can come stop them, please?

[Suddenly Alphonse and Envy's shouting ratches up another few notches, and a large sigh can be heard before a Tyranitar starts stepping forward. A Luxray huffs out a snort and adds his own two cents.]

I don't think that's gonna be neccessary NOW.

You fucking--what, hey, what's--?!

Chimera! What are you doing, put us down!

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Well...

That's one way to solve the problem. Good work, green guy.

[It's clearly a little while later when Al responds, looking very clearly grumpy and sporting a few nasty bruises.]

I hope you mean the Tyranitar and not the stupid palm tree.

Are you all right?

[Because that's slightly more of a concern than asking about 'what palm tree'.]

But yeah, that's. What I meant.

Yeah, I'm fine. A little sore, but fine.

[Al sighs and glares off-screen for a moment, scowling to hide his embarrassment.]

For the record, Envy totally earned that. Ambushing me for a battle before I could even get into town...I've been on the road for over a week going through that cave, I ran out of Potions two days ago! And he's been able to heal up at the Center!

[Now there's a shout from offscreen.]

I just got finished traveling through that same cave too!

You're just a sore loser! Before you'd even lost!

[Is this really happening here. Is he really hearing this.]

You guys have quite the rivalry going. Maybe you need to agree on some rules here, before things get too out of hand.

[Why does he always feel like he has to be the Adult.]

Shut up, Envy! You had a whole day to recover!

[MUMBLE GRUMBLE GRUMBLE]

[Al lets out a gusty sigh, and turns back to the camera with a very tired look.]

I already tried to. It took Heather going along for him to not fly on ahead of me and get every badge before I could even get to the cities.

What?!

You just made that up right now! The only thing you ever said was that you bet you'd beat me!

[UGH AL]

That was the first thing we agreed on!!

[jfc children.]

Look.

I'm aware I don't know either of you very well, but even I can see you arguing back and forth won't accomplish anything. If beating each other is that important to you, agree on the rules.

[He really can't help the Dad Voice. It's instinct at this point.]

[Al actually jumps a little and looks...startled? He wasn't expecting a scolding like that, definitely.]

I just want him to play fair, he's the one that wants to win no matter what!

Then the both of you need some kind of neutral party to make rules for you. That you both agree to.

Or neither of you wins.

[Sorry, Al. This is literally like breathing to him anymore.]

[Al frowns, but he's not actually opposed to the idea--he was the one that wanted to keep Envy from cheating in the first place.]

Heather was supposed to be keeping Envy fair, but she had to leave a few days ago because of an emergency. [Which is as far as he's getting into whatever Henry's problem is in public.] I'm fine with setting rules, he's the one that's being a big baby about it.

Heather... the blonde girl? With the big tiger-striped dog? Is she all right?

[They've only talked a handful of times, but that apparently means Heather Mason is firmly in the 'worry about' category.]

Why is he 'being a big baby'? Doesn't want to follow them?

Huh? Oh, she's fine, it's just...uh. Family troubles.

[She and Henry are basically siblings, right? Right.]

He's used to fighting dirty and not giving anyone a fair chance.

['Family troubles' could literally mean anything, which... doesn't ease his mind. But at the same time, it also says it's none of his business.]

All right. But I hope things start looking up.

Then he should learn some restraint if he wants to really claim a victory. Doing it any other way isn't a real win.

[Envy, over at the counter getting an ice pack, finally returns.]

Oh yeah, I'm the one who's a sore loser who fights dirty and needs restraint. Definitely.

[...well he is. BUT ALSO:]

Because when I get challenged to something I'll lose, I just walk right up and wordlessly punch the challenger in the eye instead of just telling them to fuck off. Besides, last time you challenged me after I'd left my good team with the nurses already!

[Sorry bruh, this is legitimately the most Disappointed Dad expression there ever was on Earth.]

You sure seem like it.

All I'm saying is you both need to settle these things before you let it get out of hand.

Then you should have thought of that before picking a fight with me right away!

[No comment on the subject of sucker-punches, of course.]

It's not like I'm trying to pick fights with him!

Both of you.

Figure this out. No more sucker-punches or picking fights, that way.

Twelfth Transmutation | [video, backdated to 9/4] Don't be a Gary

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