Dirk blinks, once. He's not as incredulous as he wishes he was, but he's just barely hanging onto his patience for this bullshit right about now.
While his expression doesn't change an iota, his voice pitches down slightly in irritation.
"....of course Santa is 'real' here," he mutters less to Akane than to the narrative void. "Of course that's a fuckin' thing."
He doesn't need to ask to know that this is the explanation for the dozens of shiny Obstagoon.
They're Santa's Obstagoon.
"Yeah, just slow your roll, maybe miss on purpose once in a while. Leave a few guys standing so that the rest of us can make some bank and get the hell out of here with something to show for it." He raises his voice back up to a more audible volume. But he's nothing if not helpful, offering her a strategy to look like she's actually trying. You know, if it matters that much to her.
"But anyone a lower rank than me is a Santa. A 'fake' Santa," he clarifies, still keeping it brisk. "Which is mostly everyone except Carly and a guy called Steven. If you're looking for someone specific, you're looking for fat people in jolly red and white suits, fighting housewives over the integrity of their winter blowout sales."
no subject
While his expression doesn't change an iota, his voice pitches down slightly in irritation.
"....of course Santa is 'real' here," he mutters less to Akane than to the narrative void. "Of course that's a fuckin' thing."
He doesn't need to ask to know that this is the explanation for the dozens of shiny Obstagoon.
They're Santa's Obstagoon.
"Yeah, just slow your roll, maybe miss on purpose once in a while. Leave a few guys standing so that the rest of us can make some bank and get the hell out of here with something to show for it." He raises his voice back up to a more audible volume. But he's nothing if not helpful, offering her a strategy to look like she's actually trying. You know, if it matters that much to her.
"But anyone a lower rank than me is a Santa. A 'fake' Santa," he clarifies, still keeping it brisk. "Which is mostly everyone except Carly and a guy called Steven. If you're looking for someone specific, you're looking for fat people in jolly red and white suits, fighting housewives over the integrity of their winter blowout sales."