[Would it really be Dave's hypothetically sad face that would be unbearable, or would it be missing out on the smile that slips across it now, warm and self-consciously delighted and kind of goofy?]

Okay. I guess I can swear on my honor or whatever. No more selfie-fives for Dave, woe and lack-a-day.

[And the smile shifts just a little into a wider grin, all smug around the edges like the Purrloin that caught the Pidgey. Dave leans back on his arms, greatly pleased with himself and everything this endeavor has shaped up to be.]

Ergo, that was a yes, no takebacks. Also you didn't say I couldn't fistpound myself or any other halfway masturbatory self-celebration, hahahaha, you fucked up.

[ B))))))))

Shades and shit-eating for everyone.]