victory_road | Open party log, as promised!

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Open party log, as promised!

Who: Fiddleford McGucket and anyone in Goldenrod who saw his post -- or hears the ruckus.
Where: The junkyard behind the Goldenrod magnet train station.
When: February 13th!
Summary: A WILD BIRTHDAY HOOTENANNY.
Rating: Moonshine.
Notes: Feel free to treat this like a mingle log and tag around!

When Fiddleford McGucket said party streamers, no one knew that what he meant was dozens and dozens of feet of plastic tape pulled out of old casettes and tied to any high-up piece of old rusty metal McGucket could find.

When Fiddleford McGucket said enough beans for everybody, no one could have known that there would be a bean can mountain over six feet tall piled precariously on a tarp.

When Fiddleford McGucket had said moonshine made from a Ribombee, it might have crossed some more fearful minds that he had meant that literally. Thankfully, he didn't. There are two jugs of the honeystuff going around, and if anyone who's obviously less than sixteen or so gets hold of one of them, they'll find the jar lifted out of their grip by a pair of dirty bandaged hands, possibly while McGucket himself is hanging upside-down above their heads from a garbage edifice. It's good, but don't drink too much of it. There's also nonalcoholic cider that's rather more plentiful. McGucket says it's made from apricorns, but no one is sure how he managed it. It tastes funny but it won't put hair on your chest, unless it does. It also looks not so different from that honeyshine. Be careful not to mix them up.

The banjo music, though, is exactly as promised.

The party is centered around a bonfire with a great big old pot hanging above it, full of cooking beans. The empty cans are being fed to McGucket's Trubbish and a wild one or two around. You might spot a Rattata or a spooked Pidove skittering out of a pile of trash, and McGucket himself has had to chase a Stunky away with his hat more than once.

But he greets every single party guest with a broad smile and a hearty handshake, and you're not leaving this party hungry if he can help it -- as long as you like beans.

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DANCIN!

Wrath isn't exactly great at dancing-- he's good at fighting, but despite what West Side Story would have you believe, the two don't have much in common unless you're very good.

But that's not going to stop him from joining in the fun!

When McGucket starts going hog wild, Wrath leaps in as well with a wild cry, leaping and cavorting like something out of Where the Wild Things Are. At his side, there is a Ditto who actually has a much better sense of rhythm than he does, but is mostly just.

Furiously undulating like a lava lamp on fast-forward.

Banjo music is so not Jelly's style, but it's the first chance he's gotten to get everybody looking at him this entire party, so if he has to boogie to banjo, so be it.

Hmmmmm... Gulliver the Klefki isn't sure about the whirlwind of hair and teeth that's spinning around, but he likes the moves of that Ditto. So he's just going to jangle right over to Jelly and start shaking his keys this way and that with him, adding some percussive jingling to the banjo cacophony.

A whirlwind of hair and teeth is a pretty good way of describing what's happening.

Jelly is, by comparison, a little less imposing-- but when the Klefki joins him? His response is the exact opposite of being grateful for the musical accompaniment.

This is because Jelly is an asshole.

The Ditto's beady little eyes narrow, and he starts to undulate even faster.

AIN'T NO WAY HE'S BEING UPSTAGED BY A SET OF CARKEYS! NOT TODAY!!

An asshole Ditto? Look, Gulliver might be a young Pokemon, but one of the things he's learned so far is that Dittos (all two that he's met) are super, creepily friendly, so he just assumes that this Ditto is too. So when Jelly starts undulating faster, Gulliver takes it for friendliness and jingles harder, bobbing up and down in the air.

Yay! New friend!

CONGRATULATIONS OLIVER you have literally just met the opposite of a creepily friendly Ditto. Jelly is 100% pure attention whore douchebag.

The Ditto's gelatinous face scrunches up.

HOW... DARE HE!

After a second or two of even more ferocious jiggling, Jelly has had enough. He quickly whips up a nasty pink tentacle and lashes out to try and smack Gulliver right out of the air. But like, really fast. So that maybe anyone who might be watching will miss it and therefore not be able to blame it on him.

Gulliver doesn't even see it coming.

The smack hits him broadside, and he goes tumbling to the floor with a loud jingle. He just lays there for a moment, shocked and so upset he's almost crying little Klefki tears, then hops back up and floats away as fast as he can to find Jean. Daaaaaaaaad! That mean Ditto hit him!

"Now, now, what's all this about?" McGucket waddles over to the scene of the altercation. That jelly feller gives him the heebiejeebies, though he can't put his finger on why, but McGucket is prepared to hear this out fairly. Can't be having no fights on his birthday, no sir.

Gulliver recognizes McGucket as a trusted person, and goes crying to him. He was just dancing, and that mean, mean Ditto hit him! He fell on the ground and now his keys are dirty and what if Charybdis sees him like this? She's not even here but what if? He jingles frantically in front of Fiddleford's face before recognizing a great hiding spot when he sees one and ducking under his beard.

The jingling continues, but now it's muffled by beard.

The Ditto, who would rather die than be viewed poorly by anyone, even the Very Ugly Human in front of him, doubles down and dances even harder, as though his laminated-paper-wobbling noises might somehow drown out Gulliver's distressed jingling.

SEE!

SEE HOW GOOD HE IS AT DANCING.

HE COULDN'T POSSIBLY HAVE DONE ANYTHING WRONG.

IF YOU'RE GOOD AT A THING, IT MEANS YOU ARE NEVER GUILTY OF ANYTHING.

"Well, would you look at that? I got a set of livin' keys in my beard!" he cries with...delight? Probably delight. It's not the weirdest thing that's happened to him -- not by far. McGucket pats his beard, gently, with a dirty hand. "You just stay in there as long as you like, little feller," he croons, in a voice that would be soothing if it weren't, you know, the hoarse caterwaul of Fiddleford McGucket. "It's okay--it's okay."

Then, he turns to the Ditto. "Now, why don't you--" Mmm, this critter sure is wobbly. "Hey--you--" It's hard to hear himself think at the best of times over the music and the air-raid sirens, but the laminated-paper-wobble is one noise too much. "--you stop your wigglin' for a minute, jelly critter, you and I gotta have words!"

Yes, good, this is where he's going to stay. Gulliver quiets down a little at Fiddleford's soothing, and even pokes his face out of the protective beard layers after a moment to glare at Jelly. He sees you, big mean Ditto! He sees you, and he will not forget this insult! Now you're going to get yelled at by Grandpa Beard, and Gulliver is going to sit here and feel heaps and heaps of schadenfreude! You hear him? Heaps!

NO ONE CAN STOP HIS WIGGLING!!

HE IS TOO POWERFUL!!

Well, actually, the power of disapproval has immense sway over the Ditto, and the wiggles do begin to slow.

Oh no... this wasn't supposed to happen! He wasn't supposed to get in trouble!

Jelly finally wobbles to a semi-halt and turns his eyes, which he makes as large and innocent as possible, up to the party host. Who, him? How could you ever suspect Jelly of doing anything bad?

Fiddleford pulls a very, very deep frown. He is immune to puppy eyes. He has a Purrloin.

"That's better. Now, go on an' tell me what happened."

He says this like he fully expects the Ditto to use human words.

You know who else is immune to puppy eyes? Gulliver, that's who. In fact, Jelly's attempts at looking innocent just send him into a frothing, jingly rage, and he soars out from Fiddleford's beard to loom over his shoulder and jingle with indignation. How dare you, Jelly? HOW VERY DARE?!

The Ditto... sort of contracts in the closest approximation a pile of living putty can make to an offended gasp.

THIS! THIS IS INTIMIDATION!

Intimidation tactics!

That's so low!

How dare you jangle, keys?!

The Ditto makes a babbling noise, gesturing to Gulliver angrily.

HOW can you expect him to be honest under these conditions?! He is being menaced.

"Heh heh, whoa! Easy there, li'l feller." McGucket reaches up and takes hold of Gulliver, manhandling him back towards the beard. "Just git on back in McGucket's beard, now, shoutin' won't do nobody any good! I'm tryin' to mediate!"

Edited 2018-03-29 20:24 (UTC)

Gulliver does not go quietly into that dark night; no, he rages, rages against the dying of the light... because he's been stuffed back in McGucket's beard, where he's hidden behind beard hairs. He's still jingling and complaining loudly, but it's muffled by grandfatherly hairiness.

Just you wait until he's out of here, Ditto... just you wait!

It's only once Gulliver is SILENCED (or... close to it) that Jello deigns to tell his side of the story-- which he does, through a lot of squeaking and very theatrical, rubbery pantomiming.

It would seem that he had been dancing peacefully for a delighted audience when the Klefki came up and MALICIOUSLY attempted to upstage him, dancing so recklessly that he even endangered the watchers with flying keys! A thing that Jello would NEVER do! Never, ever! ~~He would. Jello does not care about anybody's personal safety.~~

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gobblewonked - 2018-04-14 04:26 (UTC) - Expand

That jelly-lookin' feller sure is weird, but McGucket doesn't pay him no mind. Instead, he whirls around with Wrath, stomping his feet and hooting and having a grand old time. Ain't no wrong way to dance except not dancin' at all!

Buddy the Trubbish waddles up and starts tapping his little trash feet, pulling a pair of musical spoons out of his mouth. He practiced this! Let him show off!

Wrath is more than happy to ignore his little pink blob's desperate bids for attention-- he's got dancin' to do!

When Buddy whips out his musical spoons, Wrath can barely contain himself. He throws his head back and lets out a wild coyote howl, throwing his arms in the air.

Music and dancing isn't something he ever had any exposure to as a Homunculus-- that's something he has to give credit to the humans for. Noise that's nice! A greater invention than anything even remotely related to alchemy, quite frankly.

This feral child is perfect.

As he's stomping around, McGucket slaps a message to Wrath against his thighs and shoulder: your dancing is very good! the subtitles read.

Edited 2018-02-25 22:33 (UTC)

Wrath can definitely be said to be stunted in a number of ways-- but one thing he isn't is a slow learner.

Without missing a beat, he taps back a message of his own!

THANKS I HAVE BEEN PRACTICING!

And yes. When he does it, the subtitles are in all caps. How? They Just Are.

Hey, who is McGucket to question all-caps subtitles?

I am grateful that you came to my celebration he slaps, mid-dance.

OF COURSE I CAME I AM A VERY GOOD TEAM MATE!!

AND THIS IS A VERY GOOD PARTY!

I'VE NEVER BEEN TO A PARTY BEFORE EXCEPT ONE AND I GOT IN TROUBLE SO IT WASN'T GOOD

He is just... slapping all of this out rapidfire. While still jumping like a hooligan.

He could not be happier.

I will have this party once a year McGucket hambones out as he does a whirling jig.

He goes on: You would be welcome at the next one, my friend

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