[He's not even going to argue the cursing, just look at Jean with something close to apology.]
That's... my life, back there. In space.
[Having to be okay for everyone else. They needed him to be. The universe needed him to be. What right did he have to be selfish, to want something for his own sake? Even something as simple as being "okay". Or admitting he wants it. For a while, he'd let himself relax here, let himself want things.]
[But it was clear he shouldn't have. Wasn't it? Let his guard down and look what happened.]
Jean, I... [He doesn't even know what he's trying to say. He did, but then Jean goes and says that.]
[Words just leave him. For once. And all he can do is look at Jean for several long moments.]
[His move is going to be a hug. Just. Wordlessly hug Jean like his life depends on it.]
action
That's... my life, back there. In space.
[Having to be okay for everyone else. They needed him to be. The universe needed him to be. What right did he have to be selfish, to want something for his own sake? Even something as simple as being "okay". Or admitting he wants it. For a while, he'd let himself relax here, let himself want things.]
[But it was clear he shouldn't have. Wasn't it? Let his guard down and look what happened.]
Jean, I... [He doesn't even know what he's trying to say. He did, but then Jean goes and says that.]
[Words just leave him. For once. And all he can do is look at Jean for several long moments.]
[His move is going to be a hug. Just. Wordlessly hug Jean like his life depends on it.]