victory_road | [video / action for new bark town]

[Ford is perhaps better-equipped than most to deal with suddenly being dropped into a strange world unlike anything he's ever seen before. That was his life for thirty-odd years, and that it's begun again doesn't trouble him much. He'll adapt; he always has, with time. The woman (clearly younger than him) calling herself his mother is a little strange, but further inquiry and a cursory scan of the literature included in his new backpack answer most of his questions. In particular, they explain the neat little device that looks very much like an odd cellphone. This 'Pokégear' can be used to communicate with other people, and so that is exactly what Ford decides to do. If he's learned anything in his prior experience with this sort of thing, it's to ask questions.

The camera shakes a little, and his face is sort of awkwardly off to the side of the frame, but he managed to get it working and that's the important thing. For a first try he's not doing all that badly. Behind him, trees and a couple of quaint New Bark Town roofs are visible.]

Greetings! Is greetings the polite form of salutation in this universe? My name is Stanford Pines, and like what I assume must be the majority of you, I am not a native of this world. I only just arrived today, in fact. This is probably the warmest welcome I've seen since the universe where every day is your birthday.

[That place got old really fast, honestly (and you got old really fast if you stayed there too long).]

But, to business. [He holds up a pokéball with the hand not holding the 'gear.] How do you open--

[As if on cue, the Pokéball pops open and out of the light materializes a small green creature. It takes one look at him, lets out a surprised trill, and zips away out of frame.]

Oh! [Ford peers in the direction it went, clearly thrilled to bits.] I think it hid in those bushes, hold on --

[Those who reply by 'gear will get to follow what is essentially Ford Pines liveblogging his attempts to recapture his own starter. Or perhaps, if you're in New Bark Town as well, you'd like to help in person? An old man crashing around in the underbrush on the outskirts of town is sure to draw attention.]

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[Well, it didn't want the charmingly-arranged food in his bento, but it might be more partial to nuts and berries anyway. It is an animal.]

That's not a bad thought.

[He reaches into his pack and rummages around, pulling out the bag and then popping it open. Hey, weird green thing, do you want a craisin? It peers at him from around a tree trunk, one glossy green eye visible, but doesn't emerge.]

No? They're good, you know.

_{[Heather swallows audibly, then adds more clearly--]}

Get down into a crouching position, make yourself smaller! It won't be as threatening.

[If Ford were paying a bit more attention he might notice that she's giving him advice ironically, but as it is that doesn't seem like too bad an idea either. Worth a shot. He can be rather imposing, what with being a very large brick of a man whose chin could moonlight as a cinderblock. He crouches down on his haunches and reaches into the bag again.]

What about a cashew?

[Cashews are about the most non-threatening thing he can think of. And yet, it doesn't move. It doesn't even blink. Are those eyes that are capable of blinking in the first place? They don't look entirely organic.]

I think it simply isn't interested.

_{[TO HER CREDIT, she actually is trying to help him out! ... It's just that this is also freaking comedy gold, and she's never been one to turn down a good laugh. And okay, yeah, she might also be trying to see how much weird stuff she can get this huge old dude to do just by suggesting it.]}

Awh.

Maybe if you laid down flat on the ground.

That always gets my starter to come over.

_{[Mostly because it put her face in licking range, but there you go.]}

[Unfortunately -- or perhaps fortunately? -- for Heather, Ford has been getting some other advice as well. If he doesn't respond right away, it's because he just got a stick thrown at his face.]

_{[BEAUTIFUL, OH MAN, OH MAN, AND TO THINK THAT THIS WAS CAPTURED ON VIDEO. WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!]

[If Ford flips back to Heather's channel, he will find her laughing her brains out.]}

[Oh my god. Rude, Heather.]

Yes, yes, very funny. But it worked!

_{[Hey, some things just don't change.]

[Wiping literal tears of laughter from her eyes, Heather straightens up, voice still thick with laughter.]}

HAhaaa, yeah, great, but... seriously, is there any way we can get a slo-mo replay of that?

Any way at all?

I... probably. I admit I'm not familiar enough with these devices to know.

[FORD]

Theoretically, yes. But you'll have to do it yourself. I'm not enabling this.

HAHA, okay, okay, I don't want it that badly. I'll learn to live without it.

_{[HOOOOO. Okay, serious talk now.]}

You were able to get your starter to stop running away, though?

Yes, yes. I think it simply needed to see that I wasn't a threat.

[Somewhere along the line it became a game, and getting hit in the face with the stick was the final nail in the 'this guy isn't a threat at all, he's just hilarious' coffin.]

I imagine it must be as jarring for them as it is for us.

Some of 'em are more nervous than others.

Mine was all over me the second I got him. _{[MUCH TO HER DISPLEASURE, tbh.]}

[His mood seems to turn on a dime.]

What species is he?

I'll show you.

_{[LET HER SHOW YOU HER POKEMANS]}

Cujo! Here, boy!

_{[There is a GREAT PANTING AND CLICKING OF CLAWS before half the frame is obscured by an ENORMOUSLY FAT AND SHAGGY GROWLITHE, one that's almost big enough to be mistaken for a very small Arcanine. BIG DOGGO COMING THRU.]}

[Good lord, that is one big doggo.]

Well! I see what you mean about affection.

[His Elgyem, now a little bolder and less intent on hiding in bushes and behind trees, peers into the frame as well.]

How long have you had him?

_{[THE BIGGEST]

[She rubs his mane vigorously, and he leans on her with his considerable full weight, tongue lolling out in pure, uncomplicated happiness.]}

Since I got here, so... about six years.

We've been through a lot together, me and him!

You've been here for six years?

Sure have.

_{[As she speaks, she carries on rubbing her dog, much to his delight.]}

Standard disclaimer, most people don't stay here that long.

I'm just special like that.

[video / action for new bark town]

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i can't believe he fell into the portal ONE YEAR too early to know the reference

OH NO

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