Po-ta-toes! Boil 'em, mash 'em, stick 'em in a... curry?

[indigo_events]

Who: Everybody! The Snorlax! The Munchlax! The Mystery Guests!
Where: Route 39
When: March 20th and 21st
Summary: Lets cook some curries.
Rating: General.
Log:


Early spring brings with it bright sunshine and slightly chilly air, green shoots of new grass poking up from the earth as farmers survey fields that have laid bare all winter. Across Johto and Kanto (and who knows where else?), windows and doors are thrown open to air out spaces closed up for the winter, the commencement of a mysterious rite known only as ‘spring cleaning.’

At MooMoo Ranch, it heralds an additional rite: the yearly tradition that precedes the tilling of those fields and the sowing of seeds:



THE GREAT CURRY COOKOUT

Let’s just be up front about this: the entirety of Route 38 smells absolutely amazing. Traditionally (you’re going to hear that word a lot here), the curries cooked up by the locals are made of whatever leftovers from the previous year’s harvest that may be found kicking around the various parlours and cellars, but because humans can’t eat the berries that Pokemon can, and because they want to eat too, and because once you let humans at a recipe, they can’t not experiment with it...

If you can imagine a curry, someone has either made it, is in the process of making it, or is preparing to make it right the heck now. There are some dishes that don’t seem too out of place: sausage curries, curries with tinned meat or beans added to the mix, mushroom curries, curries decorated so cutely that they flood your Poke-Instagram page, potato curries, herb-laden curries, spice-tastic curries, coconut curries, curries accompanied by savory burger steaks...these all at least seem like normal curry variants, right?

And then there’s the odd stuff. Curries topped with swirls of spaghetti, boiled-egg curries, instant-noodle curries loaded up next to curries topped with a medley of fried foods, toast slices resting on beds of curry, leeks grilled and whole on curries, apple curries, salad curries, curries with whole bones kept in them to add additional flavor, tropical curries with decorative flowers added on the side, cheese-covered curries, even...whipped cream curries…? Uh...sure, okay! There’s even the rare smoked Slowpoke Tail curry, the tail packages labeled with “CRUELTY-FREE SLOWPOKE TAIL” and seals of legal and bureaucratic approval. Dry, sweet, spicy, bitter, sour - you name it, there’s a curry for it!

It’s a little weird, though, right? All this curry, and, uh, all these Snorlax… and Munchlax… wait, actually, when did those start to show up?! Is this… safe??? The locals don’t seem surprised in the least, but there sure are a lot of them…. did they all really come down from the mountains?

Is this part of the tradition, too?!

Good question!

Lucky for YOU, any trainer (un?)fortunate enough to be caught standing still for one second too long by one of the elderly locals (or walks too close to one, or accepts a curry offering from one) will be treated to a retelling of the story behind both the Snorlax and the curry. Turns out, the salivating Snorlax and the just-as-hungry baby Munchlax are not just part of the tradition -- they’re the reason for it!

Long ago, in the day of so-and-so’s grandmother’s grandmother’s grandmother, the Snorlax and Munchlax were a downright menace. Every year, once the snows would start to melt, they’d start coming down from the mountains to the north in droves, descending upon the farms and fields just as that year’s planting began to sprout like a plague of very hungry caterpies, gobbling up everything in sight until nothing but barren earth remained. They even busted down fences and barns in their pursuit of fresh food! Proper menaces to society, right here.

At first, the farmers tried to battle the Snorlax, but it did not end well. Their Miltank and Tauros herds weren’t meant for battle, and Snorlax are as mighty as their appetites! Then one year, a young farm girl had an idea! (Depending on who's telling the story, it might have been a farm boy. Or just a farmer, gender unknown. It is always, mysteriously, someone in the teller's family tree.) Rather than trying to fight off the Snorlax, this mysterious individual suggested inviting them all to one big dinner. They could cook up all the leftovers from the last harvest, have a big feast out of it and feed the hungry Snorlax so they'd leave the seedlings alone.

And it worked! The Snorlax were happy, the fields were left alone and the fences and barns kept standing strong.

(Well, except that one year with ol’ man Gregory’s barn, but that had very little to do with the Snorlax, and far more to do with ol’ man Gregory’s fierce enjoyment of the special sake brewed by the monks of Sprout Tower, a very terrible bet, and one prized herd of Miltanks and really, if you don’t watch it, you might be stuck listening to that old tale as well.)

Obviously, since the current farms and fields are still intact and going strong, the feast not only worked, but held strong as a tradition. But hey! It’s a fun story, and the curry is good! And oh my ARCEUS, you have heard this story so many times from so many old farming folks you are so tired, please, you just wanted to find a bathroom, yes, thank you for the bowl of curry, you really must be going now-

Only… there’s something weird about this year’s gathering. Something unexpected.

In addition to the Snorlax and Munchlax lumbering down in droves for a good meal, another kind of Pokemon has emerged, lured by the delectable scents, and it’s not one that many folks have seen before. Keen-eyed trainers can spot them just about everywhere: lingering under the eaves of the roofs, peeking out from behind bushes and tree branches, but most of all, slowly drawing close to the source of all those delicious smells, their voices ringing out like clear little bells.

That’s right, Milcery are swarming!

Unfortunately, the Snorlax and Munchlax don’t seem too keen on sharing their special once-a-year treat. Hangry tempers are starting to flare up, the bubbling of many pots and pans joined by low grumbling as the Snorlax and Munchlax are starting to stake claim against these strange newcomers. In fact, someone should probably get out there and try and calm the situation down.

Which doesn’t mean take out your pokemon and start any battles! Anyone trying to do that will get a right scolding by one of those inescapable geriatric storytellers. Do you want to cause some sort of stampede here like what claimed ol’ man Gregory’s barn? No sir! (Who’s sir? We’re unclear.) There will be no battling here. Put on your best smile! Break out that cheery personality, and try to actually peacekeep. Or if that isn’t your thing, maybe try and help out with the cooking. With this many cooks around, there is always someone who needs an extra hand to peel some potatoes or dice some carrots, right? If you got a particular hankering, why not claim one of those may pots and pans for yourself and start preparing your own prized curry?

Because judging by the mass of Snorlax, Munchlax, and Milcery? We are going to need a bigger curry.

Comments

Krieg || OTA

[fuelthefire]

Heck yeah, heck yeah, it's cookout time! Of course Pokéland's resident Psycho has shown up to partake. Spring may barely have sprung and there may still be a lingering bite of winter chill in the air, but he's put his sweaters away for the year. No need to mess with those again until November, or December at the earliest, if he's really lucky. His pecs aren't on full display today, however, as he has donned an orange apron in keeping with the spirit of things. A one-eyed Darumaka sits peacefully in front of his cookfire, and an inquisitive Espeon prowls nearby to keep an eye on things.

1.) I LOVE TO WAIT FOR MY MEALS!
Krieg likes food, and he enjoys making food, and...wow, that sure is a big old pile of peppers he's chopping. Surely he's not going to put all of those in--oh. Oh, yeah, he did. He just slid what looks like the chopped corpses of five or six unidentified peppers into the curry pot with one smooth motion of his chopping knife. Looks like there's already some ground beef, onions, and spices simmering away in the bottom. After witnessing his apparent complete disregard for life and limb, are you brave enough to ask how he's doing? Or...what he's doing?

2.) SHARING IS CARING: HELLFIRE HALITOSIS EDITION
The spices have been toasted and the fifty-five alarm curry has been simmered to perfection. Krieg is equally happy offering to share with friends and strangers alike. Half the time, he doesn't even have to be asked; a bowl of curry is simply offered. The food itself is innocuous enough. It looks perfectly edible even if it smells a little...hot.

"Are you ready to breathe fire for real?"

He's...surely he's joking, right? Are you going to take him up on that?

At least a responsible human being (likely Maya or Angel) has supplied a crate of Moo Moo Milk - a dozen glass bottles filled with the stuff sit nearby, ready for the eventual palate emergency.

3.) HURT ME TILL YOU LOVE ME!
Krieg may be here for the cooking, but he is also ready to eat! He's absolutely wandering over to other cook stations, whether or not he knows the person working them, and peeking into the pot like some kind of towering shirtless muscle hobo.

"Is it ready yet?"

2

[brokencode]

[It's... almost incredible how easily Angel has slid back into her normal routine. She watches Krieg work in his Krieg-y way with two parts fondness and one part incredulity, the same way she watches most things that Krieg does. Most of her Pokemon have vacated the premises, preferring to stay as far away from the psycho's heated cooking as possible. Skagbait is the only one who ventures close enough, even waiting eagerly for her turn at the curry.

Angel lingers as well, though her eyes threaten to water if she get too close. She clutches a bottle of moo-moo milk, ready to take one bite out of courtesy, down the entire thing, and never try it again. She's supportive, but not that supportive.]

You already have your first guest. [She nods to the Lucario, still staring hungrily at the pot. Angel's a little worried about the creature, but she won't discourage either of them]

[fuelthefire]

[Of course Krieg could count on Skagbait; after so long together he and the reticent Lucario have negotiated a pleasant equilibrium. Even back in the care of her proper trainer, the bond between Psycho and Lucario remains. Skagbait is always the first of Angel's 'mons to queue up when Krieg's been cooking.

He grins at Skagbait and offers her a camping plate piled with a Lucario-sized serving of his latest campfire innovation. Steel-types may be weak to fire, but he knows Skagbait can handle this particular heat.]

D'you wanna taste, too?

[Instead of a plate of the stuff, Krieg offers Angel a clean spoon. The man may be absolutely careless in almost all aspects of his life, but he's been off of Pandora long enough to hone his people-observing skills. Not that one would need particularly honed observational skills to see Angel's apprehension regarding the contents of his cooking pot. Besides, he knows her. Even if she could hide it, he'd suspect what she was feeling. He won't be upset in the slightest if she says no. He'll just laugh like an asshole and give her a hug, instead.]

[brokencode]

May I? [The substance in the pot looks downright terrifying. Even one taste is certain to burn her tastebuds away and leave her stomach in knots for the rest of the night. Yet she takes the spoon, dips it into the pot as quick as she can and pulls it back out.

The smell alone makes her eyes water, but she spares herself little time to think about that and instead shoves the utensil into her mouth. As expected it burns her unpracticed senses. She forces herself to swallow, and then sets to downing the entire glass of milk. Still, she manages to hold up a very encouraging thumbs-up.]

It's -- [She stifles a cough.] It's good!

[fuelthefire]

[Krieg hadn't thought it was possible to love Angel any more than he already does, but here she is, once again demonstrating her unwavering support for him and his culinary endeavors, despite the obvious hazard to herself.]

Cough if you gotta!

[He knows the concoction in his pot is strong enough to strip paint, so he's currently experiencing a healthy amount of concern warring with the strong surge of affection her simple action has inspired.]

[brokencode]

[She holds the cough in for the span of a few seconds. The smile she wears, the one she forces out, twitches at the corners, before collapsing in on itself entirely. She sputters and coughs, flames still licking at her lips, over her tongue and down her throat.

She does her best to catch her breath, but -- even more humiliating, she starts to hiccup.]

I'm -- Fine. [It's not a very convincing argument, all things considered.]

[fuelthefire]

[Well this sure is the worst possible outcome. D:

Eyebrows knit in concern, Krieg reaches over and rubs her back with one hand when she starts to hiccup.]

Mnngh. I'll keep the fire for the Psycho. D'you want more milk?

[Punk Face the Espeon is getting all up ins on this biz, too, doubly concerned by both his trainer's distress and Angel's. He leans his slender purple body up against Angel's legs in a fuzzy show of support.

1

[sleepallthewayhome]

[Newt is watching curiously. She's never made curry before so she only has the people around here to go by but....]

Are you really supposed to put that many peppers in?

Re: 1

[fuelthefire]

[Newt's question makes him giggle, and he looks over at her, grinning widely and obviously under his mask.]

There's no rules and no one can stop me!

[It's an interesting way to answer a "yes" or "no" question. Almost like he's aware he just did something potentially dangerous.]

[sleepallthewayhome]

[Newt seems to think over this response and then ...nods like it makes perfect sense. Oh right, this is still a nine year old child.]

Do you want me to find you more peppers?

[Because Newt isn't cooking herself and she wants to be helpful.]

[fuelthefire]

[This is just one of the many reasons Newt and Krieg get along so well.]

Nah, I got all the peppers.

[He gestures to his prep area which does, indeed, contain an alarming stack of peppers.]

But I need more onion.

[sleepallthewayhome]

I can get some!

[Newt really likes being helpful and she'll run off for a moment. Before coming back with a basket of onions. There are a lot of onions. Where did she get them all? Who knows but she found them!]

Here!

[fuelthefire]

[Does Krieg need that many onions? Absolutely not. Is he going to share this information with Newt? Also no.]

You're the best, Firefly!

[And he will just. Accept all of those onions. And maybe select one to peel and chop up; the bubbling pot of nuclear curry is simmering a little low, so a bit more onion will build it back up nicely.]

Are you getting lots to eat?

2

[fingersandteeth]

Steven grins in challenge at the shirtless guy. "Try me," he says, holding his hand out to take the bowl.

[fuelthefire]

Krieg's never seen this guy before but that doesn't matter! He's always down to meet new people, especially if they're game to have their entire mouth flambéd by his latest attempt at cooking with ghost peppers. He hands over the bowl with a hidden grin that can still be seen in his eyes.

"Bottoms up!"

Is this curry too thick to chug? It absolutely is. Does Krieg care? Absolutely not.

[fingersandteeth]

No spoon? Fine. He'll tip the bowl into his mouth and have it that way.

It's hot. God, it's spicier than his Tia Marina's shrimp sopa. His eyes are watering a little as he sets the bowl down down clean, then plucks a bottle of moomoo milk from the crate, pops the cap off and takes a long swig.

"Good," he comments.

[fuelthefire]

Look, he forgets things sometimes, okay? All you gotta do if you want a spoon is ask for one - but, oh, well, looks like this guy is a team player, so even better.

"Hah!" Krieg chortles a bit, absolutely pleased with both the man's reaction and with the praise. "You'll never breathe fire if you drown it in milk!" It's just a friendly remark, and also not precisely correct. Krieg has already had a bowlful, and while it did absolutely feel like his entire mouth was on metaphorical fire, there had sadly been no literal fire to be seen. He'll just have to wait for the next weird weekend where everyone gets their neat abilities back before he can breathe fire again for real.

"Who're you?"

[fingersandteeth]

"Steven," he says, then considers that there are, in fact, three of them. "Steven Durante," he amends. "The only one who isn't a kid. You?"

[fuelthefire]

Does that name ring any bells? Maybe, maybe not. At least half of what he hears on a day to day basis hits with a faint ring of deja vu - and it has for as long as he can remember. He barely even notices it anymore.

"Krieg! Just Krieg."

Surnames are for other people.

"Are you new?"

2

[notyourgoddess]

[It was probably both Angel and Maya making sure there was a lot of milk. Maya is off to the side.]

Anyone breathe fire yet?

[If it happens. It will happen here.]

[fuelthefire]

Not yet!

[It's a little disappointing so far if he's honest, but the day is still young; there's plenty of time yet for unfortunate fireworks.]

D'you wanna try?

[notyourgoddess]

Well there's still the rest of the day.

[She's been wandering around trying curry as its being made.]

Sure. I'll have some.

[fuelthefire]

[He knows Maya's got a better constitution than Angel, but he still spoons up a conservative serving for her - this amount of heat absolutely isn't for everyone, and he doesn't have it in him to take it personally if what he offers isn't finished.

Besides, Zen Doll has been more than happy to consume whatever leftovers have been discarded. The Snorlax may be the guests of honor here, but the Darumaka is clearly the real winner of the day.

He hands over the plate and spoon with a grin, eager for her verdict, whether positive or negative.]

Bon appetit!

[notyourgoddess]

[Oh there's no way she's going to be able to eat all of it. But she's curious enough to try. Which she will...and then laughs after coughing and coughs some more.]

Krieg. That tastes like fire.

[Maya why are you having another spoonful, Maya why? Oh well. Don't worry Zen Doll you'll get your share after she has a bit more.]

Good fire though.

[fuelthefire]

[That's high praise coming from anyone, but it's doubly good coming from Maya. Once she makes her pronouncement, he just laughs one of his gutbusting laughs, loud and booming and only slightly unhinged.]

Mnahahahahahahaha! There's plenty more where that came from!

[This causes Zen Doll to squeak in alarm - hey, now, you can't just give all of this amazing curry away! D:]