[video]

[goldeneyeball]

_{[It's been a while since JW has appeared on the network. Today he is sitting at a breakfast table in the lobby of the Violet Hotel. He's not eating anything but there is a glass of orange juice at his elbow. Psyduck's paws can be seen poking into the corner of the frame.]}

Hey, ya'll. Question.

_{[He glances to the side, clearly looking at something with disdain.]}

Which Pokemon do you hate the most?

_{[Feed ends.]}

Comments

[pretendingto]

[A video feet starts in on a little girl with a stony expression. She waits a moment, eyes glancing over to make sure it's on and pointed at her face.]

You.

[And off.]

[goldeneyeball]

_{[JW waits patiently, wondering what hot takes this child is going to have. Then she dunks on him.]}

Oh, fuck you!

[uber_marionettist]

You ever been vored by four hundred magic sardines?

Wishiwashi can change that for you.

[text]

[goldeneyeball]

what does vored mean

i looked up WishiWashi on the computer. its just a bunch of little fishes dont get it

video;

[amaure]

Mm... I suppose Tropius.

[Is he serious? It seems so. Who could hate such a lovable banana dinosaur? Apparently this guy.]

And what of you? Which of these creatures has earned such an ireful expression of disdain?

[text]

[uber_marionettist]

Vore, from the Latin vorare (to "swallow" or "devour"). A paraphilia (that's "fetish lite") based on the consumption of or by the fetishist.

Re: video;

[goldeneyeball]

Tropius...Tro-pi-us...

_{[He murmurs to himself as he searches through the Poke'dex.]}

Oh, hmm. Banana dinosaur. Looks smug. Yeah, I hate it too. Good choice.

_{[JW gives a nod. When his own opinion is asked for he is more than ready to give it.]}

It's the--ah, fuck. I don't know what it's called. It's this weird...dog fish horse thing that's got a metal head and it's like a robot?

[pretendingto]

[No expression in her eyes. Unperturbed.]

I'm eleven.

[You really gonna fight with a preteen, dude? Is your pride really so fragile?]

[text]

[goldeneyeball]

_{[JW's next reply doesn't come right away because he has a little trouble understanding Dirk's phrasing. It's weird but he finally gets it. This guy must be some weird professor or some shit.]}

oh so theyre like paranas. yeah fuck that

[goldeneyeball]

_{[YES. YES IT IS.]}

So? You're old enough to know when you're being an asshole. Get off my post, peewee!

Video

[stardiving]

Yamask.

[Yes, he is still holding that grudge, thank you, he's held previous ones for 20 years, he has experience.]

Though why that interests you, I have no idea.

Video

[goldeneyeball]

_{[JW takes a moment to scroll through the 'dex and find what a Yamask looks like.]}

Kinda creepy. Yeah, I don't trust it. And why not? Everybody has something they can't stand and the only thing people in this world seem to think about is Pokemon. Surely there are some universal experiences here. In my world nobody likes wasps.

[pretendingto]

I hate people who hate pokémon.

[She isn't even that invested in pokémon yet. She just doesn't like his attitude. She shrugs.]

You asked.

video;

[amaure]

Smug barely begins to describe it, but yes.

[Try "murderer of trees". His poor maple tree, may it rest in piece.]

Ah, Type-Null I believe? It is a rather interesting chimeric abomination, I admit. Though the unskillful means of its creation is rather tragic. While I cannot say I hate the monster, I do pity its hollow and mournful existence.

Video

[stardiving]

You should not. And let it nowhere near your face.

[He considers a moment--sure, wasps are horrid in Eorzea, the size of cats, but...]

I would rather deal with a wasp than a gnat. Vilekin the size of a man, with teeth to match.

[Gnats...are very different where he's from.]

video;

[goldeneyeball]

THAT'S it! Null! I hate those things! This bitch nearly ran over me with one on a trail once. The thing moved like some kind of taxidermy clockwork nightmare!

[goldeneyeball]

Then we can hate each other. Suits me! Get lost.

Re: Video

[goldeneyeball]

_{[JW mostly follows. He has no idea what Vilekin is but he can guess it's nothing good.]}

Damn. Yall got sharks?

video;

[amaure]

It is fairly wretched, yes. Though it would seem more the one at fault for such an incident was the woman, than the beast. Yet, I cannot blame you for holding onto such a horrid visual display with such fury. Perhaps were I in your shoes, I would feel much the same

My experience with the creature has been limited to my young lover's own. Fairly incapable, reeks of cannabis, oft does it have bugs stuck to some never ending secretion from its body...it's all rather unpleasant and pathetic, really.

[pretendingto]

No.

[You make this too easy.]

[goldeneyeball]

_{[JW narrows his eyes. Fine. He'd play her way.]}

The Pokemon I hate most is Rattata and Type: Null.

video

[goldeneyeball]

_{[As Emet-Selch speaks, JW is squinting down at his gear. There's something about the guy's accent.]}

Yeah, they suck. Hey, are you British?

video

[amaure]

[Ah, this is not the first time he's been asked about his accent.]

I am not, no. Though I have been made aware of the shared accent—I am Garlean, though I am fair certain such a word means as much to you as British does to me.

video

[goldeneyeball]

Ohhh, huh. Interestin'. I don't get on here and talk a lot but I listen to everything. Still getting used to this unlimited number of other worlds thing. Just thought we might share a planet.

[text]

[uber_marionettist]

Kinda. But instead of four hundred little fish taking four hundred bites out of you, which would objectively suck but at least has the decency to kill you and save you some fucking indignity, they assemble into one supermassive gestalt megafish like some kind of fucked up sardine mecha and do you in that way.

Ever looked at a fish up close? Not just at a casual distance, I mean really close. Eye to literal fucking eye. Ever rubbed one on your face? How about a live one? How about hundreds of live fish compacted around you, just one big roiling mass, like a pelagic hell katamari, during which time you are also actively drowning?

Then when you finally catch it to save your own freaking life, you check the Pokeball and it contains exactly one eight-inch fish.

And yes, I still have it. Just in case you're in the market for a real bad joke.