video;

[shiro2hero]

[It's the Indigo Plateau. Still cold, still looking as chilly and mountainous as ever. With a notable exception - namely, a bedraggled-looking Shiro and his equally bedraggled team of pokemon. They're all crowding around him, trying to get a look at the camera.]

[Shiro is... grinning? Widely. He looks happier than he's looked in a long time, with one arm slung around his Aggron's broad neck, the other holding the camera out as far as possible.]

- Okay, okay! Come on. It's recording, guys, get in here.

[Umbreon hops up onto his shoulder, fur a little singed, sticking up in weird places. Marowak peers up from the bottom of the screen - helmet dinged and nicked in places. Gallade wiggles in, Gengar waving delightedly - lifting its hand up over the top of Gallade's head. Which... means Incineroar just flat out picks up Gallade to get in on this too, all of them squishing in with their Trainer like it's a big class photo.]

Hi everyone. Long time no chat. We've been busy up here... had a bad run first off, but the team pulled it together. They pulled it together really well.

[With a chorus of Pokemon agreement.]

And that means?

You're looking at the 13th Champions of the League.

[More loud, boistrous Pokemon cheering. Incineroar ends up dropping Gallade to scoop Shiro up instead. There's not much else he can do - and ends up fumbling the 'gear. It lands face-up, thankfully, for more shots of celebrating Pokemon.]

[Celebrating pokemon and Shiro's bemused, final statement - ]

... guys, we need to go back and apologize to Bruno again. Calm - calm down a minute! You didn't let me say it on the recording - !

[/END FEED.]




[Except for a final text.]

Formal apology goes to Bruno. Again. I swear I can count to four.

Comments

[lordofthefries]

[Shiro, think of who else lives in this house and you'll know the answer to those two questions is "yes".]

Everything is okay. [A heavy pause that clearly indicates she's attempting to lie when she's so bad at it.] ...Most of the time? Half the time? Maybe a few times a week?

[Another pause.]

Once a week?

[shiro2hero]

Okay.

You're... going to have to elaborate a little. Please? I'm - I've been battling the Elite 4 for a few hours.

[He can't think of anyone in the house who'd cause a problem!]

[Shiro thinks too highly of people.]

[lordofthefries]

[That's his first mistake: thinking highly of Lance.]

Um... them. The other two people... here. Your friends.

[He's so gonna make her spit it out, isn't he?]

[shiro2hero]

[Yep. Yep it was.]

Are they bothering you, Sasha? I'll talk to them - if I need to.

[lordofthefries]

No, they aren't doing anything to me. It's what they do... to each other.

[Why is she making it sound like they fist fight and throw pots and pans at each other multiple times a day? It's not that bad, Sasha!]

[shiro2hero]

[Processing...]

[Processing...]

[uh oh.]

Do - you mean they're... arguing or -?

[lordofthefries]

Nooooo, it's not fighting at all. Though it sounds like it is because he starts crying sometimes... and then I can hear banging on the walls like they're throwing things.

[Sasha, for the love of Arceus, just spit it out. You're making it worse.]

[shiro2hero]

[Arceus why.]

[Why is this happening. What has he done wrong.]

... they're ... crying and banging on walls...?

[Well now he's not sure he wants to talk to them about this.]

[lordofthefries]

No, he's crying. At least it only sounds like him. But I don't think she's beating him to make him cry. I never see a belt.

[The best way to explain the house shenanigans is probably to remind Shiro of something that happened a long ago. A great way to start.]

Mr. Shiro, remember that time I accidentally walked into your room and I thought Mr. Matt was eating you?

[shiro2hero]

[RECORD SCREECH.]

[shiro2hero]

I'll talk to them as soon as I'm home, Sasha.

[lordofthefries]

Okay.

[Sasha sighs in relief that she doesn't have to get into the dirty details of how much of Lance and Pidge she's really gotten too familiar with so far.]

Don't yell at them. I don't want them to get in trouble, but I'm tired of having to clean the kitchen table. And the counter. And the porch. And I don't know how to clean the couch, so could you do that for me, please?

1/2 again

[shiro2hero]

[She has to clean the what? And the counter? And on the porch? And ON THE COUCH?? HIS COUCH??]

[shiro2hero]

Oh, no. I won't have to.

They will. They'll clean all of it.

[lordofthefries]

[Your couch, Shiro. The one you bought from Pokekea.]

But don't yell at them. Or hit them. That's what Shadis would do to anybody he found fooling around.

Maybe you can tell them to stay in their room? I understand they are doing what married people do, but I don't want to keep having to cover Omelette's eyes every time we walk around the house.

[shiro2hero]

I'll hit them where it hurts. Their wallets. [A pause -] Which means, no, I'm not going to hit them. It means I'm going to make them pay for cleaning.

[He's catching on, see!]

You shouldn't have to do that. Ever. I'm sorry, Sasha - I had no idea they were that much of an issue.

[lordofthefries]

I guess I should have said something earlier. But I didn't because... those are your friends from your world.

[And she still thinks she ranks lower on Shiro's totem pole than Lance and Pidge do.]

Plus, they're married and I guess I can't really tell a husband and wife what to do when I don't know anything about that stuff.

[shiro2hero]

You're my friend too, Sasha. And you live there. If something's bothering you about the house, I want to know.

[He needs to know.]

You can tell them to keep it in their room. That's just - that's just common sense.

[Which apparently the two of them lack.]