>>Text

[gautsome]

[There's no vibrant smile when Sylvain opens the line. There isn't even a Sylvain for that matter. It's just text on a screen, a message carefully tapped out.]

Hey.
I'm looking to talk to someone who has left this place and come back again. Either actually leaving, or just that weird sleeping thing.
I... Have some questions. I could really use some help.

Comments

[gautsome]

Yeah, yeah. It was just an example anyway.
Not that age matters much.
Can't defend what I did to Armin, though. Though maybe it'll make you happy to know that I'm trying to repair that bridge?
Not that I'm trying to get in your good graces. I'm happy with what I have now, thank you.

I guess that makes me feel better in some regards. But... even if I were to repeat some of the things I did here, there are other things that.. can't be. The people I met and care for won't be there? And sure, I won't remember, but that makes me feel like I shouldn't bother meeting anyone new here anyways.

But like you said. What we do here still matters. The friends we make, whether locally or from other worlds, has an impact in the end.

[fingersandteeth]

I mean, it does matter somewhat to me? If only because too young and I feel like a chickenhawk. But I also know from experience that these larger age gaps seem smaller when you're the younger party.

Still, I'm glad you're making things up with Armin. I think you were distressing him more than you realized.

I don't think you should be discouraged from meeting and befriending new people just because you won't remember them. There's something to be said about living in the moment. Having those new experiences while you still can.

And even if we weren't in a situation where the people of this world are affected by our actions... "If nothing we do matters... then the only thing that matters is what we do." We should spend the time we've been given in this kinder, gentler world doing the things we can feel good about doing.

[He says, still working out how he actually feels about this whole life of crime he's stuck in, but ssshhh. Just let him quote Angel at you.]

[gautsome]

Maybe it's just more common where I come from. Of course, it's usually old men trying to get married to young girls for fame and fortune.
I'm... starting to realize that. His girlfriend went and told my boyfriend about what a big thing it was becoming and that sort of put it in perspective. And trust me, you never want Claude von Riegan giving you the disappointed eyes.
But, uh... He has a great way of gently bringing people to the right conclusions. I'm grateful to him, and her -- for that matter -- for straightening me out.

Yeah, I've been getting that advice a lot. It was just... easy to get in my head. Psych myself out of doing much of anything. My friends would say it's pretty common for me to do.

... Huh, I like the sound of that. It's... a nice new world that we're in. A new start. I've done some less than great things where I'm from. I should... at least try to be better than that.

[fingersandteeth]

Oh no, I'm not saying that older-younger pairings aren't unknown with men where I come from. There's a reason we have a *name* for older men who chase after younger ones. It's just... never been my interest? I tend to prefer men who are my age or a bit older. I've slept with younger men--I've even had longer term friends-with-benefits with them--but all things being equal, I prefer a more mature man.

Anyway, if it helps, I've done some less than great things in my old world too. Hell, I've done less than great things here. But the more I do things here *better*, the better I feel about myself.

[It's just little things, like sparring with Thace when he gets pissed off instead of mugging people. Or asking Pokemon he catches for his quota if they want to be part of Team Rocket and if they don't, just releasing them. It doesn't sound like much on paper, but it does make a difference.]

[gautsome]

See we don't really have a name for it. It just sort of... is.
But I get it. And it's probably a good thing that it didn't work out? It sounds like we're both happy with what we've got now!

That's another good thing to keep in mind, though. Focusing on getting better. Someone else said taking things one step at a time and... Those in combination seem like a good idea.

[fingersandteeth]

I definitely am, yes. And I'm glad your and your friends are working out! Polycules aren't always easy to manage. There's a lot of negotiation that goes on with them. I don't know if I could do it, myself.

And I think you're right: focus on getting better, one step at a time.