victory_road | [Video]

_{[The feed opens on a man's face very close to the screen. His eyes flick between the lens and the little in-picture image of himself in his Poke'gear's screen. This man is filthy and his eyes are rimmed with red. He licks his dry lips. He was about to address the entire world after untold years of sheer isolation, this had to be good.]}

Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhey.

_{[His voice is gruff and thin. The B-man hasn't quite gotten used how much air he needs in his lungs in order to speak. He opens his mouth to say something else but his attention is swiftly stolen by someone passing in his peripheral vision. He whips his head away takes a good long look at something before turning back to his audience.]}

HEY, HI, HOW'S IT GOIN'? This isn't how I saw my day goin', but I'm not complaining! Who doesn't love a little dimensional slip-up? Especially when it comes with perks. And a guide? What is this, my birthday? Might as well be! I've never been--

_{[He lifts the Trainer's Manual into frame when suddenly his attention starts to drift again, as though he's thinking many thoughts all at once. His chest sort of hurts. Oh. Huh. That's a sexy new sensation!]}

You know what I always say--

_{[Without warning, the man swoons and drops his 'gear. It goes tumbling, landing face-down on the path. The concerned chattering of a Pokemon can be heard from his end of the line. There is some scrambling and the creaking of plastic before the newcomer reappears. He's laying on the ground now, on his side, one leggy kicked up like he meant to do that. Mr. Juice has been saddled with the Bug Maniac's class attire and honestly he's ROCKING those shorts. He's also very winded. A Mimikyu peeks over his middle, one shadowy paw brought to its false mouth in concern.]}

--I always say, when in Rome, do as the Romans! I used to know some Romans, real swell guys. Total party animals! So, my fellow philosophers, what's a guy do to have fun around here?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Well, that's mildly concerning, but probably okay, right...?]

That depends on what sort of fun you're looking for, I guess.

Only every kind!

_{[He smiles impishly, catching his tongue in his yellow teeth.]}

Every kind, huh...

[Not picky, could be good or bad...]

Well, most of what's available is gonna have to do with Pokemon, around here. Lots of people like battling, there's the gym challenge as part of that, some people enter contests when those are sometimes held, some people do research into the local legends...

...ahh, but those are kind of broad-strokes, huh.

_{[He bobs his head along to the grocery list of various Pokemon Activities but soon it becomes clear that none of those are what he wants to hear.]}

A bit. What's the night life like? The parties?

[Ah, that sort of fun. Fair enough.]

That, I don't know much about, honestly. I mean, there's Prom, I guess, that generally happens in April. Big party, all of us otherworlders get invited, most people show up, usually something bothersome happens. But other than that... I'd be more surprised if there wasn't stuff around, but I'm not really a party person.

Hm. Well! That's not a problem. I'll just have to be the guy that starts the party. Thanks for the head's up, kid!

Sure, no problem. Ahh, though, if you want to know anything about other stuff, feel free to ask. I'm a gym leader, so helping out is part of the job.

_{[He strokes his chin thoughtfully. He's got his guide book but he's well aware there's always valuable tips you have to learn yourself. Eager as he is for the human experience, a little cheating never hurt.]}

What's the number one thing a very normal and living man such as myself should never under any circumstances put in his mouth? Hypothetically?

[That is... not the sort of question he was expecting, wow. Over a decade here and there are still new experiences to be had.

But, he did offer, so he thinks on the question for a moment.]

Hmm... I'll go with bleach, if the warning labels are anything to go by anyway.

Also, I wouldn't suggest eating Cheri or Pecha berries yourself, unless you really like being in pain for a while.

Good to know bleach is a very common and real threat here in this dimension.

_{[He's going to ignore the berry comment because the bleach thing seems more fun to needle this guy about.]}

I mean, I wouldn't try eating a Pokemon, either, but I figured they'll make that obvious themselves. But bleach, you can just buy it from a store.