victory_road | [open] I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions

Entry tags:

[open] I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions

Who: Lorenz Hellman Gloucester.... and anyone willing to deal with him
Where: Mostly Vermillion and... Around?
When: Jan+
Summary: Catchall for arrival and sorting out what the heck is going on here
Rating: R - likely talk of violence, war, possibly blood experiments, genocide, etc. Fun Femblem themes
Log:

Around Town

Lorenz can be found exploring the city in... well just about everywhere, really. There is so much here that is new and novel for him. Electricity, indoor plumbing, never mind the pokémon aspect of it. The technology is so advanced and Lorenz is precisely the type of stuffy no-nonsense person to legitimately sit down and read through instruction manuals.

Whether it's staring at the drink menu of a café in wonder or sitting down somewhere to read through the Breeder's Guide that was in his bag (sometimes even the Gear manual) every other thing seems to have him stopping to watch how things unfold. He tries his best to be polite, to not stare outright, but even at his best there is only so much he can do. when dealing with so many new things. So it's hardly surprising when he eventually catches your eye, looking absolutely flabbergasted.

"Is this.... ah- common here?"

Toge what now?

The arrival of the togepi swarm is his first encounter with wild pokémon intruding on urban spaces and at first he is a bit terrified to move lest he ens up tripping over the little things that seem to be everywhere. "Certainly a new meaning to the phrase walking on eggshells." murmured to himself with a faint smirk of amusement.

But then the skitty he got from the nice lady in New Bark Town is pouncing out from under his chair and onto the nearest little yellow orb and Lorenz is suddenly scrambling after him with a shout of protest.

"Mister Whiskers!!" Oh no. He doesn't want to let this little pink furball hurt the poor thing.

Someone... might want to help him out with this whole "battle" thing.

Femblemtroika House

There's so much to take in that he's reeling with the volume of information very quickly. So many people that he knows but in no meaningful way and the one he does has been here so long and there has been such distance between them that he feels as though he needs to learn him all over again.

It doesn't help him feel any less unmoored than he already does.

He finds himself returning to a seat near a window that overlooks the yard, a cup of tea cradled in his hands, Mister Whiskers slinking up onto the arm or back of the couch, moving with the sun. If left to his own devices Lorenz will spend much of the first few days nursing too much tea, staring into the middle distance, caught up in whatever strange turns his mind is taking. Sometimes a small leatherbound journal will appear from a pocket as well as a delicate glass dip pen. Though his mind seems to wander away from him and there are bold ink spots on both the page and his fingers before long.

Inevitably, when someone passes through the room, he looks up, seeming startled to find someone else nearby every time and though he is always polite, offering a greeting and asking after their wellbeing, there's something distinctly off putting about his response. A tension whenever he sees someone, something almost skittish in the way he holds himself, the way his grip tightens on his pen or his cup trembles ever so slightly.

He can hardly recall the last time he saw so many different people so often and so many of the faces here were far from welcoming when last he saw them.

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Lorenz blinks at Dimitri in surprise at first, not at all understanding how he could say there's anything about his behavior that Claude would be delighted by. But then the blond goes on explaining his reasoning and praising Lorenz for taking steps he'd never had the opportunity to before and by the time he looks up again Lorenz is blushing but still not looking at him. He shakes his head a little, trying to dismiss Dimitri's positive impression.

He absolutely does not deserve such praise.

"I- Thank you, Your Highness, but I fear you think far too charitably of me." There is clearly no good reason to excuse the kind of closed-minded thinking he has been struggling to correct for years now, for not realizing how wrong that was. For not realizing how wrong all of what his Father heaped upon him was. He'd been a puppet for far too long and there was no making up for that.

"My thoughts only come from what I see happening right before me," Dimitri says, a gentle rebuke, before he smiles. "I am afraid I am quite stubborn, so there is little chance of changing my mind on such a thing, I am afraid."

Lorenz is just going to have to deal with Dimitri thinking he is a good person. Dimitri can only hope that Lorenz walks away with the desire to continue doing such things, instead of thinking himself an imposter. Still, if he pushes too much on this, who knows how Lorenz would react.

So as he goes for another bit of tempura - brussell sprouts, maybe? - he nods to the soup. "Still, we are getting slightly off track from what I brought you here for. Does the soup suit your tastes?"

Lorenz starts to nod, realizes he hasn't taken a real bite of the soup, and then finally scoops up some of the vegetables to take a proper mouthful. It's really quite impressive, the vegetables are cooked perfectly, tender but not falling apart into mush like they so often do in stews. Then he finally bites into the smooth softness of a piece of tofu and blinks in surprise.

"It's quite good and- these little white cubes here, these are the tofu you mentioned, yes?" As he carefully plucks out two of the blocks with his spoon and puts them in his mouth, chewing ever so slightly. "The texture is divine, I must say."

Even though he cannot take any true pleasure in the ingenious design that is tofu, Dimitri still finds himself a little pleased nonetheless when he finds people who like it. Maybe that's just because of the strong association his mind has ended up making with Dedue - a fine cook who knows how to appreciate something like this, and likes vegetables or fish. It's a fine ingredient for such matters, apparently.

And if Lorenz is interested... It is better than being disinterested. Awareness and curiosity are healthy.

"That is right," he confirms. "Apparently, they are made from some sort of... almond milk? But they are much different than actual cheeses." No he doesn't know how almond milk works, do not ask him. "Apparently, they have a gift for taking in the flavors of whatever else they're cooked with. That makes them rather versatile."

Awareness has certainly not been a strong suit of his since arriving.... well... for a long time before that if he's perfectly honest. As the weeks had dragged on into months and it became more and more clear that he was more likely to end up taken down into the chambers beneath the estate than he was to be rescued by Claude or any of the other Deer time had gradually lost much of it's meaning. He had little to do but stare longingly out of windows, read and write, scribble out a thousand letters that would never be sent. Sanity slowly slipping away beneath the blanket of fear.

"Versatile, yes I suppose it would." Adaptable in a way. Though now that Dimitri has mentioned the fact it's made from some sort of... milk? The comparison to cheese is clearer in it's texture. He takes another spoonful of soup, savoring the richness of it without being heavy like a stew.

"This really is lovely, Your Highness." Another weak attempt at a smile. "Thank you... I... cannot recall the last time I had occasion to enjoy a meal like this.

Back in Derdriu surely, possibly even with Claude. But even he had not suspected his father of such villainy as what had kept him from returning to Claude's side and as such he had not truly appreciated the time he'd had.

On one hand, it has been five years since they were all able to take meals together in the same dining hall. Whatever else were in its many faults - the secrets it kept, the orders its leader gave, the snakes that slithered right into their midst - the dining hall of Garreg Mach was certainly pleasant in some ways. Dimitri knows that many people complimented its menu, and even he found the smells pleasant. Maybe not to the level of people's personal chefs, but enough to keep too many people from complaining. Five years of war would make it seem even better in ones memories.

But on the other hand... He's still been in Derdriu. He's still been with friends, surely, or family.

That he's not had a chance to enjoy a meal... Well, it explains his current condition, Dimitri supposes. That's by far not a good thing.

"Hopefully you will enjoy this one," he says, before he holds up his hand in such a way that Lorenz will get a good look at the way he's holding his chopsticks. "Do you want to try some of the fried vegetables now as well? I imagine they'll prove to be quite a good contrast alongside the soup, for when your mouth wishes for a change of texture."

Dimitri waits for a few moments, waiting for Lorenz to pick up the chopsticks again in order to mimic him. He even offers a few pointers and help, if it's needed.

It's after those few moments that he speaks up again. "You know, if this meal turns out to be something to your favor, perhaps we could go out again tomorrow for another meal elsewhere. There are many different foods in a city like this, I'm pleased to say. The citizens of Johto and Kanto are quite fond of new things - my own Kingdom could learn well from it."

Lorenz nods at the offer, setting aside that ingenious spoon to take up the chopsticks again. He is pretty good at getting his fingers into an approximation of the position he'd had before, only needing minor adjustments to his grip. Once done he picks up an almost lacy sort of disk, lifting it to very carefully take a bite of it. Which ends up being a bit more difficult than he anticipated.

For someone that tries to be dainty with his bites the tempura rather demands he take a larger bite than originally intended. Something that leaves him bashfully covering his mouth for while he crunches through the rather large piece in his mouth. Which is quite lovely, really. Light and airy and soft, not unlike potato but somehow... more. Which has him nodding his approval.

"We could all learn from such appreciation." Lorenz is quick to agree, eyeing the sauce for the vegetables curiously but unwilling to dip something he's already taken a bite of into it. "Though it is quite unnecessary to take me to another meal, Your Highness."

Because he can't help looking at it as Dimitri doing him a favor and not the blond using his inexperience as an excuse to go out and about trying more new things himself or enjoying bringing such experiences to others.

"Many things in life are unnecessary pleasures," Dimitri says idly, "and yet it is what makes life worth living to indulge in them, now and then. It is rather enjoyable to me, eating with another. With so many people doing so many different things within our residence, it can be somewhat difficult to find someone interested in dining together."

Another bite of tempura, before he pauses to survey what's left. He'll purposefully go slow, as if enjoying his food, he thinks. Mostly he doesn't want to eat too many and leave nothing for Lorenz.

And who knows? Maybe this will convince him into putting more weight into his words.

"Of course, I could understand if you have no interest in indulging such a selfish desire of mine." There, that should be it. Lorenz may not be as close to him as some of the others, but... Dimitri has noticed a trend that people respond well to demands when it's framed self-deprecatingly.

Lorenz has spent his life denying himself even the simplest of unnecessary pleasures, the idea of allowing such frivolous indulgence now simply because he's dead seems... strangely even more off putting. As though making such allowances now somehow negates the pains he went through for the last 24 years.

Still he watches Dimitri consider and rather than striking him as odd or something to be protested, that phrasing simply gets an understanding nod. Yes, of course. He is quite familiar with the subtle desires to make exceptions and allow oneself little pleasures like that but it is the duty of a man, especially one with such responsibilities as a noble, to discipline oneself against such lax behavior. Besides that, were Dimitri going to permit such an indulgence it should certainly not be for him.

"I'm certain there are others that would be far better suited to your company than myself, Your Highness." Not a denial precisely but they both know Dimitri would much prefer to have others at his side than Lorenz. "If that is your desire I will accompany you but... please, I insist. You need not make such arrangements for my sake."

...Hm. That's not the response he was hoping for, exactly. Dimitri wonders if he would have been able to do better, if he were more familiar with Lorenz. Would Claude have foreseen this kind of response instead?

Well, all he can do is live and learn, he supposes. Something to keep in mind for next time. Instead, it seems rather clear to him that at least Lorenz is not refusing him outright, and Dimitri can work with that much, at least. If anything, it's the least he can expect.

"Maybe that is so," Dimitri says, gesturing for Lorenz to take another piece of tempura, and try some of the sauce as well. "Still, you have not disappointed me as a dining partner, Lorenz. It has been pleasant, to see your reactions to a new food such as this. It is rather easy for me to imagine the future where I can hear more of your thoughts on the various cuisines and recipes in Johto."

"O-oh...." Lorenz actually freezes in the midst of picking up another vegetable, blinking across at Dimitri in surprise. The... uh... Crown Prince thinks he's an interesting dining partner? Oh.

For as subdued and uncertain as he's been since he arrived, and largely throughout their meal, Lorenz actually shifts from surprised to a soft, bashful smile despite himself. Possibly the first time he's smiled about anything that hasn't been directly Claude related in... longer than he cares to admit, really, and a light flush colors his cheeks.

"Well... if you'd enjoy such outings then... perhaps we will have to have a repeat." He finally finishes collecting that veggie, dipping it into the sauce, nibbling lightly only to make a pleased little sound and dip again, more heavily this time before he thinks better of it. Sorry Dimitri this sauce is too good not to use.

"Do you not care for the sauce?"

A smile! Dimitri bites down on his tongue a little bit, tucked away inside his mouth where Lorenz can't see it. Surely this is some sort of victory, and something he can report back to Claude about. Not only did he manage to get Lorenz to smile, but there is an agreement for more lunches in the future!

Wonderful. This way, they'll be able to rest soundly with the knowledge that at least Lorenz has one solid meal a day, and doesn't consist on tea alone.

"I would enjoy that," Dimitri says, and gives a low chuckle at Lorenz's reaction to the sauce. Truly, this particular restaurant has turned out to be more of a success than he could have anticipated. "And the sauce is fine. I simply enjoy the light cripsness of the vegetables on their own a bit more at times. It depends on my mood." Still, now that Lorenz has gotten a chance to enjoy himself, Dimitri dips in a vegetable of his own.

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[open] I don't want to be at the mercy of my emotions

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