Roaming on the endless prairie, writing an endless story

[brokencode]

Who: Angel and Krieg

Where: Ecruteak

When: Early January

Summary: After a "blessing" from Poke-santa, Angel decides to go home.

Rating: "P" for Pure.


[It felt like months since she had spent any time in Ecruteak. Though she'd passed through briefly on her way to Mahogany and Blackthorn thereafter, she'd tried to make the transition as quick as possible. The tiny little village held far too many memories, ones that she didn't want to dwell on in the wake of what she had done to her friend.

Now she stood outside the Pokemon center, scanning her surroundings nervously. Everywhere she looked seemed to hold a bittersweet memory. The last time they'd been there, they still had Athena at their sides, and Anders hadn't been sent back to the brutal place he called home.

Perhaps the coming reunion could bring some good memories back to the town.

Though Ecruteak was at least a little warmer than Blackthorn had been, and though Angel had bundled up, it hardly made a difference. She paced for a few seconds, trying to coax warmth back into her frozen bones, then stopped and looked around once more.

All the while, her fingers toyed nervously with the psycho mask in her hands.]

Comments

[fuelthefire]

[Krieg had been back in Ecruteak for a little while, now, only having had one warp jump to make in contrast to Angel's two. He was full of nervous, excited energy, a build-up of anticipation that couldn't be contained by the walls of the Pokemon center. He'd been in and out, in and out, for hours, no doubt driving the poor staff to distraction with his constant to-and-fro.

He's returning to the Center from an "out" when he sees a small figure, bundled up against the cold, standing outside. For a split second he's not sure it's who he's been waiting for, but then he sees the mask in her hands, and all doubt vanishes.

The only thing that prevents him from running the short distance to her side is the presence of Zen Doll, his new, little red shadow, waddling along at his feet. Slowly but surely the small monster has been coming out of its proverbial shell, but it still never lets him out of its sight, and even though he's impatient to be by her side, he holds back for the monster's sake.

So, Angel has plenty of time to spot him approaching before he silently and swiftly pulls her into his arms for a very long overdue hug.]

[brokencode]

[Unlike Krieg, the small siren didn't have any trouble identifying the figure approaching her. There was a lot she seemed to have forgotten in their month apart -- the warmth of his hugs, perhaps even the sound of his laugh -- but not his height

She tried to think of something to say to him as he drew closer. "I miss you" didn't seem to do her feelings justice. "I'm sorry" would never come close to being enough.

Thankfully, Krieg kept her from having to decide.

His arms around her sent a wave of nostalgia crashing through her, leaving her wondering as to how she could have ever forgotten the sensation at all. This was the one thing that always seemed to feel right, even when everything else was wrong.

Her joy lasted only seconds before giving way to grief. The image of Krieg, soundless and breathless, staining the ground red with his blood, planted itself firmly in her mind's eye. Even as she pulled herself tighter to him, closer to the heavy rise and fall of his chest, she failed to reassure herself.

It was only when a hard swallow disturbed the cold metal against her neck that she was able to calm herself. She'd warred with herself on whether or not to wear the collar -- knowing it had no purpose outside of a days out of the year. Now, she knew she'd made the right decision -- it was the only thing that would keep her relaxed around him for the time being.

Leaning back in his embrace, she lifted a hand and placed it against his cheek. Her thumb rubbed idly against the scar spanning across his cheeks, working once more to commit the pieces of her best friend to memory.

Hopefully, he would be distracted enough to not spot the relieved tears spilling from her eyes.]

[fuelthefire]

[This is what he's been longing for since he woke up - the reassurance of her presence, the small but fierce strength of her embrace, and the real, undeniable, physical proof that she's alive and safe.

Angel's not the only one getting all tearful - Krieg's actually looking pretty misty-eyed himself as he gazes back at her, taking in the sight of her beloved face - paler than he remembers - and the reappearance of the dark circles under her eyes. When she reaches up to touch his face, he leans into it despite the chill of her fingers.

When he finally speaks, his voice is ragged. Getting the words out around the tightness in his throat is difficult, and it's only partially due to the physical impediment.]

I made you cry.

[He hadn't heard her, hadn't seen her, but he knows. He had known as soon as he was awake enough to answer the doctor's questions. There had been the expected ones, of course - What happened? How do you feel? But there had also been, There were bloody hand prints on your face and shoulders. Do you have any idea why?

He had known why, but he had lied. At first he simply hadn't had the energy to explain. Once he had the energy, he had no desire to. He had hurt his best friend in the most painful, unforgivable way possible. He would die before telling a stranger. No wonder she hadn't come to see him. No wonder she waited for five days before responding to his message. He really was a monster. He didn't deserve her in the first place, and what he had done to her in the power plant proved it.

But for all his physical strength, he's still, somehow, impossibly weak. He knows she's better off without him in her life, but if, by some miracle, she'll forgive him, then...]

I'm sorry.

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Cry?

[It wasn't untrue. There had been many tears shed over what she had done to Krieg, both in the moment and afterward. Nearly every day, she'd found herself overwhelmed by the image of him lying prone, barely breathing and blood everywhere. That had been her doing, and it was something she had yet to come to grips with.

That didn't explain why Krieg was the one apologizing for it, though. It had been his decision to show up, his decision to stay, but ultimately the blame fell to her. It was by her hands, through her powers, that he met his end. If not for her lack of control, he would have lived on, and things might have gone an entirely different way.

No, there was no reason for her best friend to apologize. The only reason he should have looked so downcast was because of her own inability to keep herself together. And judging from the context, that wasn't the case.]

Krieg, no, that is...

[A cold hand seemed to grip her heart. With each choked beat, distressed chills worked their way through her. Every hair stood on end, and every nerve in her body seemed to light up. Guilt and grief tangled within each other, encasing her in their sticky web.

It was my fault she repeated mentally, as if somehow she could psychically convince the psycho to let go of his own guilt. There were many people, in both this world and the one they came from, that would have called him a monster. But Angel knew that if anyone was a monster, it was her. She couldn't even control herself long enough to protect her loved ones.

She let out a gasping breath, not realizing she'd been holding it in for nearly a minute. Each consecutive gasp, each attempt at catching her breath, quickly gave way to trembling, body wracking sobs.

When she spoke, it came out closer to a wail.

It was my fault. [She tried to suck in more air, shook her head, and then spoke once more.] I did this. I hurt you.

[fuelthefire]

[Oh no. Oh no, no no no nononono. He's done it again. His joy in seeing her again gives way to horror as she breaks down, as her entire slender body tremors with the force of her grief. Holding her as he already is, he can feel every violent shudder, every painful sob. What should he do? What can he do?

Just hold her. We can't fix this right now. Only time will make it hurt less.

It's a mixed bag of advice. He doesn't like the latter part - there has to be something that can be done now. But the former, he can do, and does, pulling her close again, leaning in and wrapping around her as if he can hide her from her demons with his mass.]

I didn't hate it. It's over now. I should have listened to you.

[His voice is uncharacteristically low and quiet as he forces the words out over his own tight throat and tumultuous emotions. Regret, shame, horror, sorrow...each distinctly sharp and forceful in its own way to a man who's never sorry, and that much more bitter and cutting because of it. Being the cause of Angel's tears is, to him, a fate far worse than death. From now on, anything he can do to avoid hurting her like this in the future, he will do.]

Please don't blame yourself.

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[A choked and bitter laugh erupted from her. He didn't hate it. As if that was somehow supposed to make things better. Sure, Krieg had an abnormal tolerance (and addiction) to pain, but that didn't absolve her what she had done.]

My anger should be the only result of you not listening to me. Not... [She motioned vaguely to him.] Not what I did.

[Nevertheless, Angel buried her face further against his skin. It felt wrong, letting herself get so close. She'd thought that the collar would make things easier -- that she could face what she'd done knowing that she couldn't make the same mistakes anymore. But the weight on her shoulders was still just as crushing, and Krieg's assurances were doing nothing for her.

Where Krieg was addicted to pain, though, she felt addicted to his presence. The idea of leaving, grief-stricken and guilty as she was, nauseated her. She'd promised Jack to return soon, knew that eventually she'd have to bear that weight.

But not yet.]

I can't... forgive myself, but... [She glanced up at him, eyes still dripping with tears.] I can at least promise that it will never happen again.

[fuelthefire]

[When she looks back up at him, eyes still overflowing with tears, he reaches up with one hand and gently, carefully brushes them away. It kills him to see her like this, crying and upset over him of all people, and suddenly it occurs to him that if she's feeling this way now, she was probably crying and upset over him while they were apart, too.

And suddenly her silence makes so much more sense.

And just like that he hates himself all the more.

But...

...Maybe it makes him selfish, but if he's going to be hating himself either way, he'd rather do it with her nearby.

They'll get through this. The bad times pass on into the past just like the good times. It just...takes time. And now they're together again, finally. He'll help her, and she'll help him, just like they've always done.]

I wasn't worried.

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You should be.

[Under better circumstances, her tone would have been firm and scolding. Forgiven or not, she was still dangerous under the right circumstances. A balance had to be struck, a solution found somewhere between both of their nuclear options. Krieg lingering was just as unsafe as Angel melting down and fleeing into the night, after all.

Perhaps given time, she might have been able to address the situation properly. At the moment though, she felt too raw and weary to even begin such a conversation. Not when it was bound to be contentious enough to cause a brief rift between them.

For the time being, she couldn't handle anymore fighting.]

How is everyone? Your Pokemon, the boys -- [Jean had mentioned seeing Krieg, hadn't he?] I have missed a lot.

[fuelthefire]

[He recognizes the deliberate subject change, but he goes along with it without an issue. It's better than getting into an argument, which was probably where their mutually self-flagellating conversation was going. She's here with him, finally, and she's safe. One thing he's been learning since being pulled to this funny little planet - immediate resolution to a tough situation isn't always possible, especially when there aren't any bullets to apply to it. It's an uncomfortable lesson. He still prefers to live as much as possible in the present, but he's been here long enough he's developed a past, and for some reason that's also made him more prone to considering what might happen in the future.

He and Angel have both had a stupidly horrible month apart. There's no reason to unpack everything all at once, right here and now. It can wait for a little while, and they can take their time.]

Mnn...Everyone's fat and happy.

[Well. Not fat but. You know. Well-fed, content, taken care of, that kind of thing.]

Oh!

[The gentle, deliberate weight of a small pokemon clinging to his pants leg while it waits for him to notice it finally catches his attention, and he somewhat reluctantly releases Angel (but not without one last little squeeze) to lean down and pick up Zen Doll.]

The Zen Doll's doing better!

[It still spends a lot of time staring vacantly at nothing, but it's also a little more active than it was in the hospital. Except when Krieg picks it up and holds it - it tends to go kind of limp, then, because it wants to be held and appears to have figured out that its dishrag routine encourages Krieg to hold it for longer.

It blinks its one good eye at Angel when Krieg holds it up for her to see, but doesn't react other than that.]