victory_road | we're halfway there~!

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we're halfway there~!

Who: The Residents of Second Chance Island & Friends
Where: The Sevii Islands
When: January
Summary: A catch-all log for shenanigans of meeting new people or anything else.
Rating: MOSTLY G -- but with added PG13/R for Krieg

Welcome to the Sevii Islands. Or, one of them, anyway. It looks a little like this, with a house a few hundred yards back from the actual beach. Flowers everywhere. A porch on the house... it's extremely peaceful.

Except for the Voltorbs rolling around. And the flexing Incineroars. A couple Aggron. Spheals rolling and bouncing in the water. There may even occasionally be a whale pokemon or two out in the water.

So yes. It's peaceful.

As long as you like Pokemon.

[ Here's an open log for anything you need in the month of January on the Island of Trauma, aka: second chance island. Tag around, toplevel, whatever, have a party! Train pokemon, go fishing, bum around the house Jean and Armin rented, just to keep things organized in one place. ]

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"Pfff! Does she headbutt him like that, too?"

God, he can picture it now. Giant, gentle Kuro, good-naturedly accepting a hundred tiny baby headbutts.

"All of mine are bigger and faster than Skully, too. Except the Zen Doll, but she won't play rough with him." She's a smart little baby, even if she is a big goofball - she already knows how much is too much. Ever since Day 1, Dolly has been exclusively for cuddle piles, and off limits for anything more rigorous than enthusiastic but gentle nuzzling.

And speaking of "faster," here comes Hermes the Hawlucha - old hat now that Skully's small sister has shown up, but not upset at being upstaged. He plops down on the sand next to Krieg to watch the baby Arons play, too.

"She sure does. Kuro falls over and lets her think she's beaten him, and then she crawls up on his chest and sits there." It is the cutest damn thing, Krieg, and hopefully she'll do it while you're still here.

Jean glances at Dolly, and nods. "They're a lot smarter than we give them credit for, I think." Strudel has been helping Maul and Wing Snake dig a pond out behind the house, but that tends to mean more frolicking and less working for the little Aron. Still, whenever Burrito and Nemesis come out to inspect it, she's the picture of good manners. It could be because Nemesis is so big, but Jean likes to think it's because Strudel recognizes that the two former Rocket Pokemon are different and is on her best behavior.

Jean nods at Hermes as he comes to join them, and is quiet for a moment, watching the babies play. There's been something weighing on his mind recently, but he doesn't have anyone to really ask about it, so... maybe Krieg would know?

"Krieg? Can I ask your advice on something?"

"Mnahahahahaha! Sounds like a show!"

Yeah, he's definitely looking forward to witnessing that. And also looking forward to seeing Skully's reaction to meeting Kuro in the first place - and also to introducing her to her dad. The island vacation is already shaping up to be awesome! So many Iron Skulls will make it one to remember for sure!

He goes quiet when Jean does, content to enjoy the baby Aron show and the company. When Jean speaks up again and asks his question, Krieg turns his head to look at him curiously. People don't tend to ask him for advice. There's usually always someone around who'd be better at it (and better for it), than him. It happens so infrequently, in fact, he can easily remember the last time someone had sought out his opinion on something...And one year later, after he'd told her Jack didn't deserve her forgiveness or her time, Angel is currently living in Blackthorn with him.

The sting of that particular raw wound is not the type he savors. He's glad Jean is here; it's so much easier to put it all out of his mind by focusing on his friend, instead.

"Yeah. What is it?"

Jean has thought long and hard about who to ask about this, and Krieg kept coming up as being the most likely candidate. He can't ask Armin or Bertolt, because they're just as clueless as he is; Shiro would mean well but is too dense about these sorts of things; Dr. Pines would make it really weird and uncomfortable; Anders isn't here anymore; Angel, Heather, and Gaige are girls, and cute girls, so therefore not a possibility. Of everyone he knows, Krieg is both the most trustworthy and the most worldly; Jean knows that Krieg will keep his mouth shut about what he has to ask, and while he doesn't seem too interested in this kind of stuff himself, he also doesn't seem completely oblivious about it either.

"I'm working at a coffee shop here on the island." Start with the easy stuff, the background info, while he digs around in his pocket for the piece of paper he knows is stashed there. "And sometimes customers come in who are, you know... cute. And stuff."

He finds what he's looking for and offers it to Krieg. "Two of them gave me this."

It's a Starmiebucks napkin, crumpled and bent from its ride in Jean's pocket. Scribbled on it are a pair of phone numbers, and two names: Jack and Diane.

"It wasn't Handsome Jack. Some other guy. With the same name." Who gave Jean his phone number. Along with his cute, female friend.

Krieg listens closely as Jean starts to explain, and watches curiously as he digs in his pockets for something. There's a weird, vague sense of deja vu which puzzles him as Jean talks, until the napkin is displayed for his inspection, and he sees the names and the numbers -

Holy shit, are we really this poor kid's best source for dating advice?

In a stunning turn of events, he's in complete agreement with the voice in his head, because that sure looks like where this request for advice is headed. He can almost hear Axton and Salvador chorusing at the sight of those numbers - Eeeeeeeey, threesome! Go get some! - and likely high-fiving. Which would probably cause Jean to die of embarrassment, so...eh, maybe there are worse choices.

But it seems just as weird that there aren't any better ones.

Well, he'll do his best.

"Okay." He nods. He's with you so far, Jean - tell him more!

There are definitely worse choices out there, and Krieg is already doing really well by listening patiently and letting Jean come around to the point of the story in his own time. And while Jean doesn't know that the voice in Krieg's head--the other Krieg, the one he met in a dream--is chiming in, he'd be glad to know that he's giving his opinion too. That's like advice from two uncles instead of one!

And please don't suggest threesomes. Or do, maybe. It'd make group sex a better association than hearing about it from Handsome Jack.

"So... what do I do with it?" Jean looks out over the water, because he suddenly can't look Krieg in the eye. "I mean, they said to call either one of them, but... I have no idea what to do here."

Krieg won't suggest threesomes. He's not even interested in one-on-one sexytimes, party sexytimes are right out.

"Mnn. Do you want to call one?"

That has to be why Jean's even asking, isn't it? If he didn't want to call, if he wasn't interested, surely he'd have just thrown the napkin away instead of hang on to it.

"Which one's cuter? Call that one."

There you go, Jean. There's your sage advice from a man with zero interest in dating and no memory of ever having done so.

"I... sort of?" Jean looks down at his napkin, bending it and folding it between his hands. He talks a lot about wanting to date and being interested in other people, but when it comes right down to it, he has no real experience, and nothing to draw on. He'd like to date, but he has no idea how; a lifetime of training to be a soldier leaves very little time for socializing, or learning about the simpler, sweeter things of life. "But what would I even say?"

He'll inevitably put his foot in his mouth, is the real problem here.

When Krieg asks which one is cuter, Jean goes a little pale, and takes his time in answering. They were both cute, but... "Jack has black hair."

And Jean kind of likes black hair.

Krieg does not understand why this is apparently so difficult.

"So call him. Ask if he wants to get coffee. Talk about the monsters. Ask if he has any. Show him your balls!"

Just, like, normal stuff? Like the kind of stuff he already does with his friends? Why is this so confusing? Would he know the answer to that if he could remember being a teenager?

...That sure is a weird thought.

He watches Jean carefully. It's a little disconcerting to see his normally cheerful, bordering-on-obnoxious buddy acting so quiet and uncertain. He really hopes he's giving usable advice. It's so bizarre to be in this position of reminding someone Do normal things the way you normally would.

Edited (Dees advice best advice) 2018-01-27 22:23 (UTC)

Did Krieg seriously just suggest that Jean...

Voltorbs. He means Voltorbs.

That... that makes a lot more sense.

"Right, but... but it's different."

It's different in ways Jean can't quite explain. If he just wanted to be friends with Jack? Yeah, he'd call him, they'd talk about Pokemon, go grab some coffee, whatever. There wouldn't be an expectation of anything more. It wouldn't be any different from Jean hanging out with Krieg or Shiro or whoever.

But Jean maybe wants to kiss this other guy, or maybe wants to kiss his cute female friend, but she didn't have black hair and so isn't as cute, and dammit, this should be a good problem to have!

"I mean, what do I do if he wants... other stuff?" Like, not friendly stuff? How is Jean supposed to deal with that?

...What the hell does Jean mean by "other stuff"?

Sex, probably.

Oh. Uhhhhhhhhhhh...

Just ask him to clarify. If the voice in his head had eyes to roll, he'd definitely be rolling his eyes.

"...What do you wanna do? D'you want to do other stuff, too?"

Like that?

Yeah, that's good.

"I... I don't know?" Jean spreads his hands out wide, frustrated with himself. How can he not know this stuff? This is like basic puberty here; either you want the sexy stuff or you don't. "Like, maybe? But how does it work with two guys?"

He laughs then, sounding startlingly close to Krieg's unhinged laughter when he wrestles muscle cats. "I don't even know how it works with a girl! How'm I supposed to figure it out with two guys?"

He's honestly a little surprised that his friend doesn't know "how it works". He's definitely past the age where most kids start getting some kind of sex ed...isn't he?

They probably don't expect child soldiers to live long enough to need to know any of that where he comes from. Teaching them's probably considered a waste of resources.

...Krieg never thought he'd be glad for so much input from the voice in his head, and yet, here they are. He's grateful for the perspective, and also glad that apparently the voice is just as invested in hearing Jean's woes and helping fix them as he is.

He reaches out when Jean lets out that awful laugh - not a good sound for his buddy - and drops his hand on Jean's shoulder. He's got you, friend, don't worry.

~~Jean should definitely be worried.~~

"Women have two holes." He holds up two fingers with his free hand. "Men have one." He holds up another finger, for a total of three, before dropping his hand back to Dolly's head. "You can stick your cock in any of 'em, but I think women like it better if you use the one made for it instead of the other one." He pauses, squints a bit as he gathers his many stray thoughts, and continues. "You don't have to use any of them though. You can use your mouth and your hands. Suck him off or rub her out. Or suck her off and rub him out. Sometimes that's better than rutting."

He pauses again, less to corral stray thoughts this time and more to check and see if Jean has any questions.

How's the lesson going so far?

Krieg and his voice are absolutely right about the attitude Jean's home world has towards their child soldiers; it's not something Jean himself has figured out yet, even if he has realized how they were used as cannon fodder in Trost and how the resettlement attempt was just to reduce the population. He's only recently had time, here in Pokemon land, to think about things like crushes and sex, and is still puzzling through it, not yet ready to realize why no one told him about it back home.

So Krieg's explanation, vulgar as it is, is something Jean has needed, and he listens with frightening intensity, storing all the little factoids away. "On women, the one made for it... if you don't want to get her pregnant, you've got to pull out, right? And, uh..." He makes a jacking off gesture with one hand. "Finish... somewhere else. Not inside."

He's learned that much, at least.

Jean is quiet for a moment, absorbing it all, before looking back up at Krieg. "Is it okay if you don't want to do that stuff right away? Will anyone think I'm a loser if I just... I don't want... want to kiss or something?"

"Nah, it's better to use a condom."

The Borderlands may not be good for a whole lot besides violent lawlessness, but even the bandits know to do the do safely. Or at least in an STI-avoidant manner. Sharing may be caring in a lot of instances, but everybody's happier without weird genital diseases, even if they can't avoid sucking chest wounds.

Krieg is quiet while Jean is, alternating between petting Dolly and looking out at the sparkling tropical ocean. When Jean starts talking again, he looks back. That's a good question, and one that doesn't require any thinking about before he answers, which is nice.

"Yeah, it's okay. It's okay if you never wanna do it. It's okay if you try it and don't like it. It's okay if you try it and like it a lot."

He'll probably have an easier time believing that if you give him an example.

He pauses when the voice speaks up again, looks away from Jean and back out over the ocean, and grumbles thoughtfully as he ponders the best way to put his thoughts into words. After a moment or two he looks back and adds, "I don't want to do any of it. Not interested. Do you think I'm a loser?"

Oh right. Condoms. Jean does know what those are; the talk in the barracks had specifically mentioned them, and some of the older cadets had confirmed their existence and what they were for. Jean assumes they'll be easy to find here... if he ever gets to that point with anyone, and if he can get past what is certain to be horrible Pokemon themes.

What Pokemon would they use to advertise condoms?

Jean visibly relaxes when Krieg affirms that it's okay if he doesn't want to jump right into the deep end of all this, and he wouldn't even need the personal example; he trusts that Krieg wouldn't bullshit him about this, and he doesn't even need to be talking to the Other Krieg, the one in his head, to know he's being genuine and honest right now. When the example does come, though, Jean looks like he's had a dash of cold water tossed in his face.

"You? You're not... you don't..." Jean gestures helplessly, his face reddening. "But... look at you!"

Krieg has a good body, is what he's trying to say here, and Jean is confident (perhaps overly so) that if Krieg were interested, he wouldn't have a hard time finding a willing and eager partner.

"But no." Jean is only flustered for a moment before he's shaking his head. "No. You're not a loser."

And Jean will fight anyone who tries to say Krieg is. Krieg is family.

Oh, Jean, you precious kid. Krieg almost laughs at how flustered he's become, but Jean gets over it so quickly and goes on to be so damned sincere that there's no room for mirth alongside the huge rush of affection triggered by that vehement response.

He expresses that affection with a heavy pat on Jean's back before raising his hand and dropping it to the kid's head to muss up his hair. And then, yeah, some laughter escapes.

"Mnuhuhuhu...Thanks, Sparky."

It's a true sign of how much Jean cares about Krieg that he isn't offended when Krieg musses his hair. What does he care, he's not going anywhere else today, and it's not like the Pokemon around here care too much about what his hair looks like.

"But... really?" Now Jean is curious, and peeks out from under Krieg's huge hand. "You're not interested at all?"

It's a revelation to learn that that's even an option.

He doesn't keep his hand on Jean's head very long after he's satisfied with the level mess he's applied to his hair, and moves it back to his knee.

"Nope. I'd rather snort a knife into my brain."

He's not speaking in hyperbole here; snorting a knife sounds like it would really hurt, and he's a sucker for physical pain. Physical pleasure? No thanks.

He grins a bit under his mask at Jean, and offers up another nugget of...whatever it is he's handing out today. It might actually be wisdom. Go figure.

"You don't have to figure it out right away, either. Take your time if you gotta."

It is definitely wisdom, and Jean has been soaking it up like a sponge. Maybe not the snorting a knife into the brain part, because that sounds really painful and also deadly, but everything else!

"I think I will." He looks down at the paper again, and draws a deep breath. Maybe he will call Jack. Maybe he won't. But it's nice to know that he's got a lot of options here, and that they're all equally valid and okay.

"Thank you, Krieg."

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we're halfway there~!

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For real this time

1/3

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balls are always the best choice

eeeeeyyyyyy

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