02 [video]

[whatsacactus]

[The video opens to Keith staring at the camera, outside in the sun with some kids screaming off camera. He looks back, then adjusts the camera to show balloons and tables of food and gifts. Keith himself looks a bit torn and ready to run.]

Uh. So....

Wanted to give a head's up, I might -- [He ducks as a small ball whizzes past over the camera from behind him.] Take a little longer getting back to the Islands than I thought? Got a little held up.

[There's a particularly louder scream off camera, and he turns to shout HEY! KNOCK IT OFF! Keith sighs and stares dead at the camera.]

...Any advice on kids?

Comments

Video;

[schachmeister]

[Armin opens the video to respond and just. Stares. Because that sure is. A thing. He is seeing.]

Keith.

[What is even going on. Where is he? Where did all these kids come from? Why?]

Why-- why are you surrounded by children?

video;

[whatsacactus]

Don't ask.

Just help.

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[schachmeister]

I- I don't think I'm out of line asking what happened.

[Please, Keith. A situation like this deserves an answer.]

And I don't really know anything about groups of kids. The only time I've ever dealt with groups of kids is when they were beating me up.

[Video]

[garbagechild]

Take the cake, and at least one balloon, and run.

_{[... is this kid's advice. Straight from the mouths of babes.]}

[Video]

[whatsacactus]

[While a tempting option, Keith isn't a total asshole.]

It's the kids', I'm not gonna do that.

[Video]

[garbagechild]

<sub>[Unlike Keith, Wrath is pure asshole in the form of a preteen.]

[He is, however, capable of reason.]</sub>

What if you left the cake and only took two balloons?

_{[That sounds pretty reasonable to him.]}

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[shiro2hero]

What -- where are you?

video;

[whatsacactus]

Still on the mainland outside Violet City.

video;

[shiro2hero]

That's... not quite what I meant.

What's happening over there?

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[haveyouseenalittlegirl]

I can try. I've raised a daughter.

[Twice.]

What's the situation and why are there screaming children with you?

Also yelling doesn't help matters.

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[whatsacactus]

Fifteen kids and no instruction for the afternoon.

[Why did he say he'd help with this.]

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[haveyouseenalittlegirl]

How old are they?

video;

[sassymaru]

Ahhh, in my experience, shouting at children seldom has any effect.

[Says the smug sonofabitch.]

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[whatsacactus]

If you're so sure about it, come help.

video;

[sassymaru]

Alas, we seem to be in wildly different locations, my unfortunately-haired friend.

Video

[lionroll]

[Hunk raises an eyebrow very, very high as he opens the gear to respond.]

Dude, why are you at a kid's birthday party?!

Video

[whatsacactus]

[Hi, Hunk, he hates this.]

Long story because I didn't ask questions first.

[islandshore]

I... geez.

[He's not sure whether to wince or to laugh. For now, he watches with a mixture of confusion and amusement on his face.]

I'd ask how, but I don't think that matters right now. Instead... just try to stay calm, I guess?

[...]

There anyone else who can back you up? Parents? Older siblings? Something like that?

[whatsacactus]

Oh, I'm calm.

[Keith.]

I'm just here alone doing this because they decided 'hey this guy's an adult, he can do this alone'!

[forsaintcecilia]

Kids are easy! You just gotta engage with them!

[whatsacactus]

How.

[He's a simple guy with simple questions.]

» video

[lordofthefries]

Give them candy?

[Kids like candy, right? And what else does Keith need more than crumbsnatchers hopped up on sugar?]

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[whatsacactus]

Think that's the last thing they need. Gotta be something else I can get them focused on.

After Keith is back.

[tookashirototheknee]

[A few days after Keith returns from his trip, Matt knocks on his door. At his feet are Kerberos, Mimi, and a couple other of his pokemon.]

Keith? Do you have a moment?

[whatsacactus]

[The room is still a decent mess of used mattress on the floor, things strewn here and there. But he's tried to make it as much 'his' as he can, with some books he picked up on the way, his bag and his own second set of clothes around.]</small. Yeah? Matt, come on in.