Handsome Jack - Hero of Pandora (
thedifferencebetween) wrote in
victory_road2019-04-07 01:42 pm
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Audio
Yeah, so...hey kiddos.
Quick question....
[It...sounds like Jack is at the beach? The sounds of the ocean are clear in the background. Jack also sounds a little out of breath. What the hell has he been doing?]
Fish Pokemon. Are any of them worth it? I only ask 'cause one of my Meowth just threw a monumentally stupid looking fish at me that isn't the other monumentally stupid looking fish I have.
And I mean it looks like the fish itself is stupid, the expression on its face is the kind you usually only see on heavily drugged old people. Or maybe it's blind, I dunno, it's got weird eyes with blobby blue pupils. It looks like something an apathetic designer at a bath toy company came up with. Here.
[Jack posts a photo of a Wishiwashi being held up for the 'gear camera.]
Anyway...keep it, throw it back, eat it...? What's the right move here.
Quick question....
[It...sounds like Jack is at the beach? The sounds of the ocean are clear in the background. Jack also sounds a little out of breath. What the hell has he been doing?]
Fish Pokemon. Are any of them worth it? I only ask 'cause one of my Meowth just threw a monumentally stupid looking fish at me that isn't the other monumentally stupid looking fish I have.
And I mean it looks like the fish itself is stupid, the expression on its face is the kind you usually only see on heavily drugged old people. Or maybe it's blind, I dunno, it's got weird eyes with blobby blue pupils. It looks like something an apathetic designer at a bath toy company came up with. Here.
[Jack posts a photo of a Wishiwashi being held up for the 'gear camera.]
Anyway...keep it, throw it back, eat it...? What's the right move here.
audio
The...the demon of the sea? Are you friggin serious? That's awesome! What's it turn into?
Look at that, you soulless eyed pizza topping, today is the first day of the rest of your new life!
audio
So it's small but you know how fish form schools to protect themselves in other worlds?
This one actually has a form called School Form. It's from it's ability and it just ...becomes a mass of fish pokemon that work together in the shape of a giant fish. Well a giant fish that sort of resembles a submarine monster. There's some pretty neat pictures out there.
audio
I mean...it makes absolutely no sense at all, but that's Pokemon, amirite?
It better not be impossible to train, like that other fish thing that turns into something badass.
audio
[And this is coming from Dipper 'I want to dedicate my life to solving mysteries' Pines.]
Hopefully not. That's the one that looks like it's dying constantly, right? Magikarp.
Actually....has anyone found out who names these things?
audio
Yes! Holy shit, yes! It does look like it's constantly dying! I've got one but hell if I've been able to do anything with it.
Kinda figured they just call them what they say. So I guess they name themselves. Which would explain a lot...
audio
[There are so many mysteries how do you not have any of them solved???]
Maybe it's one that doesn't like to fight? ....I mean they have to be able to, otherwise they'd never evolve into the lake monster like form they get later.
Yeah, but who decided to be like, wow this animal says a word. Let's call them all by that? You'd think a few of them would have names made up by people.
audio
Yeah, it doesn't seem to give a crap about anything. I want the cool dragon it turns into but I can't get the damn thing to get stronger.
I know I've got names for'em that I made up.... for some of'em anyway!
audio
[He still thinks it's weird.]
Do you know anyone else with one of those pokemon? Maybe they could figure out why yours doesn't want to fight and get stronger.
Really, what kind of names did you give them? Like scientific names, descriptive names?
audio
Um.
Descriptive.
Colorfully descriptive.
Too colorful for virgin ears.