victory_road | [006] - video (cw: drugs?)

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[006] - video (cw: drugs?)

~~[everett didn't you just post a thing like two weeks ago? shh this is important]~~

[Around 8 AM, a livestream gets posted to the network. There's some amount of fumbling as Egon tries to get the camera to stay still. When the PokéGear finally stabilizes, Egon takes a step back, adjusting his glasses and clearing his throat. Ray Stantz can be seen in the background with an excited expression on his face, as well as a Parasect resting on a nearby counter. A small chunk of the mushroom lip looks as if it has been cut off, though the Parasect doesn't seem to mind this.]

Good morning. I'm Dr. Egon Spengler, and I am here with Dr. Raymond Stantz and Amanita the Parasect to understand the affects of the mushrooms growing on a Parasect and/or Paras.

[He picks up a chunk of mushroom from behind the camera and holds it closely to the camera. The cap appears to be pink with dark yellow spots on it, while the gills appear to be a dark brown color.]

Now, as we know, this fungus enters an almost parasitic relationship with a Paras in its early life, and upon evolving, completely overtakes the host and acts as the "brain" of the entire creature. If the mushroom is removed from the Parasect, the creature ceases movement entirely. These mushrooms release poisonous spores, but these spores can be steeps and boiled to remove their toxicity and are used in some traditional medicines.

[He places the mushroom next to Amanita, who barely reacts. She simply continues to stare unblinkingly at the wall.]

Today, we are going to be observing what effects these mushrooms have upon human beings upon being ingested in their base forms. Our hopes is that these fungi may be able to mitigate physical pain. We will be recording this in order to further analyze whatever data we collect after the experiment has concluded. Ray and I will both be ingesting approximately 500 milligrams of fungi each.

[Egon picks up his piece of mushroom, and Ray does likewise. Ray grins, giving Egon a thumbs up.]

You ready, Egie?

Ready.

[They both eat the mushrooms and wait for the effects to settle in. The initial reactions are quite boring, with Egon droning on about fungi reproduction and how mushrooms have been used in medicine in his dimension and Ray playing with Amanita and occasionally interjecting his tidbits and facts into Egon's lecture.

About an hour later, however, things have...definitely changed up a little.]

Ray. [Egon stares down at Amanita, holding her gently in his arms. The mushroom crab makes a chittering noise.] The fungi think your hair looks nice, and they want to--

[Spengler trails off, still staring at Amanita. Ray glances over at Egon, surprised.] Want to...?

[No reply. Ray lets out a groan, sprawling across his seat.]

Spengs, I'm upset. Why won't the mushrooms talk to me like they talk to you?

They love me more. Maybe if you spent as much time cultivating spores as I did...you'd learn.

[It's amazing neither of them have died yet from their stupid science shenanigans.]

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[... He's not even gonna try to figure out what Ray's talking about. Venkman shakes his head and sits down on the couch beside Ray, leaving Egon by the door.]

Nah. I gotta make sure neither of you get freak out too badly. I'll be the sober one this time.

Plus the last time I took shrooms back home, I got sleep paralysis, and I'm not going through that again.

[Ray almost instantly leans up against Venkman, thankful that he's not dead.]

I don't freak out. The ghosts here won't go for me.

You, however...

[Egon stays by the door. When he thinks Venkman isn't looking, Egon goes right back to staring at his hands.

He does, however, chime into the conversation.]

Sleep paralysis demons. Difficult to tell which are real demons or spirits and which are created by the mind. Like the Boogieman.

Why would ghosts go for me, Ray? We all know you're the possession-prone one.

Yeah, yeah. This was sleep paralysis, though- I know a real ghost when I see one. And the other Egon's PKE meter didn't go off.

[He watches Egon for a moment.]

Spengs, sit down and stop staring at your hands.

[Suddenly, Ray grabs Venkman’s shoulder, with a grave look on his face.]

Pete.

What if I’m possessed right now?

[There's a brief pause before Egon responds again.]

I can't do that, Peter. What if I miss something vitally important?

...I'd also offer my PKE meter, but I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to hold it.

[Without missing a beat:]

If you were possessed, the ghost possessing you wouldn't ask that question. It'd be raiseing unnecessary suspicion. But since you probably won't believe that..

[He disentangles himself from Ray's grip, grabs Egon by the shoulders, and gently shepherds him over to the couch and makes him sit down. He then pulls the PKE Meter from Egon's pocket.

Look, you wanna teach a kid that the Boogieman isn't under their bed, you check it for monsters; you wanna teach a stoned parapsychologist that he's not possessed, you wave the PKE Meter over him and show him that there's no activity.]

See? There's nothing. Just...

[Venkman trails off slowly as the PKE Meter's beeping turns erratic. He quickly switches it off, but the damage is probably already done.

Something is in the room.]

[Yeah too late, Venkman, Ray sees that and immediately clings to him, starting to cry.]

I knew it.

I'm sorry guys but you'll have to kill me. It's for the best.

We won't have to kill you, Ray. We'll just douse you in mood slime and you'll be fine.

[He does manage to look away from his hands after the PKE meter goes off. He leaps forward to grab it from Venkman.]

Give it to me. We must find the ghost responsible for-- [Waves his hands at Venkman.] --this.

[The words "mood slime" almost make Venkman say something that's both really fucking stupid and that absolutely should not be said on a live podcast in the Pokemon world[A livestream that Venkman still doesn't know about, mind you]. But Ray holding him and begging to be murdered just barely distracts Venkman long enough for him to not say the first thing that came to mind. Ray Stantz is a goddamn hero.

Venkman rolls his eyes a bit but pats Ray on the back. He hands over the PKE meter without thinking about it.]

You're not possessed, you idiot.

Ok, first question- did either of you have any Ghost, Dark, or Psychic type Pokemon out of their containment units? Second question, what's the range this thing set to, 'cause it could just be picking up a Pokemon from an adjacent room.

[Ray relaxes a little, but still clings tightly to Venkman, nuzzling him a little.]

Does my love for you count as Pokemon out of their containment unit?

[... So no.]

[Egon doesn't respond to Venkman's question. He has no Pokémon out right now, save for the Mimikyu egg, but that's not important right now. What's important is that Egon now has the PKE meter, and he's turning one of the dials down. Whether or not he actually understands it in his current state is the real question.]

It has a three hundred meter radius, but I'll restrict the area to this room.

[He carefully looks up and stares at Venkman. He moves as if to poke him, but then hesitates when he catches sight of his hand and decides against it.]

Perhaps...Venkman is possessed.

[Venkman has no owned Pokemon out of their containment units. The wild Spiritomb that's been hanging out in the bottom of his bag for the past few weeks, however... It shivers a little, and silently hopes that it doesn't get found out.]

No, Ray. Love is not a ghost. No matter how much you may want it to be.

[He just. Sighs.]

Egon, remember that time you had a bad high and decided to perform an exorcism on me while I was asleep? And the fire department had to be called because you set the apartment on fire? Because I do. And I'm not doing that again.

None of us are possessed.

What if I truly believe love can be a ghost?

[He pauses for an uncomfortably long time, staring at Egon.]

And I don't mind Egie performing an exorcism on me.

Please, Ray, not in front of the camera. We can demonstrate how to perform a successful exorcism later.

[He frowns, still staring at the PKE meter, which keeps beeping erratically and shows...something in the room.]

If none of us are possessed, why does the PKE meter show that--

[He lets out a sudden yelp as he lets go of the PKE meter, allowing it to fall to the ground. As expected, it makes a dull CRUNCH as it splinters apart into several pieces. The beeping stops. Egon stares at the ground, then at his hands. He rubs the heel of his hand against his jacket and shoves them back in his pockets.]

They were going to steal it.

In front of the-

[Venkman reels back a bit.]

Ok, is that just paranoia, or are you actually recording this?

[Both have happened before.

The PKE meter shatters, and Venkman watches it fall with a sort of resigned exhaustion. Goddamnit. Why did he give it back to Egon, again?

Venkman pries himself from Ray's grip and starts to search the room around Egon and the shattered meter.]

The meter was leading you this way, right?

[Ray lets out a quiet "nooooo" as Venkman pries himself away.]

We're performing an experiment.

Of course we're recording it.

[Using the crook of his elbow, Egon gestures to the PokeGear being propped up on a bunch of books. He follows after Venkman, then hesitates. He turns around towards Venkman's bag, and then....heads towards the door.]

I believe I still had the Mimikyu egg...outside. But previous attempts to scan Pokémon eggs have turned up little to no psychokinetic activity. Perhaps it's hatched already?

You've- oh God. Who's watching this? How many people are watching this??

[He doesn't need to spend all day tomorrow doing damage control for whatever his partners do while high on a public live broadcast.]

Great. So Kirby's kids' first impressions of you guys will be of you high on shrooms. Yeah, that's not gonna make you any more endearing to her, Spengs.

Edited 2019-04-15 02:47 (UTC)

All of them. We need a reference for this

[Ugh okay lets stand up. Ray seems wobbly as he tries to walk to the others.]

Our children will know how scientifically minded we are! It’ll be great.

[Egon nudges the door open with his foot and gestures to the egg leaning against one of the pillows. All the while keeping his hands in his pockets. The egg seems to be wiggling ever so slightly. Egon makes his way over and sits down next to it.]

See? It's right here--

[The egg is engulfed in a corona of blinding light. Egon lets out a yelp, jumping back as a form begins to take shape. When the light begins to fade, a Mimikyu is left standing there, shaking off shards of egg shells.

It blinks, then lets out a small hiss before hiding behind Egon's back. Egon hesitates, then holds out a hand for it. A single, shadowy claw reaches out and grabs his pinky.]

Ah.

[The hatching is just enough to distract Venkman from the whole "they're being watched by god knows how many people on the network" thing.]

... So they are born with the cloaks.

[He crouches down on the floor beside the newborn.]

Hey, kid. I'm sorry your dad's an idiot. Or- the human dad? Your bio dad is AWOL, I dunno if he's an idiot or not. Your mom's cool though.

[Just as Ray makes it to the doorway there is another blinding flash of light. When the light fades, there is another Mimikyu. She stares at the trio for a few moments, before making a squeaking sound of delight and runs toward them, looking up at them in excitement and adoration.

Well. These siblings are different.

Ray, meanwhile:]

Venkie.

You didn't tell me Kirby could clone herself.

[Yeah he's useless.]

[Egon's Mimikyu takes one look at the other Mimikyu running towards him and lets out a startled hiss, his claws digging into Egon's pinky instinctively before he scuttles under Egon's jacket for safety. Egon winces.]

Don't--Don't do that, the mushrooms will spread.

[His brain is working overtime to process what, exactly, is going on. He scoops up the baby Mimikyu in his arms, careful not to touch him with his hands.]

But eggs don't produce PKE, and they clearly hadn't hatched until now. So...the source...must be somewhere else, right?

She-

... Yeah, Ray, sure. She cloned herself. Had no idea she knew how to do that until this moment.

[Hell. Venkman pulls out Kirby's containment unit and lets her out- might as well just make this a little family reunion. Kirby hisses immediately at the sight of Egon, but within seconds her demeanor changes. She starts chattering excitedly, waving her shadow-y tendrils and reaching for her children.]

I dunno. Maybe since they were so close to hatching, the meter picked up on them?

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