victory_road | [Track 1]: Route 29 || video

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[Track 1]: Route 29 || video

--Oh, hey, it records!

[There's a pale, black-haired young woman on the network today, inspecting her new 'Gear. She has a little Noibat chilling in her mass of hair like an adorable bat-shaped barrette. She studies the Pokegear seriously for a moment or two before noticing something else:]

Oh snap, and it broadcasts! Sweet!

Hey! Barkeep guy! You were right, that Mom lady was really weird! She gave me a lot of snacks, though, so that's cool.

But, uh, I kind of. Already ate them all? Look, I got carried away, okay? Does anyone know if there's anything else to eat on, what is it, Route 29? Besides the berries, I mean. My girl here - [she gestures to her new Noibat pal] - really digs them buuuuuut I still think they seem kinda suspect. For me to eat, that is. Thanks, peeps!

[Marceline: Out!]

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Hmmmm...Three days is a long time to be hungry. I guess going back and starting over wouldn't be too bad.

...Do you think that Mom lady would be down to hand out more freebies, or is she locked away in that house forever, now?

Sadly, 'Mother' cares little for us once we leave her home. Not only does she lock herself away, but her neighbors react poorly to forceful attempted visits. They're unlikely to offer food of their own, too.

...That's so weird. How come everyone else I've met is so nice?

Is there like, a cult in New Bark? The Cult of the Mom? Mom Cult?

According to the rumors, she once had a child that went missing and has been... different, since then. I cannot blame them for wanting to keep her safe.

[A beat.]

Or it could be related to that one newcomer who tried to set the town on fire. That'd hardly surprise me.

[Okay, a rumor about someone's missing child is sad, for sure, but it's also just a rumor. It actually sounds like the attempted arson was a verifiable event.]

...Someone tried to set that nice little town on fire? Seriously? What happened to them?

...You know, I'm not certain. I cannot quite recall if they were the same person who attacked townspeople and were pursued by the local law enforcement... but I can assure you that no one's tried that again.

[Well, the 'burning a town' part. Attacking people is a long-standing Team Rocket tradition.]

I'd sure hope not, jeez. That mom lady was weird but she seems harmless. And everyone else in town was nice.

Do you think whoever did it is like, in Pokemon Prison? Or do you think whoever or whatever yanks people here gave them the boot back out?

While most sentences involve community service rather than prison, such a crime would demand imprisonment. That said, whoever did it disappeared a long time ago. Whether or not Arceus sped that up, I could not say.

....Okay, who's Arceus?

The closest this world has to a god, more powerful than any other Legendary Pokémon.

[A beat.]

It's a big white llama.

[Another beat.]

It may or may not be responsible for our presence here, and it likes sandwiches.

I mean...that lines up pretty well with everything I've seen about this place so far.

[It's more or less the same level of "weird" she's used to back home, though dressed up differently. Despite that, it still feels pretty homey.]

Though I won't lie, I definitely want to know how you know it likes sandwiches.

After asking us to participate in a battle that nearly ended the world, it stayed long enough to answer a few questions. And to accept any snack we could offer.

[Honestly, he's not quite sure there was anything it didn't like.]

You know what? Fair. Food is really excellent.

[....Wait.]

What was that about world ending, though? How'd the stakes get that high? This place seems way too chill for world-ending battles.

It may be a generally peaceful land, but it still has its share of criminal groups and terrifyingly powerful Legendaries. When two opposing criminal groups manage to take control of two opposing Legendaries... the results are not pretty.

[She can't help it, she snickers a little at that description.]

Wow, that sounds like something out of a Saturday morning kids' cartoon.

The criminals staging a world-ending battle, not the actual almost-end-of-the-world.

But since I'm here talking to you, I'm guessing everything worked out in the end, right?

It did, thanks to everyone's efforts. There was some damage to the battlefield, but it was far less extensive than the destruction that would have occurred otherwise.

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[Track 1]: Route 29 || video

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