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[whymustifeel]

[Hello, network. You're about to get a grand total of 17 back to back image uploads.

The first several shots are exceedingly blurry, but the intrepid cameraman appears to have improved his technique over time. The focus of every single image?

A very flat, gray pancake with green splotches and what looks like a Pokeball squished in the middle. Kind of weird, but- wait, it's got eyes. And spikes. And teeth.]

I GOT A LIVING BEAR TRAP FOR CHRISTMAS

THIS IS THE BEST GIFT EVER

I CAN FINALLY USE BEAR TRAPS IN MY SCHEMATICS AGAIN!!!

[This is quite possibly the most excited anyone has ever been for a Stunfisk. Which is less of a dig at Stunfisk and more of a comment on how god damn ecstatic Fred is right now.]

Comments

[cyclonely]

does the pokemon world not have anything that can be used as a bear trap?

i guess people probably just fight pokebears with other pokemon, actually, that makes sense.

are your traps supposed to really mess people up? bear traps seem like a pretty deadly inclusion! uh...you are the guy who was setting all the traps at the evil labs while dressed like a cartoon dude, right? i can't think of anyone else this excited for traps and i know a lot of weird people.

[whymustifeel]

This place is really weird about weapons, and I guess they don't want to possibly promote violence against Pokemon, so I haven't been able to find bear traps or anything similar.

Well, not necessarily "mess people up", they're just really useful for holding things in place, so they're perfect for catching criminals!

... Cartoon dude?

[cyclonely]

oh yeah...i noticed that. i guess the idea is that if you have a dog that can cause a nuclear blast or something, weapons aren't really necessary? i don't know how sure i am about that but it's mostly pretty peaceful!

don't they have huge pinchy teeth that break your leg? i will admit i don't know that much about bear traps but they are for trapping bears, which are pretty durable!

anyway, sorry, i assumed you were cosplaying. i guess it is just a coincidence? your outfit reminded me a lot of that one scooby doo guy, the one who makes decisions?

finally

[whymustifeel]

I know, but it's not fair. I'm not gonna use weapons to hurt anyone, just to keep other people from hurting someone!

[There's a long pause before Fred responds to the latter message.]

How do you know my friend's dog's name??

8D

[cyclonely]

i know what you mean! it feels weird not having any choice but to leave everything to pokemon to do. almost like i am taking advantage of them. maybe if you work things out so your spiky pancakemon only acts in self defense it might be ok!

[What? Everyone knows that name, probably!]

i mean it is a pretty easy name to remember!

wait.

is this another ghostbusters situation?

[whymustifeel]

Exactly! I hate that I just have to stand by and basically just order my Pokemon to do all the work for me. I want to get in on the action, too! It's not fair to my Pokemon to just have them do everything.

I guess it is pretty memorable, but where'd you hear the name before? What's the Ghostbusters situation?

[cyclonely]

i think it is all about waiting for the right moment when you can do things and have them be fine in the situation. or when a jenny is not watching, haha.



ok so the ghostbusters situation is one where i have been a fan of their franchise for years and they are real people here, i assume because it is a video game world so everyone might as well be real? i guess i did teleport into con air once, which has got to mean that everything is real somewhere.

it's crazy to think about! con air doesn't make any sense at all--i mean, it's FUN, it's just got lots of dumb people making dumb choices, so it is strange to think about it being a real place where people do those things for real, and it is just normal to have a really terrible southern accent in real life.

what i am basically saying is that i know you and your friend's dog from a franchise.

1/2

[whymustifeel]

What?

2/2

[whymustifeel]

[Then, after a significant pause:]

I think you're confused. I don't know what you're talking about with Con Air and all that other stuff... Maybe you're thinking of a different Scooby Doo? I didn't think it was that popular of a name, but it could be a really cool coincidence! Our Scooby's a Great Dane.

[Is it a good thing or not that Fred's just a bit too stupid to really wrap his head around this? Hard to tell. At least he's not having an existential crisis.]

[cyclonely]

[John doesn't even parse it as Fred being too stupid. He's used to Jake and, well, alright, himself, both men who pretend they're too dumb to get things when they just don't want to deal with them. So that's fine, there's no reason to push for the conversation. It started by accident anyway.

He is picking up what you are putting down, Fred!]

you're right! it is probably just a popular great dane name. maybe frank sinatra liked great danes a bunch? i never heard about that from dad but it is probably true.