004 / text (backdated to earlier in the month)

[neverstudied]

so like. little over half a year ago ray got me an alolan meowth egg. we all probably know what an alolan meowth looks like- dark gray kitten with a coin on its head and an attitude. mostly looks like a normal cat yknow. its fine

then a couple months later he got me a normal meowth and we all definitely know what that looks like. just a kinda cream color cat with brown paws and a coin on its head. also looks mostly like a cat. and they both look pretty similar to each other right

so can someone please tell me why the pokedex is telling me the egg i got from that legendary hatched into a meowth when it looks like this

[Enclosed is two photos of fluffy little gremlin with sharp fangs and, yes, a coin on its head. Venkman appears to be gingerly holding it by the scruff. In the first image, it appears to be snarling at the camera, one forepaw lifted as if it's about to strike out at the trainer holding it. The second photo is taken from the back. The image is slightly blurrier, as the Galarian Meowth has contorted itself into latching onto Venkman's arm and appears to be in the process of clawing him to pieces.]

this is not a fucking cat this is a tumbleweed with teeth. this is a walking beard with an attitude problem. and its made of STEEL

Comments

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[ghoststanning]

[Venkman will very soon get a text. Never mind they live in the same place, Ray needs everyone to see his opinion on their new daughter.]

Be nice to her, Peter! 😭❤😿 She's perfect and I will not let you mock our babies like this! 😠👊

[neverstudied]

ill be nice to her when she stops clawing me into raw hamburger meat ray

until then i have the right to say whatever i want about her

[ghoststanning]

She's learning! 🎒 You should use positive reinforcement to encourage her to scratch something that's not you! 😸💖😒

I can help if you want! 🤝 You know Pokemon have a natural affinity for me anyway. 😉

[neverstudied]

i know what positive reinforcement is, lets remember who the psychologist is here

and if i can even get her to the point where she'll think about scratching something thats not me, i'll be sure to keep it in mind

but right now i have three winter coats that she's sliced through like tissue paper and two bleeding arms

if you wanna volunteer to be her newest scratching post be my guest

[ghoststanning]

I will happily volunteer! ✋

... Wait do you mean you own three winter coats or did she claw through most of our coats? 🤔🧥

[Because that's... less good.]

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[shiro2hero]

That's no Meowth

[neverstudied]

its a nightmare is what it is

a nightmare with a beard

[shiro2hero]

Maybe

Maybe your 'gear is malfunctioning.

That can't be a Meowth

[neverstudied]

i dont know

i mean i guess it has the coin on its head?? is that the only criteria for a meowth

a fucking coin?

[shiro2hero]

May... be?

It doesn't even look like the others' coins though...

[cyclonely]

ok this is all very fair, but you have to be aware that your last description was just you describing a cat.

[neverstudied]

i dont think cats are normally literally made of steel my man

but then again im no expert on animal biology

all my other cats are relatively fine though, attitude-wise. i dont know what made this one such a bastard right from the moment it was born

[cyclonely]

it IS a poke cat.

anyway cats are random. sometimes they are nice friends who want you to pet them and sometimes they are little assholes who want to bite you and give you a gross infection and you end up not being able to use your right hand for a week.

try giving it a steel scratching post, i don't know. i am not really a cat person.

[neverstudied]

believe me, i know. out of the six cats ive managed to get in this dimension only like 3 of them are actually friendly

if we had a permanent place to live i'd invest in a couple thousand scratching posts at this point, but it'd be pretty annoying to pack them all up every time we move on to another town

[cyclonely]

do you guys travel a lot?

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[pkemeter]

Another Meowth? At this point, some experts would describe this as a cat hoarding problem.

However, that being said, there are definitely a few species of cat that share similar rugged appearances--Maine Coons, Persians, Siberians, and Norwegian Forest cats.

[neverstudied]

hey like i said in the post: i didnt TRY to get any of these meowth. i just keep getting them handed to me

and at least hoarding cats is better than hoarding shrooms

i know fluffy cats exist but egon i dont believe you understand the fact that this is literally a beard made of iron fur. most of her body has short fur and shes just got a fucking viking beard

[pkemeter]

[Just ignoring the hoarding shrooms comment to plow forward.]

Iron fur? Intriguing. Did you measure the density of the fur, itself, to confirm this?

I would like to examine her as soon as possible. Where are you right now?

[neverstudied]

measuring shit like that is your job, so no. its in the pokedex. also her fur is hard as hell if you pet it wrong. not that im able to pet her much in the first place

im at the apartment where do you think. im not taking this murder goblin in public

[pkemeter]

So you're saying that it's barbed? Intriguing. Stay right there, I'll be at the apartment in fifteen minutes.

[And he is! He bursts through the door with something that looks like a sea urchin perched on his shoulder. A big, foot-long sea urchin. He glances around the room, looking for the cat.]

Where is it?

[text]

[captainash]

Cat breeders have a long history of selecting weird and often unhealthy traits to pass on to their litters, so I'm honestly not surprised by the walking beard.

Except maybe the steel part.

[neverstudied]

according the pokedex theyre associated with "seafaring people" so i guess we've got sailors to blame for this one. i have no idea why they went with "cat with a beard that reaches the floor" though. whats appealing or useful about this

[captainash]

The only reason I can think of is using them to sweep the decks. Which perhaps not the worst theory, but it doesn't strike me as likely.

Or maybe their razors sucked, and they just wanted cats that matched them.

[neverstudied]

can you fucking imagine

swabbing the decks with a life animal

jesus

though i guess the fur could work as steel wool in a pinch

hell maybe the cats grew the beards just to look more like their owners. who knows

[captainash]

The locals do everything else with animals, so what's one more act that would get them arrested in other worlds?

But maybe they just shaved them in the spring and use that fur for the rest of the year.

Or they really were imitating humans. Yeah, I like that one better.