[video]

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

[Sup, poke-vets and poke-newbs. It looks like Route 30! But who the fuck can really tell since all the forests look the same and has Church ever told you that it's stupid that there aren't any roads? Because it's ridiculous that there aren't any roads. Less ridiculous are the fallen trees. Man that sure does suck. If only he had a pokemon that could do anything about it.

But that's not the part he's focused on. No, the camera swings this way, then the other way, then down to a top percentage Rattata that keeps running up and tugging on his pants and running off. Church follows until he's lost sight of the thing, which then comes to find him again. Faintly, there's a small voice in the distance...somewhere.]

Hey guys? I think Timmy's fallen down a well, cuz Lassie here's being preeeeetty persistent about leading me on--HEY! HEY CAN YOU HEAR ME? ...I know we can't get any, like, emergency vehicles out here or anything, but like, I don't know if I'll be equipped to pull someone out of a well. Or out from under a tree? I don't want to see Timmy trapped under a tree. Crush injuries are pretty bad--

Okay, hold on, ignore me, because maybe he just skinned his knee on a rock, I dunno, rats can't talk back. I'm just--I'm just saying--shit the little asshole's fast, whew--I might need some assistance? Like. Medical? Or. Airlifting? Or something. I'll uh. Let you know?

Comments

[ratherbelocky]

Never would've said you were.

[Out loud.]

Anyway, he's gotta be lower-level than the girl in the second gym, and she wasn't that bad. [You know. From a Freelancer perspective.] I know he fights with Flying-types. Your Pokéball guy is an Electric-type, right? He'll do well against those.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

...Guess it makes sense that lightning would be bad on those who can fly around. [church do you even know anything about type strengths and weaknesses] Y'know what's still weird? This computer thing is still weird. I find it super unfair that I can't carry all of the ones I catch with me. Shouldn't I have all my potential firepower with me?

[ratherbelocky]

Come on, man, it builds character. Teaches you...flexibility or something. Planning? Something like that. Do you really have that many?

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

I mean I've got a couple zapped off to the computer... Like. A big rock dinosaur? I guess I caught that when I was...less me. But it looks bitchin'. And I have a blob that transforms into whatever the fuck it wants? That one can stay, as far as I'm concerned right now. And...a couple others.

Like what about breeders? Is it like...so long as you don't catch them in a ball, they can just chill out with you all day?

[ratherbelocky]

Naw, we've got the six-at-a-time restriction, too, except that the three of us are renting a house. So long as they're on our property, we can have more than six hanging out, I think. The limitation must be a travel thing.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

Shit, right, I forgot there were three of you in a place. That must get nuts. How do you even wrangle them all?

[ratherbelocky]

Would you believe discipline and a firm hand?

[Pfffttt, nah.]

A few of ours are old enough and smart enough to give us a hand with the others. I think the worst was when North and I got egg clutches at the same time, though. The living room was all over eggs, I tell ya.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

[Right. One of the people York lives with is North. That's not...awkward. Or anything.] Do...they all lay eggs? Not just birds?

[ratherbelocky]

They all lay eggs. Not just birds. Which is actually sort of a blessing, if you think about it.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

But they aren't--........oh, damn. EW. Okay, I...see your point.

...All of them, though? What about the ones that are...electroballs or swords or pinecones?

[ratherbelocky]

[YEAH YORK ISN'T REALLY HERE TO HELP DRAGONS THROUGH THE MIRACLE OF BIRTH...]

Uh, I think there are some that don't breed? And there are some you can only breed with a--hey, you said you had a transforming blob? That thing can breed with pretty much anything, so keep an eye on it.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

..........I

wh

that's not--that doesn't make--

.......the fuck.

[ratherbelocky]

At some point I just kinda stopped questioning things. Gets you in trouble, questions.

[motherfucking_ghosttype]

Questions just mostly lead to a lot of frustrating terrible answers from dumbasses.