Video | Backdated to the 31st

[rollstoseduce]

[It's the evening of the 31st and after three very busy weeks, Jaskier is finally leaving Goldenrod! Yet he isn't recording this at a route, he's at some room? A moving room. The background noise will tell you this is a private car in the Magnet Train, because this bard and his witcher are leaving for Kanto! Since it's warm inside the cabin, Jaskier's ditched his cloak and he's lounging around in a simple cardigan and shirt. Rings decorate the fingers currently holding a teacup, and on the table in front of him where the Pokégear stands recording, there's a plate with delicate pastries, the teapot... and little a cushion. A cushion where Regina the Ducklett is currently sleeping while wearing the golden ribbon they won at the contest.

Yes, Jaskier is showing off. Yes, his ego is too big for his own good. No, he doesn't care. Sue him.]

We've been in this realm for two months yet its scientific achievements continue to amaze me. [He speaks while looking through the window at the passing scenery.] A cart that needs no horse or magic! Faster than a wyvern! As noisy as one, as well, but that's a price I'm willing to pay in exchange for these comforts. They said we'd arrive at the neighbor kingdom in only six hours, and I can sleep through most of that! A true wonder!

[After taking another sip of his tea, he puts the cup down as he turns to look at the camera properly now.]

But I do not wish to go to bed yet! I've got a few important announcements to make. I spent my time in Goldenrod learning more about these computers I'm praising so much, and now I'm proud to say my career has officially started, as they say, "online"! [He leans in over the table to type on the Pokégear and attach a link to his carrd/linktree.] All my songs have been recorded, together with my beloved Pokémon, into these "music videos"! I've published the lyrics, together with my poetry, in book form as well. Which wasn't an easy task, let me tell you - why are these keyboards not in alphabetical order? It's baffling, to say the least. [Qwerty can go fuck itself, Jaskier thinks.] Anyway, a little over twenty years of barding are now available to everyone! I hope I can count on your patronage.

[A little over twenty years - that says something about his age, doesn't it? Next, Jaskier attaches a list of eggs.]

While I worked on my art and the quills to go with Geralt's inks, I also allowed my Pokémon to breed, so I have a few eggs for sale. I think the price is quite fair, but I'm open to trading too if you have anything that may catch my interest. And that reminds me - Claude, dear, that gift I promised? Is ready for you.

[Now all businesses have been covered, Jaskier relaxes - he sits back, crosses his legs and grabs his teacup again. But no, the post isn't over yet. He likes to talk, okay? He's a bard, he's in love with the sound of his own voice.]

Since my grumpy companion is currently napping, would any of you mind offering your company for this ride? I'm open to all kinds of conversation, although there are a couple of topics that have been on my mind lately. First, I wish to speak to any traveller that has been here since the beginning of these strange arrivals, or for at least six years. I may be interested to start a project to record the history of our people's experience in this world in the future, but I need to see exactly how much information is still fresh in the people's minds.

[More sipping of tea before continuing.]

Second, it's been brought to my attention that many adults around here are still naive when it comes to the matters of love - and I don't mean just the feelings, if you catch my drift. [He winks at the camera.] And honestly, I found this even more baffling than the keyboards! This realm allows information to be free for everyone instead of hoarded by scholars and mages! Available at the end of your fingertips! Do you have any idea what I would've given to have this "internet" in my world? Bawdy books cost an arm and a leg and could only be acquired in shady alleys that would give you at least ten different illness by just breathing in them. [Huff!!!] Nevertheless, if anyone needs guidance or has any questions, I'm here to answer them for you. You could say I'm quite experienced in--

[It's at that exact moment that Geralt photobombs the recording, walking by behind Jaskier while being shirtless, scars and muscles all exposed because clearly he hasn't caught on the fact his BFF is streaming. Cursing under his breath, Jaskier turns off the feed as his other hand grabs a cushion to throw at the witcher's head...]

Comments

VIDEO

[zukeini]

[Good lord man there's a lot going on in this video! Zuke was just cleaning his drumsticks and just listening quietly on the feed.]

Dang, you went and had music videos and all of that stuff already? Jeez, you move fast.

[rollstoseduce]

[Sorry, Zuke, Jaskier just loves talking that much. And now he's smiling proudly at the camera (or shall we say, smugly).]

It wasn't very difficult to record myself singing once I learned how to handle this "camera" better! They're songs that I've been performing for years, I know them as well as I know the palm of my hand - they come to me as naturally as moving a limb.

[zukeini]

Someone did post my drumming session online...Honestly with everything happening, I guess I never considered settling down that much.

[He appeared sheepish on the camera. That video went viral and he still wasn't so sure about all that fame on his end with no one to share it with. It felt wrong to have success without his partner.

Needless to say, it was somewhat enviable to see someone with so much gusto and confidence to go so much into it.

Also needless to say, he was going to put the links into his notebook to check later.]

I guess you can take the artist out of the home but not the home out of the artist.

[rollstoseduce]

They did? Oh, you MUST share the link with me, I'd be delighted to see you perform! Especially since I've been learning more about modern instruments - I've come to realize you may play something I'm not familiar with even if the name is the same.

[Zuke truly does appear sheepish, doesn't he? Jaskier has met people like him back in Oxenfurt University, and it's truly fascinating to see how they transform when they are on stage. Now Jaskier wants to see him in action even more!

He laughs at the expression.] But of course! An artist is something you are! A gift that shapes your very own heart and soul! You don't leave that behind because of a change of scenery!

[.......]

Unless you're near a nest of griffins, then it's probably better to stay quiet.

[spacebaloney]

Don't be shy. Drop that Staryutube link.

[Lance, don't be lazy. Look at the carrd.]

And yo, about that internet stuff. Has anybody shown you PornygonHub yet?

[AY DIOS MIOS, LANCE, NO!]

1/2

[rollstoseduce]

Young man, I am many a thing, but shy has never been one of them! [Lance gets A Look!] I did share the link!

[Jaskier huffs - if this had been about something else, he may've called Lance out for his laziness. But he's a sucker for views and he seriously wants to get his career going, so he decides against any kind of commentary and drops the damn link to his Staryutube channel anyway.]

2/2

[rollstoseduce]

[His demeanor quickly changes, however, when Lance mentions Pornyhub - Jaskier beams.]

I have already encountered such a site, another true wonder of this realm! [Jaskier, don't put porn on the same level as science!!!] Anything one could ever imagine and more! No reservations, no bigotry, no shame! And for free, as well! Would calling it a utopia be defying the gods, I wonder?

[spacebaloney]

Yeah, but I ain't clicking through all those links just for the Staryutube one. Learn one thing from me, a Staryutube King [He's not even close to being one], my man, people hate multiple clicking.

[Which is Lance actually giving Jasker some well meaning advice from the eyes of a man who grew up attached to some form of the internet. Lance just has a terrible way of doing it.]

Depending on which god we're talking about. I'm of the religion that this stuff should be free for anybody who have eyes. [So much for being Catholic.] Do you know people used to actually pay for this stuff? Imaging trading cold hard cash for a 10 minute video and you don't even know if it includes a money shot.

[rollstoseduce]

So have I learned, which is why I made that card as tutorials recommended. All my art just one click away. [He isn't falling for this, Lance!!!] A Staryutube King yourself, mmh? What are your videos about, may I ask? You should "drop" your link as well.

[But okay, that does make him laugh.] That's a god I could get behind. [What's a money shot?! Jaskier has a few guesses but he better google it later...] As I've mentioned before, it's something to be paid for in my world as well, although it only came in the written form. It amazes me more to find it here for free, because usually every product has its price. I suppose those- what was the word again?- those ads are the currency here, making you pay with annoyance.

i'm laughing already

[bestswordmaster]

[Well...shit.

It's the night before he and Sylvain are leaving Goldenrod, too, and at least Felix can count his lucky stars that Jaskier made this video after he and Geralt left town. But now he can't just pretend to have accidentally stumbled across the bard. And his eggs. Two of which Felix really wants.

He considers just asking Claude to buy them for him, or ordering them anonymously through this page thing of Jaskier's. But no. That's the coward's way out. He's not going to let this dumb bard and his dumb horrible personality get in the way of a simple business transaction. Especially not when said business transaction will make Sylvain very happy. And surely, Jaskier is professional enough not to bring his personal feelings into it...right? (Okay, he doesn't think that's true, but he can hope.) So he sucks it up and replies.]

This isn't a personal call so don't get all bent out of shape about it. I just want to buy two of your eggs and then I'll leave you alone. Forever, if I can help it.

[rollstoseduce]

[Well well well, what do we have here? Jaskier smiles smugly at the camera as he leans back on his seat and crosses his legs, looking like a self-important lord considering if he should help his subjects or not.

He's gonna enjoy this so much.]

I may consider selling to you... if you start by asking nicely and saying my name as if it wasn't burning your tongue.

[bestswordmaster]

[Of course his hopes are dashed already. No, Jaskier is not being at all professional about this, and Felix isn't surprised to see the bard living down to his expectations. The self-important lord impression is pretty spot-on, too...though given his family's rank in the Kingdom, Felix has never actually had to capitulate to such small-minded, supercilious people.

Until now, he supposes. Ugh.]

I should have known I couldn't expect you to act like a reasonable person about this.

[But Felix can stay above this pettiness. He can get through this conversation without wanting to reach into the screen and throttle this man. ...probably. He shakes his head and sighs, speaking in a deliberately measured tone.]

Fine. Jaskier, I would like to nicely ask that you sell two of your eggs to me.

[Okay, that wasn't so bad. Now the bard will be satisfied, right?

...right?]

[rollstoseduce]

I believe asking for proper manners during a business transaction is perfectly reasonable.

[He replies with a shrug. Yes, that's his excuse and he's sticking to it.

The request isn't bad, per se, Felix is trying he must admit. But does this satisfy the bard? Of course not. After letting out a thoughtful hum, he sips more of his tea and then he finally replies.]

You forgot the magic word.

video!

[forsaintcecilia]

[First off, Kazuki does read the bit at the end, which is too much for his poor virginal heart. At first, he can't reply because he's too embarrassed, so instead he clicks off to Jaskier's Linktree to check out his music while he cools off. Then he comes back to reply!]

I love your songs, they're so catchy! Especially that one, um, toss a coin to your Witcher, oh valley of plenty~ [Kazuki is a decent singer, but not a pro by any means.] You wrote them yourself?

[rollstoseduce]

[Did the naughty songs help you cool off too, Kazuki... As soon as the praise comes, Jaskier beams and even laughs a little with glee when Kazuki sings the chorus of his most famous song.]

You know it already! Oh, Kazuki, you've brought this bard great joy by allowing that song to live on the lips of the people again! And you're not bad yourself. [A nod.] I've recorded some songs from this realm as well, but those are labeled accordingly. All the songs from my home were written by yours truly, most of them inspired by real events. [Don't mind the fact those real events are embellished to hell and back...] Mayhap we can collaborate to play a song together some time, what do you think? I'd love to hear about the music from your world.

[forsaintcecilia]

[The naughty songs were properly labeled and he did not listen!!!]

That's amazing! The make up lyrics and a melody at the same time... I can compose okay, but lyrics are totally beyond me. And that they're actual stuff that happened in your world? That must've been really difficult!

I'd love to collaborate sometime! Are you familiar with the classical canon at all? That's where I've had most of my training.

[rollstoseduce]

You flatter me~. [He puts a hand on his chest with what absolutely is fake modesty. His tone of voice says "yes please praise me more".] Oh, yes! My world is nothing like this one - this realm of Pokémon is a utopia, while the Continent is dark and gritty. If I can be honest, I have no wish to go back. I rather like it here.

[The only thing he'd miss from his world is here with him, after all.]

I've been researching the local music culture, so I think I am familiar with at least the basics! Classical- that's the music with the big orchestras, isn't it? And no lyrics. That's quite a tough genre to compose for, Kazuki, you should be prouder of your abilities.

video;

[schachmeister]

[No offence to your artistic endeavours, Jaskier, but Armin will be skipping the subject of his songs and music entirely. There are probably other people around who are much better at discussing that sort of thing. He's here for the information exchange.]

I have only been here four years, but if you are interested, I can at least share my notes of the events that happened during that time. If you are really interested in trying to put together a history of our experiences here, you might want to talk to Sion and Ryner. Or Cecil or Riku. They've all been here for much longer than I have. If anyone knows about previous events, it's them.

[rollstoseduce]

A note-taker! Oh, that would be extremely helpful. Thank you, young man.

[This is all said while reaching off camera for his bag and taking out his own notebook, where he proceeds to write down the names Armin has mentioned. This is great, now he has a better basis to get started.]

This. Is. Brilliant. I've got so many interviews to plan now, how exciting! [He looks up at Armin then.] Oh, I've met Cecil! He's already been telling me some things about the first year of strange arrivals - travel was more difficult, and many a Pokémon breed weren't even around back then. I'm looking forward to putting this timeline together, see if I can find any kind of patterns - well, besides blaming it all on the gods' whims.

[schachmeister]

It'll take me some time to go through my journals and note down the important things, but I can send my notes to you after via my Wingull.

[Armin's journals are, essentially, his diaries in which he records everything. Which also means they are going to be full of a lot of personal thoughts and a lot of things that won't help Jaskier any in figuring out the history of their stay here.]

To be honest, it feels like something is brewing right now, so it'll probably be good for me to look over what happened while I was here. It's starting to blur together a bit.

[That's what happens when you've been here for four years. The big events are still all there, but a lot of the little things have drifted.]

[rollstoseduce]

Oh, worry not! Take your time - I'm still gathering information and evaluating my options. In fact, it helps me if you take some time, since I'm assuming you'll be doing so for a better organization of the data. I look forward to meeting your Wingull, I have some birds of my own that will offer a warm welcome.

[It's not like he needs the information to be better organized, he's nosy and he's used to peeking into Geralt's own journals. But four years is still a lot, and he has other projects that need his attention as well.

Speaking of nosy... Jaskier tilts his head at the camera, curiosity piqued.] What do you mean, "something is brewing"? What has made you reach that conclussion?

video;private because look what you did, jaskier

[nastyboy]

[So. Dimitri was going to try and - awkwardly - make polite small talk with his boyfriend's... friend? Other lover? Dimitri isn't sure what the proper term is, here.]

[Either way, he's trying to be cordial, because, well... It feels like the better thing to do. So he's fully prepared to talk about Jaskier's music, or ask about Geralt-]

[And then Jaskier just casually brings up sex and well okay then.]

[Dimitri's face is red when he finally gets himself to respond, and only after getting Gremlin to help him make the message private.]

...Geralt seems to be doing well.

you're welcome

[rollstoseduce]

[Oh, look at the red face - Jaskier is so amused already! Looks like Dimitri is one of the adults he mentioned in need to meet the magic of PornygonHub...]

Hello, Dimitri. [This smile says RUN FOR YOUR SANITY, DIMITRI!] We are doing just fine, thank you. How about you? I like this new shade of red you're wearing, goes wonderfully with your hair.

[nastyboy]

Thank you. We are going to talk about trains now, I believe. We are going to talk about only trains.

[Please let him talk about trains]

It seems rather lavish.

[rollstoseduce]

[Jaskier can't help laughing - yep, confirmed: Dimitri is one of the people that needs a trip to the nearest sex shop.]

What else could we possibly talk about? [Oh, he knows. But gotta tease first!

That last comment gets a nod from Jaskier.] Luxurious, isn't it? As soon as we heard private cabins were available, we knew we had to get one instead of regular tickets. I like my comforts, and so does Geralt, no matter how much he grumbles about unnecessary expenses. There is something to be said about privacy and a proper soft bed, don't you think?

[Yes, bed singular.]