video (backdated to 2/28)

[lovelybottom]

[When the feed clicks on, it first shows Geralt's chest, covered by his usual black shirt that's partly unbuttoned, showing a decent swathe of chest. His skin has the faint pinkish tone of someone who, while not sunburnt yet, is flirting dangerously with the possibility, despite diligent sunscreen application. The 'gear is being held by someone else, however; Jaskier has it.]

Stay here, Jaskier.

['Here', as it turns out, is on a beach on Four Island. It's picturesque-- white sand, brilliantly blue water with way too many Luvdisc in it (seriously, why are there so many), the distant call of sea-birds. The scenic beauty is marred a bit by a distant shipwreck; it foundered on a sandbar and is accessible from shore only at low tide when the water is out far enough. Even so, the water will be near chest-height even on Geralt, but it's the quickest way to the beached vessel.]

Watch Kiri. I'll take care of what's haunting the ship.

[Jaskier’s face isn’t on the screen but you can hear the pouting.] Killjoy.

Killjoy! [Kiri certainly seems to like that word, twirling in her sundress and laughing.]

[Geralt turns and wades out into the surf while Jaskier (and the camera) remain on shore, holding his Doublade-- one of the only Pokémon he saw fit to bring with him on this hunt-- out of the water as he goes. When he reaches the sandbar, the water level is back below his knees and he straps the sword Pokémon on his back again, like witcher's blades. The boat itself appears to be some kind of small pleasure cruiser, roughly fifty feet long. Geralt has to jump to reach a small ladder hanging over the side of it so that he can climb up onto the deck.]

[Kiri is obedient about not following at first, but once Geralt has gotten some distance, she starts going forward, clearly trying to be sneaky. A Cramorant and Swanna are following behind with the clear attitude of resigned parents. She has her own little knife out, even if it's a perfectly harmless butter knife. Who knows where she picked that up.]

My little lady, are your swimming skills up to the task? [There is some concern in Jaskier’s voice, but mostly it’s amusement. No, he isn’t stopping her. He’s used to way more dangerous hunts than this one - he knows it’s fine.

But Kiri's very quickly in over her head. Literally. Her childish doggy paddle isn't really getting her anywhere in the waves and she squawks as she goes under. Cramorant is on the case! Not long after, a pouting Kiri is coughed back up onto the sand.] Killjoy.

[Geralt, meanwhile, walks the length of the deck cautiously, looking for the typical signs of a haunting. He reaches the stern of the boat, where the deck is lower to the water to allow for sunbathing or fishing off of the back. So far, he doesn't appear to have found much, just the leftovers from the boat's previous inhabitants that they left behind upon beaching. He reaches the end of the lower deck, where it juts out over the dark, deep waters past the sandbar, and looks down.]

[There's a sudden crack that's loud enough to be heard from shore, and Geralt's white head disappears from view as the deck collapses underneath him. He drops straight into the water.]

[The bright white of his hair would normally be quite visible against the blue water, and for a minute or two, nothing resurfaces. Then-- his head appears again just long enough for him to get a breath before he's gone, back under the surface as though something had grabbed him by the ankle and pulled. Rinse and repeat a few more times, each subsequent dunk giving Geralt less and less of an opportunity to get a breath.]

[It's probably fine.]

[About half a minute later, there's a sudden burst of water as an anchor brakes the surface like a breaching whale, rocketing out of the water as though it had been launched from a cannon. It falls back into the water with a tremendous splash, sinking down like, well. An anchor.]

[Also probably fine. Still no white head, though.]

[Another minute or two ticks by and the water remains placid. The amount of time that Geralt had been underneath is probably starting to hit on the limits of human lung capacity, give or take. Which is probably slightly more concerning? For some people, anyway. Jaskier doesn’t sound too concerned when he starts -very confidently- counting.]

Three… two… one...

[And there it is-- the white head, breaking the surface as Geralt draws in several deep, painful-looking gasps. He swims to the sandbar and hauls himself onto it, kneeling in the shallow water with one half of the Doublade in one hand and something else clutched in the other. He sheaths the Pokémon on his back again and awkwardly stands, then starts making his way back to shore, wading through the water yet again.

Jaskier laughs when he notices a certain group of pink, heart-shaped Pokémon trying to help Geralt to get back on said shore, pushing him with his cute little bodies.] I think they’re grateful for your services, witcher.

[Geralt steps onto the shore, drenched to the skin and looking a bit more like a half-drowned rat than a witcher. The Luvdisc swim as close to the beach as they can, flashing their little heart-shaped bodies at the two of them. He looks deeply unamused at literally every part of this situation.] Get me a fucking towel, bard.

Get me a fucking towel! [As if Kiri wouldn't mimic that. She's devilishly proud, even if she is still soaked from her little adventure.]

[Jaskier sighs.] Stop passing on your terrible manners to her, you brute--

[And that’s how the feed abruptly ends. Sorry to anyone that wanted to popcorn at their old married couple’s spat dumb argument number 35684.]

Comments

Action!

[copykiri]

[Kiri doesn't actually care too much about being wet, but she really wants to see the Pokeball.]

What Pokemon? What Pokemon!

[One word of that is Jaskier's voice, and another is someone else's. She's getting better at combining different phrases.]

[rollstoseduce]

[Kiri may not care about being wet, but Jaskier does. He doesn't want her to get sick, and wet Geralt is... ahem. Better not go there. The point is, even if they were rude about it, Jaskier does hand them the fucking towels as he nods at Kiri's question.]

I want to know as well. And don't you dare be stingy with the details.

[lovelybottom]

Dhelmise.

[At least, that's what the little device told him that it was, anyway. Geralt starts toweling off his hair, mostly because it's irritating when it sticks to his face.]

It's a plant, mostly.

[He's not... wrong.]

Video

[dreamsofahero]

*... well. That was interesting!*

I take it you do this often?

Video

[lovelybottom]

[Geralt appears, by the movement of the video feed, to be walking and trying to dry off at the same time. It's a process.]

No. Usually I kill monsters, I don't trap them.

[But we're not in Grimdark Fantasy Poland anymore, so monster killing's off the table for now.]

Re: Video

[dreamsofahero]

I meant more the fighting them with little more than your bare hands part, actually.

VIDEO

[seacub]

Ummmm...

Are you guys okay? [Not that he knows Any of them (though he recognizes a certain someone from the cooking contest- and may in turn be recognized as 'the kid who got a place by getting possessed'), but ghost stuff tends to catch his eye.]

...Was that a dhelmise, actually?

[rollstoseduce]

[Jaskier does indeed recognize him! He doesn't remember his name, but possessed cooking is something you never forget.]

All fine and dandy! [He replies with a dismissive wave of his hand.] They're brave adventurers who have been through worse. And you'd be correct! This little town has had a little haunted problem since the shipwreck happened, but it's finally over now. I admit I wasn't expecting the Luvdisc to be as grateful as the locals!

[Let's ignore the fact the Luvdisc have been bothered them since they arrived to Sevii...]

[seacub]

I mean we don't really die here so... [Ahem, that aside.] As long as nothing too serious happened though, then that's good. [~Blacking Out~ aside, you still have to live with say, a broken arm after all.]

A shipwreck haunted by a dhelmise though... I wonder how that happened...

[The boy pauses, before adding-] I think they normally like to chase big pokemon, like wailmer, so it's weird to think of them as going after people a lot... ...but if they were, then that's probably why the luvdisc are happy too right? Dhelmise live in the same water so...

[If a Dhelmise is ornery enough to go after people sized things, it's Probably ornery enough to go after luvdisc, is his thinking.]

VIDEO

[lovelybottom]

It is.

[The anchor probably gave it away. Not a whole lot of creatures around here that toss those around.]

It had been chasing off the locals. Now it's no longer a problem.

[It's a better resolution than most of his hunts. No one's even dead yet, not even the monster-- that's practically unheard of.]

[seacub]

[The anchor definitely gave it away.] Er...you caught it then?

I wonder why it was doing that though. Normally they're pretty happy to just sit in the water...

[bestswordmaster]

[Yes, Felix is aware that Jaskier will be able to see and respond to this. No, he doesn't care.]

Geralt, what was that? Did you defeat it?

[lovelybottom]

It's a ghost. And yes.

[G E R A L T]

[bestswordmaster]

Ugh. Of course it's a ghost. Why is this world so damn haunted?

[He shakes his head.]

I noticed you were fighting with your Doublade as an actual blade. Had I known mine would let me, I wouldn't have evolved it.

[ video ]

[deathknightdestroyer]

What on earth was that?!

[rollstoseduce]

I want to reply "a haunted anchor" but apparently the real Pokémon is the seaweed.

[WHAT IS POKÉMON LOGIC? NOBODY KNOWS!]

[deathknightdestroyer]

I.

[ Hold on, she needs a moment. ]

This entire world feels like a joke sometimes, and my comprehension of the natural world is the punchline. [ Lysithea-- ] Is it supposed to be a 'ghost' type? Would it's other typing be plant or water, then?

[ video ]

[lovelybottom]

Dhelmise.

[THANKS GERALT, THAT EXPLAINS EVERYTHING.]

Video;

[schachmeister]

Was that Dhelmise causing trouble?

[He's concerned, he certainly sounds concerned. Though, unfortunately for Geralt (then again, Geralt might not care about being fussed over by some stranger) his worry is aimed more towards the Dhelmise.]

What are your plans for it?

Video;

[lovelybottom]

Yes. It chased off the locals who were trying to take care of the shipwreck.

[Because, y'know, having a haunted ghost plant trying to drown you seriously hampers your attempts at a clean-up.]

[It's strange, though, to have to have a plan for what to do with monsters after a hunt. Usually, the end of a hunt meant that his part in the problem was done with.]

I'll keep it unless a suitable place can be found for it. Someplace far from human interference. It's... hostile.

[YEAH NO SHIT IT'S HOSTILE, IT TRIED TO KILL YOU, GERALT.]

[stardiving]

[Well, this seems like something familiar. Can you get homesickness for a person, because this is exactly the kind of ill-advised nonsense the Warrior of Light would do.]

You seem rather unconcerned for having nearly watched someone drown.

[rollstoseduce]

[High fantasy protags, man. Jaskier shakes his head and waves a hand to match said unconcern.]

You start this conversation with a misconception, dear elvish watcher! [An "elvish watcher" that doesn't want to punch him for Toss a coin so Jaskier is going to assume this gentleman hasn't heard his songs about Geralt.] He was never in danger of drowning! The White Wolf has fought bigger and stronger beasts than this Pokémon - I know Geralt, and I know the extent of his skills. Trust me: if he had been in any real danger, you'd know.

video

[flurryofbeaus]

What the fuck?

[What the fuck are you doing? What the fuck was that pokemon? What the fuck is this entire ridiculous world? There's absolutely no elaboration, so it could be any of the above. Or all of the above.

It's probably all of the above.]

video

[lovelybottom]

Ship was haunted.

[That's technically true. Like, Dhelmise are ghost-type Pokémon, so any place that they're inhabiting is, by definition, haunted, for a certain definition of haunted. There was definitely a ghost in the vicinity. It's just also a ghost that looks like seaweed and possesses detritus from shipwrecks.]

Kiri mimics Beau a lot but if this isn't cool lmk and I'll change it.

[rollstoseduce]

[Jaskier wants to be sassy and say the question needs to be more specific, but there's something bothering him - something that rings a bell. He blinks a couple of times... then suddenly he gasps.]

I recognize that "fuck"!

[Jaskier, what.]

You're one of Kiri's friends! The Mighty Nein! Oh, how wonderful it is to finally meet one of you!