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[hellablue]

everybody always talks about their adorable puppers and kawaii kitties but i never see anyone talking about the bad shit
the poke-horror stories
those mons u coveted cuz they sounded precious but ended up bein total fucking nightmares
or pokemon they just str8 up dont trust cuz what idk pokeprejudism or w/e
like mr. mime
those fuckers are just weird ok

my ex's sister had this weird lil cherry looking thing
loved it to death, doted on it, all the gross shit
then one day like a fuckin switch it evolved and from then on it just wanted to kick her ass
it was hilarious tbh but nobody saw that shit comin

i swear to god my old gyarados wouldve sold my soul to satan for a sip of water
so i wanna hear about that kinda shit

Comments

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[strings_theory]

do I gotta remind you about fuckin' Demon again

because he's named that
for
a
fuckin'
reason

[hellablue]

pls do
im conveniently high and have forgotten everything
old stories can be new stories

[strings_theory]

the only people he puts up with being anywhere fuckin' near me

is carly and yours asses
and emporio when he's in that fucking eevee onesie

it's wild

otherwise he can and will strangle anyone and everyone else within a two foot radius of me

also I guess Dickhead counts, too, that motherfucker tried to take my face off last time I let him outta his ball

text;

[necrodentia]

I'm afraid to ask what a Mr. Mime is like...

[ Someone is very new here and suddenly very afraid. ]

[hellablue]

dude theyre so fuckin creepy
trapped-in-a-box acting weirdos
like i know that u know that ur not really in a fuckin box
and thats where they get u.

[necrodentia]

So, it's literally a mime?
Just an animal whose whole thing is that it's a mime?

Mimes aren't even that interesting...

[logical_lioness]

My friend had a Ghastly while he was here. Really embarrassing story, but he decided to play a trick on me when we all went to the Ruins of Alph and morphed into an exact copy of my friend.

Long story short, he may have, uh, well....kissed me.

That was really awkward for everyone.

Also I have a Mismagius who decided to buy a pokemon egg without my knowledge using my credit details.

Just be wary of ghost pokemon. And dittos.

[hellablue]

oh my god ghosts are such pesky shits
but ghastlies ESPECIALLY man i had one once
all they want to do is smooch and lick like bro
get away, youre a literal ball of gas

mine had a weird face
and he liked stealing my gear to flirt w/ everyone
so damn strange

TEXT

[insidescoop]

Pretty sure if I speak ill of Mimi-chan, he's going to take my soul by force.

No one has seen under the costume, and I think the last time someone tried they woke up at the PokeCenter so haha, whoo! Well!

[hellablue]

fuckin a man
ive never had the balls to fuck with mimikyu
theyre so painfully my aesthetic but i chloe price admit to not having the stones
its gonna be like a nip slip im gonna look at it at the wrong time and there goes my fucking soul

the joke is the houseboat is shaped like a lotad....

[insidescoop]

They're pretty great about keeping themselves covered at least!

But honestly one between the three of us is enough, just live vicariously through the haunted lotad boat.

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[nastyboy]

I am left to wonder if shiny Paliens of a particular color are more prone to anger and murder than others. My boyfriends who have shinies seem to have gotten those who are inclined to decent nature, or are sweet.

Yet I possess two whom are both yellow, and make me wonder if there is something in the blood that causes them to be that way.

Grindy possesses a simple bloodlust, which was well enough before he evolved, but I wonder about Burry, who is a Pineco.

[If he had a nickle for every time a yellow Shiny Pokemon had anger problems... He'd have ten cents, but it's weird that it happened twice]

[hellablue]

it makes sense dude
i mean beedrill are yellow and think about it
those guys are mean as hell
maybe it leaked into the air
and ive never met a pikachu that i didnt think would shock me if i looked at it wrong
youre probably onto somethin here

[fingersandteeth]

I mean, there's always Penny, my Drifblim, who keeps trying to kidnap any eggs in her vicinity. As much as I prefer having my pokemon out of the computer whenever possible, I really do have to stick her in there whenever we have eggs.

[hellablue]

you uh
probably shouldnt let her around kids or the elderly either
but thats just me being overly cautious its probably fine

[uncutetomboy]

q-no my quagsire is just awful
he's v stupid and i caught him because he broke into my room in the cherrygrove inn!!!!
and then i had to fix the screen i broke kicking him through

[hellablue]

and im sure he still didnt feel bad for what he did

[pinkxeno]

whats a mr mime??

[hellablue]

its like if a clown and satan banged and had a rly unfortunate baby
i fuckin hate them

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[scourgingstars]

My horse wants to kill me. That counts, does it not?

[hellablue]

depends
has it acted on it or do u just get weird vibes
cuz idk if it counts unless u have a confirmed attempt
or if it just idk told u, i wouldnt put it past a horse having telepathy here

[text]

[captainash]

My Purugly, Hellspawn, earned her name at exactly 32 seconds old, when she decided to celebrate her hatching by clawing out eyes.

[hellablue]

mmm delicious eye-scream

[fearinahandfulof]

Other pokemon are often terrified of my Skitty. I'm not sure why, but I don't really question it anymore.

[hellablue]

maybe cuz ive met more cats that would sell my soul for a flake of catnip than wouldnt
id keep an eye on that skitty if i were you dawg