[video / action for the parking lot of the violet city dedenny's]

[meteorman]

[At a little past three in the morning a video shows up on the 'gear. Ford has been something of a cryptid as of late -- more than he usually is -- and this picture just hammers that home. He's standing in what looks like... the parking lot of a Dedenny's? The lighting isn't great considering he's outside at night, which really adds to the ambience. The light from the sign glints off his glasses. He looks a little manic, but what's new?]

Come to -- what's the phrase-- come to the Violet City Dedenny's if you want an asskicking.

[Look at him, learning memes that are simultaneously from his future and also extremely out of date.]

I'm turning seventy-four in one week. I want to start celebrating early.

[There's a momentary pause.]

I should clarify I am referring to a Pokémon battle. If you were to physically fight me it wouldn't be very fair to you.

I am also open to verbal debate if you don't feel like coming all the way to Violet at three in the morning. I've noticed there isn't egalitarian appreciation of Pokémon and I won't stand for it. Every Pokémon is cute, not only your standard Eevee or Cleffa.

[He lifts up a fat little Pyukumuku. It extends its 'hand' and bops him gently on the face, skewing his glasses.]

You look at Eviscerator and tell her she isn't adorable.

Comments

[meteorman]

How do you imagine you'll learn if you don't try?

About eighty percent of the people who challenge my gym are schoolchildren. Many of them win. Experience is no replacement for sheer moxie.

[scourgingstars]

good heavens, this realm truly is indiscriminate in its dispensing of power

what an odd change of pace

either way i fear i've outgrown 'moxie' in your own words

[meteorman]

[Well. To be fair a lot of them fight him for the unofficial sticker version of his badge and he purposefully doesn't break out the same kind of strategic bullshit he used on the Elite Four when he's fighting little Timmy from the Trainer School, but. Details. For the difficulty level he sets, the ones that win win based on genuine merit. He's not going to get persnickety qualifying it.

Anyway. He wasn't going to ask but this guy keeps bringing it up and that means it's not putting his foot in his mouth to acknowledge it.]

Exactly how old does one have to be for that?

[scourgingstars]

old enough to be very tired of the world and its people no matter the realm one finds oneself in

old enough perhaps to be wide awake at such an uncommon hour pondering one's purpose for existing in a universe so clearly one's own antithesis

old enough to be horrifically intensely bored no matter what i do




ヽ(･∀･)ﾉ

[meteorman]

Ah, you're one of those ancient beings. The ones that like to sit around in a general state of malaise, being depressingly philosophical at anyone who will listen to you.

It's a step up from actively being malevolent but I can't imagine it's much fun for you.

[This man feels no fear he will come for your kneecaps no matter how old you are]

[scourgingstars]

oh i've been plenty malevolent the past...forty years? somewhere around forty, i'm not all that skilled at having a sense of time anymore.

i think i've quite tired myself out on malevolence as well