text; early Nov.

[sassymaru]

A word of caution





Be immensely careful

Should you ingest a concoction known as a pumpkin spiced latte

Comments

[Text]

[hippocarnival]

[... All right he's gotta ask.]

why?

[sassymaru]

They are the most devious culinary concoctions ever created

[hippocarnival]

devious how

[sassymaru]

They lure you in with the simple pleasure of a caffeinated drink

And then they strike

laying you low with the aftershocks!!

[hippocarnival]

i thought they were just sweet

text;

[apshot]

It's just a regular fucking drink. Nothing that needs that kind of caution label thrown on it.

Text;

[nightyorb]

So, do you have a general thing against coffee or...?

[Like PSLs aren't Riz's favourite on account of there being way too little coffee in there, but he'll drink it if he's got nothing else.]

text;

[schachmeister]

Shadowmaru, are you all right? Did... did it make you sick? Spicy things can be a bit too much to handle for some people.

[Armin doesn't really go to Starmiebucks all that much, so he is not really familiar with pumpkin spice lattes. Jean isn't-- the Jean that had his own little travelling coffee shop isn't here anymore, but there is still some brand loyalty on his side. What if that Jean ever returned and asked if Armin had contributed to his greatest 'foe'? He couldn't do it.

Also, there is no Starmiebucks on his gym island, so it'd be kind of a long way to go for a cup of coffee.]

[sassymaru]

That is only the half of it!!

They lie to you that they are simply sweet concoctions! But no! There is a deeper deviousness!

[sassymaru]

I would never raise false charges! The warning is extremely necessary!

[sassymaru]

Only these devious lies!!

[sassymaru]

I shall never be the same again. Remember me fondly, for I am undone.

[Armin why did you ask...]

[schachmeister]

SHADOWMARU ARE YOU OKAY? DO YOU NEED A DOCTOR?

[Please don't give him a heart attack like this.]

[nightyorb]

[...]

...
Dude, what?

[sassymaru]

These drinks lie.

They promise to be nothing more than a simple, delightful beverage, but do nothing but steal your energy.

[hippocarnival]

tell me about it!! what did it do??

[sassymaru]

A most horrific thing.

It





Stole my energy.

[hippocarnival]

[... What.]

stole it?

isn't coffee supposed to give you energy?

[sassymaru]

Stole it!

You see, that is the lie. Supposedly, it gives you energy, but! Not these!

Text;

[heir_conditioned]

Did someone do something to it? I've heard they're harmless but I haven't experienced it either. Nor do I want to if they're actually lethal. Come to think of it are you sure it wasn't a misplaced Sinistea?

[nightyorb]

Are you sure they didn't give you decaf?

[sassymaru]

Yes!

Extremely sure!

[sassymaru]

Alas no physician can assist.

I need my energy returned to me. And my youth. Those devious drinks have stolen them both!!

Text;

[sassymaru]

Don't bother, I assure you!

They drain you of your energy and leave you a wasted husk.

[heir_conditioned]

The Sinistea or the pumpkin spice? I'm assuming you mean pumpkin spice, even if it's true of both where irresponsibly trained Sinistea are concerned.

If that's right then I'm glad you've told us all.