video;

[shiro2hero]

[It's a terrible selfie angle. But at least there's a beach in view - even if most of it is occupied by someone who uh. Well it looks like Shiro. Except that Shiro would never willingly wear the "outfit" he's currently sporting. Does he even own sunglasses? He does now.]

Man, I am bored. And lonely. And sad.

[... is he reading off a script. Who is holding those cue cards.]

I want to stop being sad! All the time! It sucks! But I know what helped my best friend ever, Lance stop being lonely...

[Oh no.]


So... to any eligible dude out there, I say...

[With that, "Shiro" reels back, and points his fingers at the screen, in a dramatic, poised fashion. Angling the 'gear just enough to put the sun at the best angle. He raises his eyebrows, peers over the rims of the sunglasses and drawls one, simple word:]

✨ ~ H e y ~ ✨


[Yeah, no, this isn't Shiro at all. It's his Gallade, Blue. If you listen really close, you can just hear someone screaming internally in the distance.]

Comments

[bugbeverage]

<sub>[BJ is just kicked back in a lobby chair in the Pokemon Center waiting on his dudes to get healed up and just idly scrolling.]

[And then he finds this. His brows almost disappear into his hairline which is saying something because his forehead is massive.]</sub>

Well hellooooooo~

[shiro2hero]

[BJ that is a feat worth marketing. Blue pauses, because he's never seen this guy before.]

Hello.

[He... tries his own eyebrow waggle.]

[It's not great.]

[text]

[perfectteatime]

[ Sorry, he's an Espurr right now, so his dumb little paw-beans can only work so well on text. ]

????????????????????????????????????

[text]

[shiro2hero]

;D HELLOOOO?

[Tragically... Blue knows how to text.]

video; @rose_of_gloucester

[silky_bearing]

[Sadly, Lorenz' sinistea knows how to use the gear way better than he does so there is, plainly visible for all to see, one Lorenz Hellman Gloucester with his hair pulled up into a ponytail on one side, a hot pink scrunchie holding it in place. There's some rather inexpertly applied bright pink eyeshadow as well that... despite the lack of skill actually doesn't look half bad. His lips are bubblegum pink but it's hard to say if that's also low quality makeup or if it's because of the distressingly large wad of cherry bubblegum he seems to be chewing.

And that's not even mentioning the outfit.]

Oh wow. You are hella fine. [Blue would be forgiven for not realizing Lorenz is even a man until "Lorenz" speaks. There is no mistaking his voice for anything but masculine.

Stephanie is having the time of her un-life okay.]

[shiro2hero]

Whoa!

[Blue is a little bit surprised, to be honest. He's never seen an outfit like that. Or that much ... gum... ever. But that sounds like a male human? Right? Okay. He can work with that.]

Uhhhhhh.... hey~!

[Why yes, he is trying that line again. Is that the only line Blue knows? Probably.]

Video

[heartofalioness]

[You know, Allura thought she'd lucked out- at least relatively speaking- swapping minds with Coressa. Sweet, gentle, motherly Coressa. So when Coressa finally gets the PokéGear to work so she can respond to "Shiro's" broadcast (Allura bets her bottom Pokébuck that's Blue), she thinks it's to scold him for taken advantage of this situation.]

You mean any eligible dude that is not Keith, yes?

[You don't need to listen carefully at ALL to hear the shrill "EEEE!" come out of an ice fox mouth, easily translated as "CORESSA WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!"]

[shiro2hero]

[Oh hey, it's a friend! He can try to shove the Flirt under the rug. Maybe. Hopefully.]

Well, schyeah. Have you seen that hair?

[If anyone ever wondered where Blue learned his mannerisms from, it's probably painfully apparent in that statement.]

[forsaintcecilia]

[Kazuki (Tonks) replies only with a short video of him swiping pokedollars out of his hand and towards the camera.]

[shiro2hero]

Oh yeah! Awesome! Paid appearance!

[nightyorb]

H-hey, you can't do that on. There's [strangled cough] kids on here.

[It's him. He's the kid and he's on here and oh god no.]

[shiro2hero]

Really? Where?

[Blue....]

[questioneverything]

Oh, my. [Romelle totally had her chin in her hands for this one. Or... perhaps someone else...] I dare say, any eligible bachelor would be hard pressed not to enjoy that view.

[shiro2hero]

Well good.

That's the point. [He looks. So smug about that, too. And it's very, very hard not to flirt with "Romelle" - but no, Blue can get his own dates. This is for his dumb trainer.]

[tempredmental]

[There was some serious judgement going on in this response.]

Just... putting it all out there, huh?

[shiro2hero]

How else are we gonna accomplish anything!

[Judge all you want, Blue's gonna sulk.]

video

[wrappedwarm]

[She just blankly stared, blinking.]

Oh... Mister Shiro is still sick... and weird. [He has been judged by the child.]

video --> audio

[shiro2hero]

Oh crap!

[Oh that's a kid. Blue slaps the gear. A lot. Until he can get it changed to audio.]

Hello! Tiny child! Nothing to see here!

[Video]

[foolishwren]

<sub>[Heather is on the screen. But it's not Heather, actually. Heather does not have thumbs right now. And her hands are too big to easily handle the 'Gear without snapping it in two.]

[No, the creature currently inhabiting Heather's bright-eyed, befreckled body is almost indistinguishable from her normal self... at first.]

[Because when faced with shirtless, trying-to-be-seductive Shiro, Heather would definitely at least try not to laugh.]

[Rodan, on the other hand, points at the screen and starts to almost-literally roar with laughter.]

[But not for the reason that most sane people would be.]

[Because Rodan (in Heather's body) also immediately gestures to his/her chest before pointing and laughing some more.]

[He is laughing at Shiro's funny naked man tiddies. Because humans have nipples! AND THAT'S WEIRD AND HILARIOUS!]</sub>

[Video]

[shiro2hero]

Uh, excuse me. What is so funny?

[If this were actually Shiro, he'd be more concerned, or more amused by the laughter. Or glad to see Heather's face.]

[But this is Blue. And he doesn't know her all that well. He's also only slightly aware of the fact he's not the only pokemon in his trainer's body. As such, his little Gallade Brain just thinks some random human is cackling at his very carefully composed beauty shot.]

This is handsome!

[woofdad]

W-what-- [HEY WHAT.

If it weren't for the chaos he's already encountered at home, Grant might spend longer trying to figure out if Shiro is experiencing some kind of breakdown, but-- no, the answer here is pretty obvious, between said chaos and, uh... prior experience.

Like the Hot or Not post.]

...Blue. Cut it out.

[shiro2hero]

[Oh shi-]

[He tries to clear his throat, and puff up a little. Nope, not Blue, not here. Blue is not home!]

Hello, fellow... human man. Whom I am a friend of!

Did you know, you are very attractive to my human eyeballs?

[FINGERGUNS!!]

video, UN: BestSetter (finally tags this bc I've been DYING at this whole thing)

[grandtrashking]

[That Sure Is one hell of a first impression on an 18yo who arrived only about a month ago and is experiencing this world's craziness for the first time. Tooru is fortunate enough not to have been affected by this insanity, thankfully. But he's a mix of judging and questioning when he decides to actually reply.

Instead of, you know, laughing his ass off. Like he was doing only moments ago.]

Uh.. Hi? Are you okay?

[shiro2hero]

[Blue just... Scowls. This was not his intention!! He was supposed to attract flirts! Not laughs!]

Uh, yeah? I'm totally fine! Why? Are you not fine, Juvenile... human?

video

[zukeini]

Uh.















Hey.

video

[shiro2hero]

[Oh heck yeah. Blue strikes a pose. And winks.]

Hey.

[... that is the only pickup line he knows.]

[vrdantwind]

Hi! That looks cool! Where can I get sunglasses? I want to wear them too!

[That - sure is Claude, in theory, beaming at the screen and seemingly totally oblivious to Blue's seductive charms. Which makes it very obvious it's not Claude to anyone who knows him first thing, of course. But there's a charming enthusiasm to that response, all the same. Whatever pokémon is in Claude's body, it's clearly a very happy and excitable one. Claude's voice certainly seems to be pitched a lot higher, too. Like he's just inhaled a balloon's worth of helium.

But then a Joltik jumps down from the top of Claude's head, actually landing on the Gear itself, peering into the screen with four big blue eyes. It taps the screen with one tiny leg.] Blue, are you going to make Shiro mad at you again?

[Grant's not the only person who remembers Hot or Not. And that's definitely Claude's normal voice coming from the Joltik.]

Either way, though, I don't know how successful your plan's going to be when everyone else is swapped around, too.

[shiro2hero]

Of course it looks cool! I got them from Lance! The coolest!

[Yeah, that's right, that's Blue's idol right there. So of course, he borrowed Lance's wardrobe. Or part of it. The guy's too noodle-y for anything else.]

[That smarmy, confident look falls though, as soon as Claude-tik appears.]

I don't know what you're talking about! I am a normal human male looking for eligible human males!