Video: War and Strife in the City of Goldenrod

[oleaeuropaea]

[The video opens to a… very exhausted looking Vash. He smiles like there’s no problem, but it’s clear from the gum in his hair and a bunch of grass sticking out of his hood that he’s had a long day. His face is rubbed fretfully, before a wiggly-fingered wave is offered up to those tuned in.]

Hey, guys. [He stretches out, then scratches at his hair, grimacing as his fingers streak through the gum.] Wondering if you can help me out? Got these two little guys following me around, a — Grafaiai and an Impidimp I think?

Tuuuurns out I may or may not have offended them? See, they won’t leave me alone. Like, nonstop pranks, that sort of thing! They’re real famous around town I hear, seein’ as how everyone seems to know about them.

Guess my question is… do you know how a guy can do some Poke-appeasing? I’d sure like to get a break from the chaos, and I’m worried my team is getting fed up too! Any help would be gr-

[The camera cuts off as a fingernail sized glob of paper hits Vash’s cheek. Meanwhile, the Pokegear itself is picked up and turned around. A Grafaiai delightedly chitters, while behind him, an Impidimp seems to be holding a spitball shooter? Gross!

In any case, the two quickly scatter at the sound of movement on the other side of the screen.]

Hey, get back here!

[And just like that, the feed cuts off. Uhhh….]

Comments

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[livlaughlove]

[livio is hunched over the gear in a little department store break room that might as well be a broom closet for someone of his size.]

I thought you said they weren't doin' much -- y'look awful rough, hon. [his tone isn't chiding, but concerned. maybe more than is necessary...] Ya tried feedin' 'em? Peace offerin's? ... Money?

[oleaeuropaea]

[It takes a second for the feed to kick back up. When it does, Vash is sprawled out on his stomach while both Pokemon play Hop on Pop on his back.]

Ah, it's fine! Really, it's all pretty juvenile! See, they're having fun!

[He angles the camera toward them, only to receive a rapid chittering in response.]

I... think they're having fun?

[livlaughlove]

[there's the very real possibility that vash has simply been too nice. not that he should be mean to the critters, no, but firm...]

Hey, y'all oughta ease up. Humans aren't as sturdy as you, y'know!

[... it feels fucking weird calling vash a human, but technically...]

[oleaeuropaea]

[That is... definitely weird to hear. Vash's head jerks up, expression quizzical. Unfortunately for them both, neither Pokemon seems to be discouraged. They continue hopping, making their own little chittering sounds as the go. Likely calling Vash names.]

They're awful stubborn, huh?

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[shiro2hero]

Are... are you okay?

[oleaeuropaea]

[Give him a second. Eventually the feed clicks back on, with the Impidimp now using his head as a bongo.]

Me? I'm great! [The grin persists, despite the thumping to the top of his skull.] What makes you ask?

[shiro2hero]

You just uh...

[He gestures at his own hair.] Look a little bit like a substitute teacher on a bad day.

[oleaeuropaea]

Oh, that? [He laughs, a sound that wobbles with each strike to the top of his skull.]

It's normal! Totally fine! Who doesn't get gum in their hair?

[shiro2hero]

Most people...

You sure you don't need help out there?

[video]

[gachatia]

Wh...

[Why is it every time he remembers to check his Poke'gear, and Vash is on it, the poor man's being brutalized by Pokemon? Geez, dude cannot catch a break.]

I'm...not one for the battles in this world, per say? But this might be an example of a time where battle is necessary. If any other appeasements don't work, of course - they may need to be reminded that their actions have consequences.

["Fuck around and find out", but more eloquent.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[It's just part of being the Humanoid Typhoon, G'raha! Trouble always finds him, even if said trouble is his own doing, more or less. After all, if he'd had better manners with the Snorunt, things probably would have wound up a bit different.

No matter, though. Vash clicks the feed back on in the middle of the two creatures trying to pull Vash's sleeves off and tie them together. Normal creature things.]

Aw, nah! I don't want to rough them up for expressing themselves! Besides, they're not hurting me! Not, uh, badly, at least! It seems like good fun!

[gachatia]

That's entirely valid, but then again, I don't think a thorough battle would be necessary to dissuade such situations.

[Like if you just wanted to try and spook 'em a little and not hurt anybody that's always a possibility.]

[video]

[sinningtree]

I'm afraid whatever you're doing seems to only be encouraging the behavior.

By famous do you mean infamous for similar antics? If they're well known for acting this way, surely someone must have a solution after dealing with them previously.

[If they're not known for this it actually sounds rather personal, but he keeps that part to himself. At least, for now.]

[oleaeuropaea]

I'm not - doing anything! I try to let Pokemon do their own thing!

[Vash's video clicks back on to the Grafaiai attempting to use his hair as reins. Vash, meanwhile, is laying with his chin propped on the ground.]

I guess you could say infamous. Either way, a few folks around Goldenrod seem to know them! They even have names! [A wince.] War and strife? Can you believe that - for such - charming little guys!

[He rolls onto his back. The Grafaiai scrambles away.]

[sinningtree]

Sometimes the absence of an action is no different. It seems you're simply their latest target, regardless.

[In a string of many. Kurama's getting the distinct feeling he should avoid those two while in the city, so that much is helpful, for him at least. Sorry Vash.

It seems contradictory that Vash is defending them after asking for assistance in resolving the issue, but he can't help the faint smirk given in response to those words.]

Yes, charming. The names are not ill-fitting, though. If you've offended them perhaps a truce could be obtained by offering a little food?

[Honestly, he was assuming Vash tried that already, but it didn't hurt to ask.]

[oleaeuropaea]

[Ultimately, Vash wants to hope that someone has an idea he hasn't thought about. While he would appreciate a little reprieve from the constant pranking, he doesn't want to discourage what they seem to take joy in. And he hasn't been severely injured, either. Sure, he's bonked his head after having his shoelaces tied together a few times, but he's next to certain Pokemon could do far worse.]

Food isn't a bad idea. I'm sure they've swiped a few berries out of my bag, but maybe I can get my pal to cook something up. He's real good at it and -

[There's a yelp as Vash's head is pulled back by the Grafaiai.]

Is that a yes? A no? Buddy, I really can't tell with you!

[sinningtree]

[Unfortunately, Kurama hasn't been here long enough to have anything of use figured out. He's been lucky enough not to run into them during his stay though, which also means no basis for understanding what Vash is dealing with. One more thing to look into. He winces in sympathy with the yelp, trying to get a good look at the Pokémon in question as it tugs his head back.]

Yes, that certainly sounds like a good idea, maybe you'll earn a bit of reprieve while they're otherwise occupied. Is your friend there with you, now? If so, it rather seems as though they prefer your attention.

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[crystalmaster]

Yikes.

[Radley has never encountered them, but Goldenrod is a large city.

"Eevee-vee?" says Evie. Maybe she could talk to them!]

How long has this been going on?

[oleaeuropaea]

[Vash's feed comes back eventually. The creatures have calmed down, now wrestling themselves within Vash's hood at least. He offers a sheepish grin, and when he speaks, does so in a whisper. Better to not remind them that he's there.]

Few weeks, nothin' too bad! I'm sure they're just riled up and'll calm down soon.

[crystalmaster]

... A few weeks, huh? Like since the beginning of the month?

[Radley sighs to himself. It seems like there's always a rash of weird things in January....]

[oleaeuropaea]

Uhh, yep! I guess since then, yeah!

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[nightyorb]

Can't you just beat them and chase 'em off? In a pokemon battle, I mean.

[Riz isn't suggesting physical violence against pokemon! Yet!]

[oleaeuropaea]

Ah, well. I mean, I could but...

[Battle seems to set the Impidimp off. He chitters some more, before going to hide somewhere. The Grafaiai eventually follows his lead, leaving only the occasional sound of fabric tearing here and there to fill the air.]

They're just messin' around, right? Feels a little bad to beat them up for it.

[nightyorb]

I guess.

How about a trap then? You wouldn't need to make it dangerous at all. You could catch them and then release them a far away from where you are.

[Riz is no good at making friends, but he is excellent at devising traps.]

[oleaeuropaea]

I could, that's an option. [He sounds a little unsure about it, visibly grimacing the longer he weighs it in his head.]

This is their home, though. And the folks in the neighborhood seem fond enough. Usually they're just more... spread out with their bullying, I guess.

In any case, I'd feel bad abandoning them away from their homes.