Heather Mason (
foolishwren) wrote in
victory_road2023-02-03 03:58 pm
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[Video, SLIGHTLY backdated to the last week of January]
[DING! It's a video post!]
[The video is pointed downwards at the front stoop of a house. Where there seems to be a respectably-sized pile of oblong objects. The camera wavers slightly as it comes into focus on the pile.]
[... It's bread.]
[Loaves of all shapes, colors, and sizes, just... dumped right on the doormat.]
[We're talking everything from the Johto equivalent of Wonderbread to rustic artisanal bakery items.]
[Then the camera's view swings back around to Heather; bleary-eyed, slightly grouchy, and clearly just woke up to find, for the umpteenth time this month, that the secret bread fairy had once again visited her place of residence.]
[All things considered, it's one of the less alarming, more harmless stalker-style pranks she's experienced.]
[But that doesn't make it any less baffling.]
WHO. IS DOING THIS.
[The video is pointed downwards at the front stoop of a house. Where there seems to be a respectably-sized pile of oblong objects. The camera wavers slightly as it comes into focus on the pile.]
[... It's bread.]
[Loaves of all shapes, colors, and sizes, just... dumped right on the doormat.]
[We're talking everything from the Johto equivalent of Wonderbread to rustic artisanal bakery items.]
[Then the camera's view swings back around to Heather; bleary-eyed, slightly grouchy, and clearly just woke up to find, for the umpteenth time this month, that the secret bread fairy had once again visited her place of residence.]
[All things considered, it's one of the less alarming, more harmless stalker-style pranks she's experienced.]
[But that doesn't make it any less baffling.]
WHO. IS DOING THIS.
no subject
Park it right next to the front steps until this stops happening up and the bread would just be gone before we even saw it.
no subject
That would be convenient.
I guess it couldn't hurt to look it up.
no subject
Anybody else reply with any theories? Or a confession?
no subject
Just an unnervingly large number of people who openly admitted that they'd eat this bread.
no subject
That's something Wrath would've done.
[He wishes Wrath were still here to eat the ground bread :(]
no subject
[The house is a lot quieter without that kid around.]
[But she doesn't say much else-- she knows that's still a sort of sensitive topic.]
Anyway, uh... mostly people seem to think it's a Pokemon.
no subject
Weren't there a bunch of those little ice guys running around?
no subject
Some, uh, people suggested that too.
[SHE IS LIKE 99% SURE THEY WERE THE REASON SHE GOT CANCELED ON CHATTER THAT ONE TIME]
[BUT THIS IS SO PETTY]
[WHY BREAD]
no subject
[ICE TYPE REPELLANT]
no subject
... Except then we'd probably have to explain to Lust why the power bill is shooting straight off the graph, wouldn't we.