victory_road | video; A Blitz Kirschtein Production

Entry tags:

video; A Blitz Kirschtein Production

[The communicator comes on with an audible zap. It’s obvious why a moment later, when a very cranky, very round face peers down into the screen. It’s Blitz the Electrode, terror to all who know him, looking exceptionally disgruntled, even for him. He makes some annoyed crackling sounds, and someone moans off screen.]

Go chase wild Pokemon if you need something to do, just stop making noise…

[Blitz rolls his eyes at the camera, then ducks down to pick up the communicator in his mouth. The image jars around a bit as the Electrode moves it, showing, amongst other things: a startled Torracat face; a pair of sneakers discarded under a bed; a backpack that has very clearly been dug through by some greedy Pokemon looking for treats. It finally settles on a bed, with its blankets all tossed and crumpled. The bed’s inhabitant isn’t visible, except for a shock of tangled, ashy blond hair, and one long, skinny arm sticking out from under the covers.]

[Blitz crackles again, and the blankets shift.]

I said go away!

[The blankets move, and Jean peers out from underneath them. His hair is standing up in all directions, his eyes are so puffy they’re almost swollen shut, and his nose is bright red and dripping.]
 The hell do you…

[His voice trails off and his eyes widen, as much as they’re able, when he sees what Blitz has.]

Blitz, no! That better not be recording, I swear to…

[Jean reaches for the communicator, and Blitz makes a smug sound as he rolls backwards, out of reach.]

Jean?

[Another voice, this one equally weak and clogged up.]

Jean, what’s going on?

[Jean shoots a wild-eyed look over his shoulder, and Blitz helpfully hops up to show there’s another bed in the room, similarly inhabited by another teenager and a curled up Arcanine.]

Nothing! Nothing’s going on!

[Jean turns back to Blitz, and there’s pure murder on his face now.]

You give me that communicator, you fat ball of plastic, or I swear to the gods…

[OOC: Sharing is caring and Bertolt gave his plague cold to Jean, so answers could come from Jean or Bertolt or both! ~~or even Blitz, if anyone wants to talk to him~~]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

_{[And very soft blankets, too!]}

Mm... It doesn't matter, does it?

_{[Rubbing his face against the pillow, Bertolt gives Marcel's butt a little nudge with his foot.]}

If you really want it, make Marcel do it.

_{[He is not moving, okay.]}

[Look, Bertolt, just because you ~~are still pining over Reiner or Annie or both, it's impossible to tell~~ don't care about finding a girlfriend doesn't mean that nobody cares!]

If you want everyone in the world to see you when you're sick, then sure, it doesn't matter.

[Jean does not want that, and lunges at Blitz, almost falling out of the bed when the Electrode moves backwards.]

Marcel, help me!

[Marcel lifts his head and looks at Jean, then at Bertolt. Does he really have to get up?]

_{[He is never going to find that special someone, but still!]}

You're never going to get better if you keep at it like this, though.

_{[He knows illnesses, though part of Bertolt is worried that this might be Something Worse than a cold. He's not going to say anything about that though! ...Well, not unless he starts getting nosebleeds and whatnot.]}

_{[Squinting a little at Marcel, he gives his butt another nudge. Goooooo, make Jean be quiet and do the thing.]}

Get the ball, Marcel.

_[Fetch!]

[What, is Jean going to start getting nosebleeds now? What kind of terrible death plague did you give him, Bertolt?]

So I'll die how I lived, then!

[Desperately and fruitlessly trying to get someone to love him? Jean, you didn't think that one through very well...]

[Marcel sighs and clambers down off Bertolt's bed, making the mattress springs creak loudly at the sudden decrease in weight. He starts advancing on Blitz, who narrows his eyes at him and retreats to a corner. Someone did not appreciate being called a ball, thank you very much! And if Marcel tries to pick him up in his mouth, Blitz is going to shock the shit out of him.]

If you just give me the communicator, he won't sit on you.

[Blitz crackles, rolls his eyes... and, miraculously, drops the communicator. Marcel picks it up and prances over to Jean, depositing it neatly on his bed.]

Oh. Uh, thank you.

_{[The worst of terrible death plagues, of course.]}

I, uh... I don't think you lived in a puddle of your own sweat with snot everywhere.

_{[Unless somehow, Bertolt went blind! Though if he could notice Reiner sweating buckets on a hot day, he's pretty sure he'd have noticed Jean like that too.

With the pokegear retrieved and on Jean's bed, Marcel sits down and licks at the air with a wet thlorp, his ears perking up as if he's trying to fully interpret Jean's words. Thank you was always a good thing, right? Did he do the Good Boy Thing? He did, didn't he? But that's not a proper thank you, is it? It is not.

Deciding to take matters into his own paws and get a proper one, Marcel plants both of his front paws on the edge of Jean's bed and with a low grumble, effortlessly 'crawls' up the rest of the way and stretches himself across his legs. Come on, give him a proper thank you! Right behind the ears or under the chin will be just fine!]}

[Was that... was that a joke? Was that a mean joke? Good heavens, Jean must be rubbing off on Bertolt if he's making mean jokes about bodily fluids!]

[The improvement in Bertolt's character is almost enough to have Jean perk up again, but that's before Marcel decides to climb onto the bed with him. And here's the thing: none of Jean's Pokemon are really all that big. Blitz is small for an Electrode, Polo has grown but still isn't much larger than an average sized dog, and Lila is the size of a big rat. Blume is big but far too polite to climb onto a bed, and Fisch is huge but isn't and never has been a cuddly Pokemon. In short, Jean isn't used to four hundred pound dogs, and he certainly isn't used to them deciding they want to cuddle.]

Aaaaagh!

[Jean's lower half disappears under a pile of fluff, and Marcel puts his head down on his paws, looking up at Jean expectantly. Well? Make with the pets, human!]

Bertolt! Your dog is on my bed!

[Blitz cackles merrily from his corner. You've gotten what you've deserved, Dumb Narrow! Feel the wrath of Tall Nervous's big dumb dog!]

_{[He gets a little cranky when he's sicker than a dog - just ask Reiner about how many times he's had to put up with a touch of salt from the usually quiet and polite Bertolt. Thankfully there never has been any genuine malice behind any of it, plus he likes to think that everyone else knows him well enough to know it.

Especially Reiner.

Though when he catches sight of Marcel in Jean's bed, Bertolt grumbles a quiet 'traitor' and pulls his blanket up to his nose - at least up until Marcel decides the pets aren't coming fast enough, prompting him to lightly thump at the mattress with one of his paws and make a sound mixed between a whine and a growl. Is there a bear in here? There has to be a bear, right?

...Unfortunately, it's enough to get a snort and a tired laugh, up until it dissolves into a cough.]}

H-He wants something from you, Jea-- _{[Give him a minute here! He's just. Sort of trying not to die.]} Gods-- I-I'm okay, I think... He just wants something from you.

[If this is Bertolt being salty, then he has a lot to learn. This is barely salty at all, and Jean has much to teach him. Besides, Bertolt gets sick so rarely that Jean has hardly ever even noticed him being ill.]

[The noise from Marcel makes Jean jump, and he leans away from the Pokemon, looking at Bertolt from out of the corner of his eye.]

Why is he making that sound?

[That sounds like an "I'm going to tear your throat out" kind of sound.]

What does he want?

[A scratch? Another thank you? Jean's tender, supple flesh rending between his jaws? What?]

_{[If Bertolt were anyone else, he may have made a crack along the lines of 'forgetting that Jean only spoke horse', but even he found that line of teasing a little mean. Bertolt didn't even like being dragged into it, but peer pressure was a nasty thing (and he did try to make it up to him when he did let himself get swept up in it all).]}

He's always made that sound.

_{[Especially when he was a little tiny Growlithe and was taking out his energy on Bertolt's shoelaces at night. How many did he have to replace? Too many.]}

...My head hurts too much to translate it.

_{[AKA "I know but I'm not saying anything."]}

[That's mean, Bertolt, and would make Jean retract his previous feelings of pride at your saltiness. Besides, Jean doesn't even have any horse Pokemon, how would he practice his horse skills if he doesn't have anyone to talk to?]

I don't remember him making that sound.

[Or maybe Jean just didn't realize how much bigger it would sound with a fully grown Arcanine instead of a cute little Growlithe.]

[Marcel makes the noise again and wiggles a little closer, looking up at Jean plaintively. His tongue swipes out and drags across one of Jean's hands, which makes him jump and pull it back.]

He licked me!

[No, okay, Jean has seen Marcel lick Bertolt before. It's a good thing when a dog licks you, right? Tentatively, Jean reaches out and pets the top of Marcel's head.]

Does he just want to be petted?

_{[He saves his mean side for only the worst of people, so Jean can rest in peace about that.]}

He's done it for as long as I've had him, trust me. ...Or at least for as long as we've been traveling together.

_{[Before he met up with Jean and Armin, there wasn't much growling and shoelace-eating to be had. He was a quieter puppy back then! Quieter, but nowhere near as clingy as he is now.

Bertolt can't hide the snort that turns into another cough, sniffing loudly under his blanket.]}

He's tasting you. Before he eats you, I mean.

_{[A beat, and another snort.]}

...He might drool on you, but that's about it, actually.

_{[And drool he does - while waiting for Jean to actually pet him, Marcel licks at the air and lets a big ol' glob of slobber drop from his jowls. Come on, pet! Pet him!]}

Ewwwww!

[The giant plop of drool lands in Jean's lap, and he's disgusted in only the way a sheltered only child can be.]

Marcel, that's gross!

[See, this is why Jean is a cat person. Polo would never do this!]

[Speaking of which, Polo hops up onto the bed and climbs onto Marcel's lap, settling down into a cat loaf and kneading his paws in Marcel's floof.]

Polo, you traitor.

[Jean starts rubbing Marcel's head, and while it's not exactly a good pet, it's better than nothing. He can't help it: Blitz and Polo prefer rougher affection, and that's what Jean is used to.]

If I pet you and tell you you're a good dog for getting my communicator back, will you get off my legs and stop slobbering on me?

_{[Jean, pls. If he keeps trying to not laugh he is going to hack up a lung or his tonsils from coughing.]}

It's not that gross, Jean.

_{[Though there's a reason why Marcel wears one of his old shirts around his neck sometimes. Bertolt figures if he can't fix it, he may as well turn it into a makeshift drool-bib for the big lug so he doesn't slobber all over himself!

When he feels Polo settle on his back legs, Marcel twists back a little to give him a head tilt before practically shoving his head into Jean's hand at the rubbing. Pets are good, but he wants more. More pets, now.]}

...Gods, if anyone's a traitor, it's Marcel.

_{[Though Jean probably hasn't seen how rough Bertolt gets when he starts roughhousing with Marcel. There's never any yelps from either one, but with how hard it sounds like they hit the ground it's a miracle nothing gets broken when they wrestle.]}

It's gross.

[Finito, end. Dog drool is nasty, and this is why Jean's fire Pokemon is a cat. Admittedly, though, Marcel is pretty cute when he's got Bert's shirt tied around his neck like a bandana. Very jaunty.]

Oh, for gods' sake...

[Jean gets his other hand up and starts scruffing Marcel's ears, really digging in behind them and scratching. Marcel's tail waves back and forth, and he drops his head to the top of Jean's thighs to enjoy the petting. There, now those are pets!]

He likes it rough, doesn't he?

You're gross.

_{[At least Bertolt doesn't have to worry about hairballs that smell like... well, burnt hair, right?

Bertolt shifts so he can face Jean properly, but he still doesn't move to sit up. Even rolling over stings his skin and makes his joints ache, but it's better than making his neck stiff.]}

But, ah... Put it this way, if you ever play with him outside, you really have to use every ounce of your body weight against him. _{[Did his voice start cracking again? It's totally cracking. He's so going to lose his voice come morning, or whenever he falls back asleep.]}

At least I don't lick my own butt at the end of the day.

[Which, in all fairness, Polo does too.]

Yeah, no. He'd probably crush me. I'm not as strong as you are.

[Jean's thing has always been being fast, and he knows it. He's not complaining, just stating a fact: he's quicker than almost anyone when he's using his gear, and Bertolt is probably second only to Reiner for sheer power and strength.]

[When he hears Bertolt's voice crack, Jean glances over at him.]

Do you need more honey tea? You're starting to sound like shit again.

If he didn't want to move, I'm sure I couldn't make him budge. He weighs twice as much as Reiner, maybe a little more. ...I think with how he is though, a toddler could push on his leg and he'd flop over.

_{[He'd be a very good family-oriented dog, let's put it that way!

Bertolt shakes his head a little, forcing a cough to try and clear his throat once. Gods, it feels awful but it works just a bit.]}

I'll be okay. I'll get some later.

I'm not going to ask how you know exactly how much Reiner weighs.

[Because Jean knows, he's seen the two of them wrestle and goof around and carry each other back and forth during drills. It's much like how he knows exactly how much his own best friend had weighed. It's just weird that Bertolt can use Reiner as a unit of measurement.]

You sound like shit now, though.

[Jean nudges Marcel.]

C'mon, boy, get off my legs. I'm going to go make some tea.

I think you know the answer to it already.

_{[He can lift Reiner with relative ease, but Marcel? Marcel is Too Much. He can lift his front half up if he's laying down and acting like a sack of potatoes, but not much else. He's nowhere near that strong, nor has he met anyone who could lift something that heavy.

Normally, anyway.]}

Armin'll kill us if he catches us out of bed.

_{[Except he knows he won't - he's just being stubborn. Marcel, on the other hand, rolls over with a low groan, more than likely disturbing poor Polo in the process.]}

Yeah, those crazy pushups you do with him on your back! I still don't know how you managed to not snap your spine doing that.

[If Reiner sat on Jean, he'd be crushed. Full stop, no more Jean.]

Well, Armin isn't here right now, and you need some tea.

[Jean's legs are freed when Marcel rolls over--making the bed springs squall again--but Polo goes rolling ass over teakettle, and pops up from behind Marcel's fluff, looking furious.]

That's what happens when you go to sleep on someone. Come on, you can help me heat up the water.

Jean, I'll be fine. I...

_{[His brows furrow and Bertolt worries at his bottom lip for a few moments.]}

I feel too warm for anything hot right now, anyway. I just need to take things easy.

Then I'm getting myself some tea, and you some water.

[Jean is on a mission! He staggers to his feet with a blanket wrapped around his shoulder, and Polo hops down onto the floor beside him after shooting a furious glare Marcel's way.]

We'll be fine. You just stay put.

[Jean starts making his way, laborious way towards the kitchen, with Polo dogging at his heels.]

_{[Bertolt groans, low and strained as he turns over in his bed and pulls his blankets up over his head. He knows everyone means well, but having people 'fuss' still makes him uneasy.

It still makes him feel a little awkward when Reiner does it, and that's saying something. It's got to be the attention.]}

M'fiiiiiine...

_{[Marcel, on the other hand, takes a deep breath and lets it out in a big huff before he rolls himself off of the bed to pad after Jean. He's had to lean against Bertolt when he'd stand up so he didn't wobble over, and even he can tell Jean is just as sick - it won't do any of them any good if they fall and hurt themselves, right?]}

[Jean ignores Bertolt's pathetic whimpering and keeps moving towards the kitchen. When Marcel steps up beside him, Jean leans gratefully against the big Arcanine, earning himself a glare from Polo.]

When you evolve again and get bigger, you can do this instead. For now, I need his help.

[To Marcel:]

Thank you. Good boy.

[That sets Marcel's tail wagging. Who's a good boy? HE IS! HE'S THE GOOD BOY!]

_{[IT IS HIM, THE GOODEST BOY THAT EVER GOODED. By golly, it's enough to get him prancing on his front feet and toss in a couple woo-woos. He is the only good boy and nothing can ever out-good him!

In fact, he is SO GOOD that he is going to plop his head down on the counter and snuffle his head over to the bagel bag with the last remaining one in it. Good boys get this, right? He is a good boy so he should get the good bagel.]}

video; A Blitz Kirschtein Production

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Re: Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Re: Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Action;

Re: Action;

Action;

Re: Action;

Action;

Action;

Action; dammit, I need some Pokeicons