victory_road | 004. Video

_{[The entire screen is black and white as it pans across a backyard. Everything's buried under a good foot of snow, and big fat flakes are whirling past the camera so fast that they straight-up pixelate.]}

So... for those just tuning in...

_{[The camera's view jerks very suddenly to a massively fluffy Growlithe, who is very carefully sniffing the base of a completely snow-covered shrub.]}

... We're going for the fifteen-minute mark on Cooj TAKING HIS SWEET-ASS TIME FIGURING OUT WHERE TO PEE.

For the love of GOD, Cujo.

_{[He looks back at the camera, big pink tongue lolling out, and shakes off, spraying half-melted snow everywhere. Then he moves on to one of the patio chairs, along with the lumpy, weird-looking snowman from earlier that afternoon cheekily posed to be sitting in it-- to give that the once-over with his nose instead. And the trainer behind the camera lets out a melodramatic sigh.]}

What crime did I commit in a past life to deserve thi--

_{[and right then and there the video turns to a blur, because the snowman in the patio chair just stood up and Heather is LEAVING RIGHT NOW BECAUSE FUCK THAT COOJ YOU CAN PEE ON YOUR OWN]}

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Sounds just as good as it does bad. I mean, I live to be boredom-free but then again, sometimes I just wanna kick back and BBQ in peace without you know

Killer snowmen or whatever it is.

That doesn't really account for if some jerk tries to shove his fist in your face, does it? Wouldn't sit right by me having a pokemon in the line of fire, even if it'd bust someone's hand up good. People are people and they aren't all altruistic. It's not like we seem to be brought here with a discerning eye, either...

Exactly

Actually another thing you'll find is that the police here aren't really equipped to deal with human violence

When all of us (you know, people from other worlds) started showing up here about seven years ago, they REALLY didn't know what to do with us

I'd say they've gotten a little better with time but let's be real they usually need us to solve the real big issues

A lot of pros/cons to that. I mean it means you're less likely to find native folk starting anything up, right? I don't think they'd be woefully under-prepared if there wasn't reason for it. On the other hand, who knows what kind of people are getting dragged over here? I mean there's some solid people like you and I but even strange forces of nature make mistakes.

(I'm sure you're waiting for a joke here, but I don't have one.)

But if they've been dealing with this for seven years, you'd think they'd take precautions against the off-chance that someone is a psychopath. Or, you know. Killer snowmen.

At least that doesn't seem to change. And here I thought this was going to be a nice little vacation!

Well haha don't get me wrong I've definitely gotten into my fair share of scrapes with the locals, sometimes there are people who don't take kindly to losing Pokemon battles and decide they'd rather start throwing punches than Pokeballs

But as a general rule yeah, if anyone's gonna REALLY start trouble, most of the time it's either us or one of the like

actual legitimate high profile criminal organizations

Who, for the record, I'm pretty sure don't usually employ killer snowmen

this place isn't always like this I swear

Somehow, I'm not surprised to hear that. Guess after seven years, you're probably a pretty strong trainer, though! Can imagine you might cheese some people off.

[ That's right, pal! Cheese. This is what you've signed up for, it's your own fault. At least she hasn't started punning yet. ]

I've heard a bit of talk about that, but nothing else. Is it likely that I'll run into them?

Though I get the feeling with how elusive those organizations seem, it might be more likely that I'll run into killer snowmen. Good thing Chris got us a fire type, though I get the feeling it'll take a little longer for it to melt one than your pal might.

"Isn't always" can mean a lot of things, you know.

haha well not to BRAG but I HAVE won all eight Johto badges, my team and I can definitely hold our own

but uh yeah, there's various criminal gangs-- Team Rocket's the big one we've had to deal with in the past

there were also some like... ecoterrorist guys from another region who came over to generally cause havoc a couple of years ago, but we kicked their asses pretty good

but yeah fire types are a good thing to have around in GENERAL

if only to stay warm while traveling in the cold weather

Guess I know who to go to if I need the 4-1-1 on any of the gyms. That's definitely impressive!

Sounds like a Sunday morning cartoon from the mid-80s. Or maybe with puppets. Figure they're probably not as cute.

Seems like a lot of the normal, obvious element types are useful. Psychic seems like it could come in handy, but I've heard a lot of weird stuff about ghost types.

Definitely a plus. The bonus is I get to watch Chris brushing a Fennekin's tail and fretting over if he did it right.

OH yeah I can give you all the deets (first one's free: Falkner's a weenie)

And uh yeah you heard right, some people love ghost-types but honestly I don't feel like they're worth the trouble. The BEST ones I've met are all huge pains in the ass

_{[She's gotten a LOT of angry messages from people after Slightly had gotten hold of her 'Gear for an hour or two...]}

and oh cool, he's got a Fennkin? I have one of those

She's a little fussy but cute

Ha, he seems that way. I wasn't exactly ready to face him when I first passed through, though. Team of one wouldn't have been smart.

"Best" as in strong or something else? Do you know anything about Sharpedo? They look amazing, but a little scary. Plus the whole fish out of water thing weirds me out so I might as well stick with my "theme".

Even if they seem pretty amazing.

[ She'll just be enamored from afar. Much like children, it's always easier to be the cool aunt than it is the parent. ]

You seem to like fire types to me! But yeah, I think he just kind of went for the first one he saw and also thought we'd both like. Plus, it's pretty handy when it comes to cleaning up our fire pits. Just pack up the leftovers for snacks...

Yeah his seems that way, too. Especially about grooming... Plays him well, even and he doesn't seem to notice. He was carrying around this sling for Stufful so it wouldn't flail and hit him, but now he's basically just carrying around our teams. I think he'd tell you it's to keep up his strength training or they "make him" but I'm pretty sure he just likes it.

"Best" as in "most likely to be an independent agent of evil as opposed to working directly for Satan"

_{[YEAH, HEATHER DOESN'T LIKE GHOSTS]}

Sharpedos are great though, they look scary but we keep a bunch of them in the pool, they're tame as bunnies. Or well, ours are at least. I guess if you run into one in the wild maybe don't try to snuggle it immediately.

And as for fire... wellllllllll

_{[Even now, she can't really say she likes fire. But...]}

I'm used to it, I guess you could say. Somehow wound up with a bunch anyhow.

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