[ video / action for saffron city jenny station if you feel like it ]

[meteorman]

[It's been a while since Ford has made a post of his own to the network. He's been busy with one thing after another. Primarily he's been focused on getting his Aurora League gym all set up and ready to go. More recently there was all the business with the Ultra Beasts and Aether to be dealing with.

Most recently, as a result of that business, he stormed into the Silph Co. building in Saffron and got himself dragged out again by the Jennies. So now here he is in a jail cell on charges of resisting arrest that he probably could have avoided if he wasn't a Pines and didn't have a natural inclination toward crime. Why does he still have his gear? It took him nearly fifteen minutes just to empty out most of his coat pockets and by that time the Jennies were over it.]

Greetings! I have an announcement to make. For those of you who haven't met me, my name is Dr. Stanford Pines, and about a year ago I began construction on the Horizon Gym on Johto Route 36. That construction has finally been completed. The grand opening is going to be postponed until such time as I can post bail. My plan is to have the museum doors unlocked by next Tuesday, with official challenges beginning on the Wednesday after.

[Why did he not wait until that Tuesday (and bail) to make this announcement? Because he's Ford Pines and, like everyone in his family, he can't be contained by a jail for very long. If his crime wasn't so minor he probably would have broken out by now, but relatively it's not worth the effort or the subsequent warrant for re-arrest. It's not like he can dodge that by skipping out on this universe, which used to be his go-to.]

I had planned to do something over Halloween, but as you can imagine those plans fell through. That was really my mistake. Halloween has never gone to plan in this universe and I don't know why I thought it would this year.

In the meantime I will be taking questions because, as you can imagine, I'm incredibly bored.

[He means about the gym-and-museum, but 'why are you in jail' or 'aren't you that guy with the Ninetales I keep seeing memes of' are valid questions.]

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[shiro2hero]

...





Ford.

I told you so.

[meteorman]

I was being very polite.

[He was not.]

[shiro2hero]

Were you?

[Bruh...]

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[raygunner]

[ .... he's curious about the gym--a museum, huh--but more importantly-- ]

They allow you to keep your gear while in jail?

[ He can't keep the slightly judgmental note out of his voice, though. ]

[meteorman]

I completely filled up the tub they were having me empty my pockets into before I got to it and I think we all mutually agreed that was enough.

[It's not like they don't know who he is and don't know he's relatively harmless, if very weird. They probably had to weigh procedure against how annoying it was going to be and came to the only conclusion that wasn't going to drive them nuts.]

[raygunner]

... I assume they're familiar with you, otherwise I have serious concerns about the justice system here.

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[pkemeter]

[Egon's not going to comment on Ford being in jail, because he's been in his exact position before. Almost half a year before, actually, but it was more because he accidentally exploded something while working on Important Scientific Things. Instead, he decides to take the opportunity to inquire about he's been meaning to ask for a few months.]

Doctor Pines. Good to see that you are well after the incident at the Aether Foundation.

["Well" as in, like, not dying.]

I do have a general question unrelated to the gym--I heard that you have a metal plate installed in your head to prevent against possible psychic attacks and other psychokinetic phenomena. I was wondering if you would be able to share your methods, as I am interested in performing a similar procedure on myself sometime in the future. Protecting your brain's basic functions is a necessity in my line of work, after all.

[Please do not tell him. It would be very bad.]

[meteorman]

[Oh boy. This is going to go bad in record time and not even for the reason one would assume.]

Ah, well. I can tell you what little I remember of the process, but I was unconscious for most of it. There's also a strong possibility that the metal is alien in origin and not of a kind you can find locally, considering it was an alien that performed the procedure.

[Which isn't technically true: he was the alien in that situation. She was in her native dimension, perfectly normal and at home. But he's found that quibbling over that kind of distinction just confuses people.]

[pkemeter]

[Oh boy. He said that word. Egon pauses for a moment, arching an eyebrow in disbelief. It's incredibly unfortunate that Ford missed Egon's earlier post when he was trying to prove a point to Ray, which is that--]

Aliens don't exist.

[Egon delivers the sentence in an incredibly deadpan manner, as simply as he were stating a fact. Surely, a proficient scientist such as Stanford Pines wouldn't make such a mistake, would he?]

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[ghoststanning]

Gee, the police in this dimension sure are quick on arresting, huh.

[Don't worry Ford he's on your side.]

But I'm excited for the gym! I can't wait for my rematch where I kick your butt.

[meteorman]

Don't count your Torchic before they hatch.

[See what he did there?]

And actually it's taken them four years to arrest me which I think may be some sort of personal best.

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[lioness_rampant]

[ Now here's Allura on the gear screen, looking every bit the magical space elf princess she is. Klaizap the rattata is settled on her shoulder, nibbling on a berry. ]

What type of badge will your Horizon Gym be offering, Doctor Pines?

[meteorman]

[Finally, someone who's not here to scold him or tell him aliens don't exist. What a nice change of pace.]

I call it the Voyager Badge. It looks like a little space ship.

[tookashirototheknee]

Ooh. Shiro and I will have to come see your museum, and I'm sure he'll want to challenge you.

[Professor Holt is not very good at battling.]

What are you exhibiting?

[meteorman]

[Fight him anyway, he's got a baby team for a reason! And it'd be cute. Low stress. Just two science guys having a little friendly fight before dad and grandpa throw down.]

Most recently I arranged for an entire section on man-made ancient Pokémon. The research centers primarily on Golett and Golurk, but Baltoy and Claydol are also featured, as is what precious little we know about Magearna.

[So like... next to nothing. But that's what makes it interesting!]

It makes a good complete set with the exhibit on modern Pokémon created by or influenced by human intervention.

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[starry_forehead]

[Every member of the Pines family will end up in jail here eventually. All of them for really petty/silly reasons.]

Do you need any help "posting bail"

[Yes those were finger quotes. Breaking out of jail is another tradition, right?]

i'm sorry to send you a Sad Tag but I gotta address this on-screen

[meteorman]

[In the time it takes for Ford to hit 'reply', Dipper's Pokégear goes offline. Number not found. Ford's stomach drops into his shoes. After as many family members as he's seen come and go it's not a surprise, necessarily, but that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt. He already wasn't planning on breaking out and now he probably wouldn't have it in him to try if he wanted to.

So. No Dipper, no Mabel. Fiddleford long gone. Never a Stanley, which he's grateful for at this point. But it isn't as though he's alone. Somehow despite himself he's managed to cultivate a truly huge extended family here. This is possibly the least alone he's ever been in his life, even with his entire blood family so many worlds away.

He'll be fine, with time.]

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[schachmeister]

[Armin opens his mouth to ask why Ford is in jail, then thinks better of it. He's a Pines. It is what they do.]

A museum? What sort of museum?

[meteorman]

[See, Armin knows what's important.]

A museum of oddities! [WHAT ELSE...] This world has so many unsolved mysteries and unexplored corners. For goodness sake, we still have no conclusive answer as to where Pokémon eggs come from.

My aim is to catalog unanswered questions or little-known anomalies. As far as I'm aware I'm one of the few scientists focused on doing so.

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[tearsofademon]

Ahh, Route 36, huh? That's not all that far from Ecruteak...

[and you mention a museum]

Could be worth a visit, once things settle down from opening day and all.

[meteorman]

[The museum is really the draw. He wants nothing more than to trap people into learning about his weird pet theories about Pokémon.]

Ecruteak is one of my favorite towns in Johto. I couldn't in good conscience set up a permanent residence too far away from it. As it stands I'm equidistant from Ecruteak, Violet, and the Ruins of Alph. It's the perfect spot.

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[dreamsofahero]

Ah, I suppose congratulations for a new fellow gym leader are in order. Ryner and I will undoubtedly have to pay a visit sometime.

*just maybe not on opening day. Unless Ford wants the extra attention and/or chaos having visiting gym leaders would bring...*

[meteorman]

[Chaos is definitely not an issue for him. The fact that he's broadcasting from a jail cell probably speaks to that. This is a rough and tumble sort of grandpa.]

Appreciated. You're more than welcome to stop by any time you like. The more opponents I have on which to test the composition of my Elite team, the better.

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[marmoron]

What do you get for beating the gym?

[meteorman]

That depends on which team you defeat. But judging by your age I imagine the Junior team is a little below your skill level.

[He designed it for like... babies. Schoolbabies.]

Against the Regular or Elite teams you'll earn a badge (of course), a fair bit of money, and a Weakness Policy.