victory_road | [closed] a very late catch all for november-december

[At the sound of Felix's knocking, there's more sounds from within - stumblings, things being hastily put away, the pitter patter of many rat feet, on and on.]

[It's easy to tell when Dimitri is finally coming to the door; he's never been a particularly subtle person ever since he was a child. His heavy footsteps stumble over, and then he's peeking out with no small amount of surprise.]

Ah - hello, Felix. Did you give your gift to Sylvain?

[What is he doing in there? If it were anyone but Dimitri, Felix might have thought he'd interrupted something...inappropriate. As it is, he just has no idea.]

What? No, not yet. ...let me in. I brought your gifts.

[All Dimitri can do is... stare, for a second. Hearing those words feels as though it's too good to be true, as though he's dreaming. He'd rather hoped, when Felix had first mentioned getting gifts, that he would be a recipient... but it had felt as though it was too good to be true.]

[That had especially felt true when things had become so tense over the weekend, when they had put a stop to the Rockets. So for it to be like this...]

[He snaps out of it a second later, opening the door wider.]

I- of course. Come in.

[And if he is very clearly trying to hide something behind his back and sort of behind the door... Listen.]

[Felix steps inside, glancing back at Dimitri's...effort.]

...is whatever that is for me? [Then he shakes his head and shuts the door behind him, regardless of whether the things stay hidden or not; he's not paying attention to them right now or looking directly at Dimitri anyway.]

No, I'm going first. [Because if he doesn't, he might lose his nerve and leave. He hesitates with a frown. Should he start with the potions and work up to the real gift? No, then Dimitri might think that's all there is. Stop being a coward and get it over with, Fraldarius.

He pulls the little square box out of his pocket and thrusts both it and the bag of items toward Dimitri.]

Here. Happy...whatever this holiday is. And happy birthday, too.

[Trust Felix to cut him off before he can even answer affirmatively on if what he's hiding is for him or not. Dimitri doesn't have much time to think about that. Not before Felix is shoving over some gifts at him.]

[Not before he mentions Dimitri's birthday.]

[Dimitri had recalled that his birthday had come, after all. He'd noted it approaching a while ago, when he had realized this was the first month of winter. Yet... It had never occurred to him that the others would know. Would pay attention.]

[So much more has been happening, after all, and they already have a holiday which encourages gift giving. Surely it would be too much money to spend, or too much time to waste. Besides, he had gone for five years without paying mind to his birthday. He could go another.]

[His hand is trembling when he reaches out, leaving behind an awkwardly blanket bundle leaning against the wall. Dimitri stares down at the box and bag dumbfoundedly. When he looks back up to Felix... It takes a lot of willpower to do so.]

You... recalled my birthday?

[Felix doesn't often have a lot of patience for Dimitri, or for anyone else, but this time he just...waits. He doesn't comment on the trembling of the prince's hand or the look on his face, or how slowly he's taking his gifts. What Felix is about to do, to say, is too important to ruin before he's even started.

Besides, watching Dimitri's hand means he still has an excuse not to look him in the eye.

But at this question, he frowns.] Of course. We didn't spend all those years traveling to Fhirdiad with a carriage full of gifts for nothing. Why would I forget?

[It used to be one of Felix's favorite times of year. All of Fhirdiad celebrated the prince's birthday when King Lambert was still alive, of course, but the Fraldariuses always went a few days early and stayed a few days later so that the kids could celebrate on their own, too. Felix never wanted to give Dimitri his gift along with the rest of the Kingdom, so he'd make sure to do it the night before or the night after his actual birthday instead...]

It's belated, I guess. We were on the road on the 20th. Seemed like a waste to mention it then.

I didn't...

[Didn't think Felix would remember? Care? Want to indulge him? Dimitri trails off for a moment.]

...It has been a long time.

[But he supposes that is besides the point. Carefully keeping the gifts balanced in his arms, Dimitri goes to sit on the edge of his bed. There, Dean is already waiting, and leans over with open curiosity. Underneath a bed, four Rattata wiggle out for Reasons. They cluster around Dimitri's feet, also curious.]

[Dimitri decides to open the bag first - the safer option with the least chance of disaster occurring considering his issues with strength. Various healing items... He's quite familiar with them, considering how he looked into them before he challenged Falkner's Gym.]

Ah... These will all be very helpful, Felix. Thank you.

[Especially when he challenges the gym of this city... but that can be for later. For now, he hands off the bag and its contents to Dean, who keeps it all held close. With that done...]

[Dimitri takes a deep breath, and looks down at the box. This is the more challenging part... Hunched over the box resting on his lap, Dimitri carefully undoes any wrapping, delicately removes the top...]

[And finds himself unable to breathe.]

[It is a brooch, brilliantly silver and in the shape of a shield. That alone would have so much meaning behind it, at least for them, for Felix. But the Fraldarius Crest, etched into the metal...]

[That leaves no doubt.]

[Words leave Dimitri, and all he can do is look up at Felix with a wide, shining eye.]

[Felix just nods--it has been a long time. But even at the academy, Felix remembered Dimitri's birthday--of course he did. And then he nods again--you're welcome, it says, but he still doesn't speak, because the moment is drawing nearer and he's trying to keep it together.

And then Dimitri's opening the box, and now Felix watches him, standing awkwardly nearby where the prince is sitting and trying not to look like he's watching as closely as he is. But he can only withstand that wide-eyed look for a few seconds before he glances elsewhere, clearing his throat softly.]

...it's...look. This has nothing to do with any...tradition, or our heritage, or...your title, or whatever. Nothing to do with Glenn or my father. It's...just me. Because I want to. Got it?

[This isn't the clearest explanation he could have given, he's aware. He's not sure how to say the rest, though, or if Dimitri needs him to say the rest. ...well, it's Dimitri, so probably. He tries again, though his voice drops to something even quieter:]

I wouldn't...do this if I didn't think you were worth protecting. And I want to apologize. ...you're not a boar, Dimitri. You're...

[He's not sure where to go from there.]

You're not.

[You're not a boar, Dimitri.]

[It's funny. He had long gotten used to that harsh nickname from Felix, every since... Well, it's been a long time, now. Almost a decade. And it had felt fitting, honestly.]

[Of course he was a beast. Of course he was a violent boar, lance like tusks, bathed in blood. It had felt... as though he truly had someone who could properly judge him. And Felix made the most sense, didn't he...?]

[For so long, he's gotten used to it.]

[And suddenly it's gone.]

[Felix says he was wrong.]

[Dimitri barely realizes what the stinging behind his eye sockets signifies before the tears start to gather. He breathes in, finds himself choking, and he has to hand over the box to Dean as well so he doesn't crush it.]

[He's not sure what to do now, so his mind latches onto the next thing as he suddenly gets up onto his feet. A wobbly smile is starting to form on his lips.]

Then - I have been worrying about what I intended to give you, if it would match how you felt, but-

[But he doesn't have to worry. Seeming to recognize what's going on, the rat team dives underneath the bed again while Dimitri hurries over to what he wrapped in the blanket. It's not much of a wrapping job, but, well... He wasn't sure what to do there. Someone forgot about how this world has something called "wrapping paper".]

I know it cannot match up to the real thing, but I hope you like it regardless.

[Trying to ignore how he's definitely not on the verge of tears or anything, Dimitri holds out the long item towards Felix. Even before he fully unwraps the blanket, Felix might get an idea of what's inside judging by the shape of it: a wooden sword, simple but decently made, wrapped with leather around the handle.]

[Felix doesn't dare to look, even when he hears that strangled sound and knows what it means--he'd thought this might happen. It was either this, or...or Dimitri would tell him it was too little, too late, and turn him away. He swallows, trying not to think too hard about that other reality in which the prince didn't accept his offering or his lo-- ...his loyalty. The reality in which Felix had thoroughly burned his most precious bridge and left behind nothing but ashes.

But that didn't happen. Isn't happening. Instead, Dimitri's getting to his feet and talking about something--oh. Gifts. Right. Felix takes a breath he likes to think doesn't sound as shaky as it feels. Get it together.

Once he's reasonably sure of himself, he turns to see the prince handing him...a blanket wrapped around what is almost certainly a weapon. Unwrapping it gives him another excuse to put his eyes somewhere that isn't Dimitri, until he reveals the sword and lifts it by the hilt, dropping the blanket idly back onto the bed.

He takes a moment to heft it in his hand, test its balance, take a few careful practice swings. He gives it another look and nods in approval.]

It's weighted well. Much better than the sorry excuses for training swords in Goldenrod. Whoever made them has clearly never wielded a real weapon.

[Talking shop helps him focus on something other than the jumbled mess of feelings vying for supremacy over his insides, but it doesn't quite stop the touched little smile from reaching his face. Finally, he looks up at Dimitri.]

Thank you. I do like it.

[Felix's approval makes him feel as though the sun is inside his chest - warm and bright and sinking into his very bones.]

I used Chip's swords as practice... and have had some of the Paliens help me with holding wood, or keeping it in place. There was also someone else who worked at the inn in Violet City... She was familiar with woodworking, and allowed me to use some things of hers in return for minor chores done.

[Apparently, the innkeeper in Cherrygrove had spoken well of him to the inn there... Dimitri doesn't think he minds it, really.]

I did not have anything to compare it to, besides my own experience... so I am glad it came out well.

[From beneath the bed, there's squeaking, and Dimitri turns to help his Rattata with pulling out one more thing. This one isn't exactly wrapped, and that makes it all the more obvious: a wooden lance.]

Violence is frowned upon here... so I had to convince her that these were simply for play. [He smiles over at Felix, tentative.] We... could spare, if you would like.

[They haven't sparred together in five years... Dimitri finds that he's missed it. He's missed it, and Felix, dearly.]

Your experience is plenty. [Dimitri...apparently went to a lot of trouble to make a good sparring weapon, and Felix has to break eye contact again--at least, until the rat starts pulling the lance out from under the bed, and Felix's eyes widen.]

...yes. Spar with me.

[He meets Dimitri's gaze with a tentative smile of his own and a certain excitement in his eyes. It hasn't been nearly so long since Felix last trained with the prince, but it feels different now. Dimitri made this sword, specifically for him, for this purpose. They're not training because they have to, but because they want to. No one has ever been as good a sparring partner as Dimitri, and he's sure no one ever will be.]

[For the first time in a very long time, something about the world feels... connected. Like a puzzle piece that's finally found something to slot against. Dimitri's heart can't stop its hopeful fluttering, and Dimitri moves to the door.]

We will want to move outside then... We would not want to break anything inside the inn.

[It's already under renovations as it is, after all. No need to cause more.]

[Felix nods.] Let's go.

[It's cold outside, but that's nothing for a couple of Faerghan warriors about to work up a sweat. Felix spends a few minutes doing his usual stretches, and then another minute or so further familiarizing himself with the heft and feel of the weapon, before he turns to face Dimitri in a ready stance. He wears an anticipatory smirk.]

Ready?

[Just like Felix, Dimitri stretches as well. It's something that has always felt nice, one of the few healthy habits he's actually kept up in the five years he's been on his own. In the crisp chillness of Azalea, it feels even nicer, somehow... Maybe especially with the sweater that Sylvain got for him.]

[When Felix turns to him, Dimitri actually dares to grin back. It's a nice day for a spar, he thinks, and they even have an audience: Dean and the Rattata have followed them, with Dean holding up Dimitri's umbrella. A dark color normally, it's being blanketed with the gentle snowfall of the day.]

[It's nice. It makes him feel... at home.]

Ready. [He slides into a stance of his own, always more confident with a lance than a sword.] Shall I let you have the first blow?

[A few of Felix's Pokemon are in attendance, too--he's gotten into the habit of leaving the cats out of their balls in casual situations, and there are four now thanks to the Skitty he caught on the way here. The four of them try their best to huddle under the umbrella with the rats, although Varley tries to look like she doesn't care one way or the other about the snow.

Felix scoffs.] Don't you dare 'let' me have anything. I'll take the first blow myself.

[He launches himself forward with his customary speed, preparing to dodge the lance at mid-range and slip inside Dimitri's defenses. He knows, of course, that the prince has his own techniques to counter this, and it's all so familiar...Felix likes familiar. They've always fallen easily into the rhythm of training, even when their relationship was at its worst; now, it feels like they could almost be back in Fhirdiad for how comfortably the exchange seems.]

[That's Felix - always on the attack, a whirl of blue and steel. Even as Dimitri moves to counter, he feels reassured by the sight.]

[Polearms have an advantage over swords because of their length; that's one of the first things he was ever taught as a child when he first took up the lance. Learning the advantages and disadvantages of a weapon is about as important as learning to wield that weapon.]

[Yet the advantage a lance has over a sword only if it can hit, only if the opponent can be properly kept away. The two of them have learned that, too, and known it for a long while. It's part of why Dimitri loves sparring with Felix so much. It's the perfect exchange of Felix pushing them both to their limits, looking for any instance of a weak spot, and putting it on Dimitri's plate to spot the latest move or trick he'll use.]

[When he had been on his own... Dimitri had remembered that, ever time he had gone against an enemy swordsman.]

[It's what keeps their sparring sessions going for so long, and Dimitri is glad to use his warm up from the past weekend, against Team Rocket, so that he can give Felix a decent challenge. Still.... something feels odd. Dimitri isn't sure what it is, even as Felix's constant attacks keep him from dwelling on it too much. But has Felix become a better swordsman - well, obviously he has, in the five years they were apart, but Dimitri could swear his blows hit harder.]

[He has to adjust his own grip and attacks in turn, even as a part of him is terrified of the inevitable snap that will be his practice lance cracking in two.]

[Felix likes to test his skills against lancers whenever he can, for the challenge of overcoming his weapon's inherent disadvantage. And he likes sparring with Sylvain and Ingrid, of course, but...it just has never been quite the same as this. No one wields a lance like Dimitri does, like a human tornado powerful enough to rend steel, and Felix loves the unique thrill of it.

...but today, something is off. At first, he almost accuses Dimitri of going easy on him, but he's spent his whole life training with this man, who is terrible at hiding his intentions. He knows what it's like when the prince is deliberately holding back, and this is not it. He has a suspicion, and after one more parry, he's sure of it. He steps back and lowers his sword, eyes wide.]

Your Crest isn't working.

[Felix doesn't back down.]

[It's one of his best qualities, even if it's also one of his worst on occasion... and depending on the occasion. Sparring matches between the two of them can sometimes go on for ages, whether just one long match or a series of lightning fast consecutive ones as they push themselves as hard as they can go.]

[So for Felix to suddenly pull back... Dimitri blinks, surprised, and then stares when he actually registers Felix words. Yet even then...]

What?

Your Crest. It isn't working. All that Blaiddyd strength of yours is missing.

[He takes a second to digest that. He's...well, obviously he's never fought Dimitri without it. Up until now, that would have been impossible, no matter how careful the prince was.]

It's probably for the same reason magic doesn't work here. I haven't tried using my Crest, but I assume it wouldn't work either. ...huh.

[Felix keeps talking, explaining, theorizing, but it filters in as nothing more than white noise as Dimitri looks down at himself.]

[It had occurred to him, distantly, that nothing had broken lately. Sometimes, he had felt as though he was tiring perhaps easier than he should have, but, well... he had started to chalk that up as simply paying mind to his body again, and realizing all the work and wear he had put it through. He so often feels disconnected from his body, so he...]

[He swallows, thickly, feeling as though he's trying to ingest a rock. Tentatively, fearing this may be some sort of dream, he tightens his grip on the wooden lance he has in his hand.]

[In Faerghus, just the slightest twitch of his hands, a tightening of his fingers to not lose his grip, a too fast or two powerful swing... That would have shattered many a metal weapon. Dimitri knows that all too well.]

[But the wooden lance remains whole.]

[The world suddenly seems dizzying, vast, and Dimitri just keeps staring down at the simple wooden lance that does not break. He doesn't know when he drags his gaze up to look at Felix, only that he does it, and once he sees him, once he sees him...]

[Dimitri drops his lance to the snow, doesn't think twice about it. All he can think about is striding over to Felix, reaching out for him- ]

[He can't remember the last time he was allowed to hug someone, and not worry about killing them. He can't remember ever being allowed to hold Felix like this, tight and close to his chest, his face buried in that beautiful dark hair made wet by the falling snow.]

...Dimitri?

[The prince doesn't hear him. That hand clenches tightly around the lance's haft, and it stays whole. Not even a crack or a splinter. It's not the mind-blowing revelation it is for Dimitri, but still--Felix has known this man their whole lives, and the increasing care with which he needed to handle everything from weapons to people to dishes and silverware was a constant that followed them everywhere.

But Felix doesn't have the patience to sit around thinking about the implications. He's ready to move on, and he's about to say so when Dimitri meets his eye, and--

Then he's moving, and Felix isn't sure what the sudden pounding of his pulse foresees, but it isn't this.] What are you--

[He stiffens, part instinct that expects to be crushed by the prince's strength and part simple unfamiliarity. The only person to have touched him at all in the past five years was Sylvain, other than the occasional brief hand on a shoulder from the Professor or Ingrid. Even then, hugs were few and far between until very recently. And before that...

Before that, interact with Dimitri at all without a weapon close by felt unsafe. Before that, he felt nauseous whenever they were in the same room and he couldn't even begin to think about touching him aside from the incidental ~~violence~~ contact of training.

But before that, when they were young, Felix used to throw his arms around Dimitri and squeeze every time they saw each other, and in return the prince was ever so careful, barely touching him most of the time for fear of what might happen.

Now, Dimitri's arms are warm and strong--just enough, not too much. It feels like he's pouring a decade's worth of feelings into a single embrace, and although that scares Felix, it feels like...like coming home for the first time in forever. When was the last time he felt ready to allow this much closeness between them? To touch Dimitri without memory dragging him down into fear and helplessness?

Doesn't matter now. Felix relaxes slightly, barely daring to breathe. ...the cards are in his hands, he realizes abruptly. If he were to tell Dimitri right now to let go, not to touch him, he has no doubt that the prince would listen, and this would never happen again. But if he stays here and accepts it...

...then it could, probably would happen again. And Felix wants that, suddenly. He wants to be able to let himself adore his prince again as he did once. They've let too much time go by; they both needed that time, but it can't be a lifetime. Felix won't let it be. Slowly, he lets the wooden sword fall from his fingers and brings his arms up to wrap them around Dimitri, first hesitantly, then tightly, tightly as though letting go would be a death sentence.

Still, he's calm when he rests his cheek against the prince's broad chest and closes his eyes. When he mutters, it's fond.]

Sentimental fool.

[Felix is so warm. Dimitri thinks he can recall many memories with this simple fact in them. Felix was so warm, one of the warmest things he ever felt in Fhirdiad outside of his parents' own embrace.]

[He's warm now. Dimitri says this, even with the soft chill that's swept over Felix's hair, and his body in general. It's a warmth that's different from shallow physical warmth. It's something... that hits so much deeper than anything else in the world.]

[Suddenly, Felix is resting his face against his chest. His arms are at his back. Everything feels as though, for once in his life, it's put in the right places. If the two of them could just stay like this forever...]

[Dimitri tries to say something, tries to respond to that fond insult, but no words form on his tongue. Instead, there's just a muffled and choked sort of sob - strange. He meant to laugh, if anything. It doesn't matter, Dimitri decides in the end. All he does is heft Felix up suddenly in his arms - still easy to do without his Crest, he's elated to know - and spins him around.]

[Suddenly, everything feels so bright.]

Gah! What are you doing, you blubbering oaf--

[His hands clutch at Dimitri's clothes reflexively for a moment at the sudden lurch, before he shoves at the prince's shoulders (although, he can admit to himself, not very hard).]

All right, that's enough. Put me down. [Goddess, he hopes Sylvain or, worse, Claude isn't around to see this. He'd just disappear into the snow and hibernate until spring thaw. Or longer. Maybe forever.

But even once Dimitri does put him down, he doesn't really...go anywhere, doesn't back off, other than to adjust his clothes and push mussed, wet hair back from his face with a flustered huff.]

Next you're going to tell me you want to make snow dragons with you or something.

[Having Felix stay close.... It does something to Dimitri, makes it feel hard to breath, makes his heart pound rapidly in his chest. If they could stay like this forever...]

[Felix's words make him jerk upright, and he stares down at him.]

I - I can make snowballs now, and not destroy them!!

Dimitri

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