Josuke Higashikata Meets Pokémon (part 1)

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[Action]

Whoa whoa whoa hey, don't touch the hair - and you better explain what I'm doing here, now!

[Josuke is practically being forced out the door of "Mom"'s house not only by the mystery woman, but also by the Pansage riding his shoulders eagerly waving and pointing at everything in sight. He's sure never met her before, and it's really freaking him out. He thought his real mom could get crazy.

The door gets slammed on him before he realizes he's outside.]

Oh, now this is just great.

[He's gonna be strolling around looking for answers. You look out of place, maybe you know something?]

[Video...?]

[That... is the side of a face. Someone seems to have not noticed the lens... or maybe not.]

Apparently this thing I got is a phone, not just a camera? Fancy stuff. Guess the first question is, who am I even calling? Wouldn't think it'd make one with no number.

[He'd been poking around, and found some things that looked phone-like, so he gave it a try. It is acting odd, but maybe it's like a Stand or something. There could totally be a phone stand.]

Wouldn't be right to just say that, though. Name's Josuke Higashikata. A little confused by all this, but I guess I've got time to work it out since it doesn't look like I'm going anywhere anytime soon.

Got a song stuck in my head something fierce, though.

[He finally moves the Gear away from the side of his head, giving everyone a really clear look at his pompadour and face, finally. He's managed to get Yes to calm down, at least, but he also forgot to hang up.]

Wait, maybe...

[He's taking off his jacket on camera. It's midsummer so sure, that makes some sense, but the way he's looking over it might seem more like there might be a problem with it than just looking at it strangely.]

Comments

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Josuke.

[This might be the wrong house.]

Didn't see anyone other than the crazy woman in there just now, and I'll bet she doesn't want to see either of us.

[dashdash]

Huh? [Mafuyu stops her pounding and shouting to look over at Josuke again.]

No way, Mom's super nice! [Her own mom kicked her out of the house and told her not to come home and make trouble, so this mom isn't much different.]

Homemade bento! You got one too, right?

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[He never did check what was in that bag he got, huh.]

Don't know yet.

[Soap, toothpaste... basic haircare wait]

Certainly has no taste in conditioner, I'm gonna need better than this.

[dashdash]

[Disregarding his personal space, Mafuyu walks up beside him and looks into the bag as well. Toiletries. She moved those aside the moment she discovered food, so she didn't get a good look at what else there was, helpful manuals or otherwise.]

What's conditioner.....

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You run it through your hair when you wash it and it changes the texture. Don't think I've ever heard of this brand, though...

[Anyway, moving on, there's... oh, that actually does look like a box lunch.]

Oh, hey, there is one.

[He's not expecting the best food in the world out of it but anyone would have trouble competing with a guy he's met.]

[dashdash]

[Why would you want to change the texture? In contrast to Josuke's fabulous pompadour, Mafuyu doesn't really look like she takes care of her hair, cut short and uneven, an ashen grey after it's been dyed over previously blond hair. Rather than hair, she's more interested in the contents of his lunch box...]

What's in it? [practically hanging off his arms trying to see what's inside] Let me have some.

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[Josuke is reminded of a very particular restaurant trip. He's got options... either give in, or do exactly what Okuyasu did then.

Like hell he'll share this, though.]

You got one too, didn't you? It's probably got the same stuff yours did!

[dashdash]

[Urk. She did, but that was ages ago!]

Just one bite! A little bite! Share with me! Don't be stingy!

[She has zero leverage except persistence. But man, is she persistent.]

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Well why didn't you save any?

[Josuke you have problems with money and gambling you're one to talk.]

[dashdash]

That's...! [No... She has no good reason. This is somebody who has 200 yen to last through two days and goes ahead and buys hot chocolate. There's no way she thinks ahead as far as to save her meals when she doesn't know when the next one is coming.] I was hungry so I ate it all. It was so good.

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[He thought so.]

Just wanted you to be honest with yourself first. But just a bit, you hear? You're not gettin' away with more than that.

[He picks out something pretty small but not insignificant for her, then starts eating some himself.]

It's not bad, really, but not the best thing I've ever had.

[Looking it over, most of this seems like it'd spoil pretty quick. He guesses Mafuyu probably ate all her trail mix, too.]

[dashdash]

[Mafuyu claps her hands together in thanks before accepting the food. Rolled egg omelette, handmade with the love of one's mother, how could it not be the most delicious thing she's ever eaten? It's gone in two bites, just like every other edible thing in her backpack, but she looks satisfied with the meal.]

Delicious! Super delicious! Just like Ayaben's bento!

[Her school lunches may or may not consist of other people's food... But at least she helps pay for the ingredients instead of freeloading like she is now.]

Are you a rich kid? Do you get to eat a lot of good food every day?

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I wouldn't really say that...

[Thinking about it, though, he did live in a two-income household until fairly recently, to say nothing of... a more recent windfall that he hasn't gotten to use thanks to his mom meddling "for his own good".]

[dashdash]

[He's not denying it, but if he's not rich, he must be super rich. A millionaire, he has to be, in order to fill his hair with conditioner. But out here, surrounded by empty houses and an open sky, it's a level playing field. She winds up her leg, and kicks a rock on the road as far as it'll go, watching it sail idly through the air.] How're we going to get food later? No one's opening their doors. [The rock flies a good several meters before its trajectory is interrupted by the trunk of a tree.] ...Oh. Tree fruit isn't poisonous, right? Just stuff on the ground?

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[Depends on the currency. Yen? ...Actually yes, although a considerable amount of it is still frozen. Dollars... maybe not, but still a considerable possibility because of the old man's real estate dealings. However, that is a pretty good question, since neither of them are likely to have much income going forward for the immediate future...]

How should I know? Do I look like the kind of person that'd know that?

[dashdash]

Well... You look strong, so, [she points to the tree] maybe you can try eating one and then tell me?

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Pretty sure that's the wrong kinda strength...

[Honestly, the thing on that tree looks... too blue. Not like the blueberry kind of blue, more like the kinda blue on... say, the N64's "A" button, or something, the kind of blue that is probably not healthy for something naturally growing to be colored.]

[dashdash]

[Vibrant colors generally mean more nutrients, doesn't it? Like dark leafy greens, or... X11 blue fruit. In either case, fruit is healthy and there's no harm (to her) in trying, so she makes her way up to the tree, trying to spot the lowest hanging fruit.] The human body's tough and there's nothing else to eat so we gotta try! I'll even... [She wipes at the air, missing the fruit by inches even after jumping. Too short!! She turns to Josuke.] Oy, that one there. Grab it.

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[Done.]

Here, all yours.

[He's not taking this chance just yet.]

[dashdash]

[Must be nice to be tall. She considers for a second letting her starter try it out since Josuke's so unwilling to take one for the team, but that isn't the example she wants to set for her Pokemon. So she takes the bright blue berry in hand, wipes a spot clean on the front of her shirt, and takes a large bite. ... ......!! WHAT IS THAT TASTE. She can't swallow it, she can't even turn around and throw up to get the taste out of her mouth, she just stands there in utter shock of how utterly disgusting a piece of fruit can be. Fruit is supposed to be sweet and delicious. Why god. Why would you betray her like this.]

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[It's not often that food sends someone into near-shock. Josuke has seen "this food is way too good" shock. This is definitely not that.]

WHAT'S WRONG WITH THIS TOWN?