video;

[sassymaru]

[The video opens to a young man with very, very green eyes. He bows slightly, with a little flourish to one hand.]

Greetings to all! It would seem I've awoken to a predicament. You see... someone has seen fit to hand me a small, slimy creature.

Something hardly befitting of a mysterious ninja such as myself.

[He says this as he's standing in plain sight, arms folded, and ... well. Wearing bright purple. Because that's subtle. He gestures to the adorable Froakie sitting at his feet.]

Who is it fielding complaints in this location? I would have a serious conversation with them, if possible.

Ah, though I suppose, it would also be wise to see if there is anyone who recognizes my name among those watching this feed. I am Brave Police Independent Stealth Unit, Shadowmaru~!

[... yeah there's a flourish at the end of that last word there.]

Comments

Video

[foolishwren]

_{[... That flourish. God.]}

So... is the bright purple getup like, part of your stealth suit or what?

Video

[sassymaru]

[Lucky you, Heather, you get another flourish.]

It worked surprisingly well in my world.

Of course, none of us had the luxury of choosing the colors of our plating.

Video

[foolishwren]

_{[She is already wondering how many times she can get him to do that in a single conversation.]}

Was your world a Lisa Frank stickerbook?

Video

[sassymaru]

[A lot, but the Lisa Frank comment sort of throws him off his groove.]

A... what? Who is this Miss Frank?

Video

[foolishwren]

_{[Already laughing at her own joke, she waves it off with one hand.]}

Nothing, nothing. Bad joke.

Anyway, your best bet is to complain to the sky, because there's not really anything you can do about being here.

Video

[sassymaru]

So I see. You're the local comedian, I take it?

[But hey, at least he doesn't sound upset by this line of commentary.]

Are the parties responsible the ones also keeping my body hostage?

[What.]

Video

[foolishwren]

Yep, I'm here every Thursday. If you have waitresses, tip 'em.

<sub>[But then her face blanks.]

[She's met plenty of people who had different bodies before coming here.]

[He is the first one to... phrase it like that.]</sub>

What?

Video

[sassymaru]

My apologies for lacking funds with which to tip.

[He just tilts his head.]

My real body. Someone must have installed my AI chip into this one, while hiding the real one.

I must appear very human to you.

Video

[foolishwren]

Well, yeah, that's what this place does. Turns you human.

That is your real body, for as long as you're here.

_{[She's known a number of former robots and THIS IS THE FIRST ONE who literally thought someone took his brain, put it in a human, and then hid his actual body somewhere.]}

Video

[sassymaru]

... You're certain of this?

[Sorry, Heather, this is the guy whose brain can be taken out of his head and put in another body, sooo...]

Who told you it was possible?

Video

[foolishwren]

No one had to tell me.

I live with a bunch of people who used to basically be magic science zombies.

One of my old friends used to be a pony.

Like, that's just how things work here.

Video

[sassymaru]

But how can you be certain?

[Look, this is ... important.]

Video

[foolishwren]

Because I live here.

What, you think you're the first robot to be a human in this place?

Video

[sassymaru]

...



Yes?

Video

[foolishwren]

No?

No, you're not.

Like, sorry to harsh your groove or whatever, but I've met a bunch of robots here.

Video

[sassymaru]

What were their names?

Do you recall any of them?

Video

[foolishwren]

Ironhide, Cliffjumper... there was a guy named Mettaton I think...

Video

[sassymaru]

... Ah. I see.

[No one he's ever heard of, then. So much for that.]

Thank you for the information, regardless, miss.