001 | video

[adandyinspace]

[Out of all the horrible things that have happened so far this week, the worst is yet to come. It's some guy and he looks into the feed like everyone just played some sort of huge prank on him. It certainly feels that way, being told he's gotta trek three days in the snow certainly sounds like a joke.

Thankfully it looks like he's hastily slapped on some kind of winter outfit, his giant hair sticking out from under the hat that barely wants to stay on. From what can be seen of his jacket, it appears to stick out unnaturally and even wiggle about, probably the pokémon he was given. Anything to stay warm.]

Hey, sooo, I know you're all havin' a really fun time right now, but I'm freezing my ass off and my communicator ain't working. So I'm using this one. Anyway, quick question, what kinda planet invents the video phone and not something like, I dunno...a bus?

[Dandy feels like this is an incredibly valid question.]

If you find one good lookin' corpse, don't touch my wallet, I swear to-- [But before he can continue, the wiggling intensifies and Dandy's face suddenly breaks out in all smiles, an extreme contrast to the face he was just making. He laughs like an idiot and falls to his knees, the video shaking and losing focus in the process.] NO! S-STOP!! That...that tickles...!!

[And it cuts...]

Comments

Video

[ghoststanning]

[Hey Dandy, here's this asshole!]

I don't think most normal forms of transportation exists here! I'm pretty sure this dimension is really concerned about the environment and cut out most things in our modern world that would cause harm to it!

[...]

But you should try finding some place warm, or see if your Pokemon can help start a fire. I arrived here during the winter myself and it's not fun to talk three days in this weather.

[adandyinspace]

[Woah, hey, he's king asshole around here, thank you very much.]

Uuuuhhhhhh...

[Are people supposed to look like cartoon characters around here? It's gotta be someone dressing up, or he's just so cold his brain wants to give him one nice hallucination before he kicks the bucket. He's not acting like the right Buster, anyway...

Ugh, he doesn't have TIME to stand around and be all starstruck, he's got a weird dog to cash in on.]

'Kay.


...What's a pokémon?

[ghoststanning]

[This "Venkman" perks up instantly at the question.]

Oh! They're these little creatures that you can befriend! Every different species of them have various powers and most of them are apparently pretty benevolent, but they also enjoy competitive fighting to the point that it's the national sport here! You should have been given when you arrived here.

They're really neat. I've been doing a lot of research on them since I arrived here, especially the Ghost Pokemon.

[adandyinspace]

[He was really hoping a pokemon was some sort of lighter. Or a blow torch.]

I got a weird alien dog and if you think I'm gonna let anything lay a single finger on her, you got another thing comin'.

[THE VERY NERVE!]

And if we don't find some place to crash soon, she's gonna become a ghost along with me.

[ghoststanning]

I can't blame you. While I've been curious about competitive battling and being thinking about trying out some gyms, I worry about hurting my children.

[... He's talking about his Pokemon.]

Actually about that! As it turns out you can't die in this dimension! If you're close to death, you will just wake up back at at Pokemon Center fully healed.

Of course I've only had other people say this to me, so I don't know if their words hold any water, but I guess you won't have to worry about dying from hypothermia! Just the effects of it.

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[neverstudied]

[Here comes the other asshole! Or at least, the other animated and bodyswapped one.]

Believe me, I've been asking myself that since I got here. My suggestion? Pick up a monster that you can ride. I lucked out by finding a two-headed ostrich pretty early on. They're dicks, but they can run a lot faster'n I can.

[adandyinspace]

[This is a prank, this has to be a prank, Ray would never say that about a two-headed ostrich.

Also he's a cartoon.]

Yeah, I'm not really in the position to wrestle ostriches right now, thanks.

[Not when he's juggling a baby in his jacket.]

So, like, did I miss something...? You're like the second dude who looks like they came right outta the Ghostbusters... And, uh, no offense, but you both got the personalities waaaaaaay wrong. I don't think you're even trying to emulate the pure joy Ray Stantz would have over a two-headed ostrich.

[At the very least, all this nerding out is distracting him from his imminent death.]

[neverstudied]

Then you can walk. [Shrugs.] Good luck trying not to die out there. Especially if you don't have fire.

... Wait, wait, wait, you recognize us? Oh my God. You know us! That makes you the second person in the last couple days to-

... Oh. Yeah, about that. Ray and I got body-swapped. This is Dr. Peter Venkman in the body of Ray Stanz. You were probably talking to Ray in my body.

It's been... Interesting.

[He's gotten headbutted by pumpkins and slapped by balloons and had a psychic baby scream "fuck" in his mind every few minutes.]

[adandyinspace]

[Dandy gasps, sticking his entire face into the feed and completely forgetting about his death.]

Dude. Like that time Egon switched bodies with Slimer? [HOLY SHIT. Also...Dandy's apparently game to just accept that these are the actual characters because why not? Awesome, cartoons are real and completely indifferent towards his possible demise. It's not like he hasn't dealt with weirder.] Aw man, you gotta switch back pronto or else you two are gonna start thinking you're each other.

[That's what happened in the episode, anyway.]

[neverstudied]

Oh God, I almost forgot about that. Wait, how do you know about that?

[Venkman knows about other dimensions knowing the movie, but not that other dimensions have a cartoon based on him. You're about to either make his goddamn day or give him an existential crisis, Dandy.]

I think we're alright so far. Ray hasn't turned into a charming pessimist, and I'm not happy-go-lucky about end of the world scenarios. This world's body-swapping rules might be different from ours.

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[a_sin_for_him]

The lack of traditional transportation is one of the little quirks of this world. It's very odd, and not ideal, but there are some options. Bicycles are popular, if not helpful in winter. And Pokemon which can be ridden.

Winter's a particularly unpleasant time to arrive here, and I'm afraid you've come in the middle of an...upset. I'm sorry. But if you do succumb to the elements, you'll wake up in the nearest Pokecenter, healthy and warm and taken care of.

[adandyinspace]

[Cool. Good to know once he dies, he can buy a bicycle in the poke-after life. This is exactly what he tries to type out, but considering the circumstances, it doesn't exactly work out.]

CXFDIOL

[Yeah, he gives up on that pretty fast, switching back to video.]

FYI, I can't type with gloves on.

Look, I ain't the only one out here. I got this dog and I don't want it bitin' the big one, either.

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[a_sin_for_him]

You don't have to. I normally use the visual function but I'm afraid it's...a bad day for that.

That's your starter companion, we all begin with one. But you don't need to worry, you can't perish here. You'll both be fine, just cold. And there's a very nice little spa in the next town to treat yourself at once you've made it.

Have you any experience or familiarity with hiking and camping?

[adandyinspace]

'Course I do, travel all the time. [He says this as if it should be common knowledge...] Except I usually have like a tent or somethin'. A sleeping bag just ain't gonna cut it. I am SO gonna hit up this spa...

But what do you mean "we all begin with one?" Everyone's just handed a dog when they wind up here?

[Which, you know, cool, but...]

...Are you tellin' me this thing isn't rare?

[a_sin_for_him]

Some experience is better than none.

We all start with a Pokemon of some type. I started with a Spheal, a sort of marine mammal creature. There's hundreds of different types.

Rarity should hardly matter. That will be your closest companion and champion in this world. You'll meet wild ones and other trainers as you travel, and they'll challenge one another to battle. It's perfectly natural and normal in this world. And a simple way to make money, you earn a small purse whenever you beat another trainer.

[Video]

[cyan_maid]

...I mean, you have a valid point, but complaining isn't going to make a bus appear. Or keep you warm. Though I suppose your new friend is helping on the second one, if that wiggling is any indicator?

[Jane's put her 'gear like, on the other side of her kitchen table to respond. Zappy things are going on and she is NOT about it, so all precautions have to be taken.]

[adandyinspace]

Hey, if no one complains, then no one's ever gonna build a bus. It's called supply and demand.

[And as everyone knows, complaining is just a fancier form of demanding. Or so he believes. Thankfully it doesn't look like he's going to keep complaining because he suddenly looks away from the feed, scratching his cheek a little.]

Uh, kinda... It's more like I'm keepin' her warm. I'm starting to think she hates the cold more than I do.

[cyan_maid]

Believe me, sir, I am well acquainted with basic economics. But I don't think the roads around where you are can really support a long term run of buses without making bus repair needs skyrocket as well.

[She hums a little bit at that.] I see...so I'm guessing your Pokemon's sort of like a reptile, then?

[adandyinspace]

[Stupid...basic economics...keeping him from...surviving. But no, it's cool, it's fine. Dandy actually perks up when he gets to talk about his new little pal.]

Nah, she's more like a little doggie. Check it, she's fluffy.

[And if on cue, a little deino head perks out from under his jacket, looking only like a dog if someone squints hard enough. Dandy ruffles her fuzzy head lovingly.]

Jackasses couldn't think to pack her a tiny sweater, so it looks like we're kangaroo'ing it.

[cyan_maid]

[...Yeah that looks like a fluffy dragon.]

Well, it's nice to see you're already looking out for her from the get-go. She likely appreciates it a great deal.

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[pkemeter]

[And, last but not least, here's the third Ghostbuster. Egon adjusts his glasses, staring at the video feed. It looks like he's working on something that...vaguely looks like a colander with a bunch of nodes attached to it. A Phantump is tinkering with a ratchet, though she doesn't look like she's actually trying to help him build the device.]

You could always take the ferry to Kanto, which leaves from New Bark Town. They have complimentary food and relaxation areas. The trip takes three days total. However, it will also likely deplete you of all of your funds.

[He rubs his chin with his thumb.]

The society in this dimension seems rather inclined to be ecologically friendly and encourages its residents to act as such. This may be a result of human beings growing so closely dependent on the native creatures.

[adandyinspace]

[Considering what's been going on so far, it's weird that this isn't, like, Winston switched with Egon or something. It's also weird that he doesn't look like the cartoon versions like the rest of them do...

All this nonsense isn't making any sense, dammit.

But fine, whatever, it's cool. He's still too concerned with his possible death and his eyes seem to increase in size the more Egon talks up this ferry. Aaaaall the way up to "deplete you of all your funds," then his expression simply deflates.]

Cold agonizing death it is.

[Look, he need his titty bar money.]

That's a shit excuse and you know it. I've been to all sorts of natural down-to-earth whatevers and all of 'em managed transportation. At least set up a place for people to chill until the weather warms up, yeesh...

[pkemeter]

[Egon raises an eyebrow.]

There's always the option to nearly freeze to death and allow the local PokéCenter to rescue you. As far as I am aware, there is no way to actually "die" in this world from unnatural causes.

[He says that with a disconcertingly casual tone as he crosses his arms.]

Technically, you did not have to start walking along the trail. You could have stayed in New Bark Town and waited for someone to bring you to another city, yes? The entity named "Mom" has a tendency to take care of new arrivals as if they were its own offspring.

[adandyinspace]

Hold up, seriously?! All she did was kick me out on my ass and refuse to open up no matter how many times I pounded on that door. That's not fair, I'm demanding a do-over!

[Alas, if only life had do-overs.]

And who am I supposed to wait for if I can't get someone to get me to a city now?!

[pkemeter]

Did she? Perhaps only after some amount of time has passed will she allow arrivals to re-enter her home.

[He frowns lightly, scratching his chin with his hand.]

You could always offer people money for exchange for services to "encourage" them to come to you. If that doesn't work, you'll have to make the trek to the next town. There's no alternative, unfortunately.