TEXT - backdated to the evening of 6/30 (cw: sibling death)

[fingersandteeth]

You would think that knowing for sure would make things better but it doesn't really.

It doesn't matter that she's got some good wraith friends or that Old Man Tsukiyomi's original is summoning her shade on the regular or that she doesn't blame me or that she knows now that goddamn piece of shit Fetch wasn't me.

She should be twenty-six twenty-seven something like that goddamn fairy time bullshit the point is that she's never going to be that old she's always going to be twenty-five right now twenty-five and dead.

You would have thought it would be good to see her over the weekend and it was but she's gone now and it's her birthday and everything hurts.

No matter how much I smoke Lydia it still hurts.

Fuck.

[Turns out you don't need an ion storm for what you thought were private messages getting sent to the network if you're intoxicated enough.]

Comments

text;

[amaure]

[How embarrassing, and while he might otherwise enjoy the suffering of such an enemy...he cannot help but feel the smallest bit of pity for him. Empathy. He's still mad at him, especially with what he did to him over the weekend, but...well, his comeuppance will come either way, but this...]

You would do well to double check that your missives are being received by whom you intend them for. Such times of emotional vulnerability are the worst to make such mistakes.

My condolences, by the way. It is never easy losing the ones we love.

Re: text;

[fingersandteeth]

Solus what the hell.

Oh no no no no this is the worst argh.

This was for Lydia not you please go away.

text;

[amaure]

Mayhap you should indulge in your intoxicants in the company of those whom you wish to speak with in such a time. Though I understand the allure of grieving in solitude.

With that being said, I will take my leave. But, our differences and disagreements aside, I meant what I said: you have my condolences--she was a fine young lady, a pity she was taken so young.

[Honestly, she wasn't much older than his son when he died to that terrible disease.]

Re: text;

[fingersandteeth]

Maybe but it felt so stupid to be like this when I just saw her that I slunk off to do it alone.

She was a far better person than I will ever be.

text

[stopinthenameofawe]

[....well there are some interesting words in there.

There is a part of Melissa that does also care, a little bit, emotions are still a bit rough to get back used to, since Steven's one of the few people here she's spoken to at any length. But she won't say there isn't another motive, either.]

I don't think you meant to make this as public as you did.



But it also sounds like you could use a drink, and I owe you from when I first got here.

Re: text

[fingersandteeth]

No I didn't this was very much a mistake argh.

I would like that drink but I'm not sure if I should leave the house considering I'm not in a state where I can properly post evidently.

Maybe tomorrow????

Re: text

[stopinthenameofawe]

Either tomorrow or I could just bring over a bottle of something. Your choice.

Text;

[schachmeister]

Steven, would you like to talk?

It's Armin, by the way. I think you posted to the network by mistake. I understand if you want to delete this entry, but you can talk to me.

Re: Text;

[fingersandteeth]

Yeah it was just supposed to go to Lydia she understands these things.

But I guess I could talk to you because oh boy is today the worst day in the world and I wasn't even ready yet it was September when I woke up here I didn't think I would have to see today for months.

Text;

[schachmeister]

[Steven, it has been months, but Armin won't point that out. He understands the sentiment.]

Do you want to actually talk or keeping texting? Both are okay with me. I don't think I can say anything to make it better, but I can listen to whatever is on your mind right now.

[He'd prefer actual talking though, as that way he can take more cues as to Steven's emotional state from his voice, maybe his expression even. But he won't push Steven into that.]

LOCKED AS FUCK

[uber_marionettist]

What the hell is your damage?

FOREVER LOCKED

[fingersandteeth]

Look I'm sorry I screwed up and sent this to everyone and that I'm a goddamn mess and not anything your toxic masculine self would want to associate with but I really don't need this right now Dirk.

[uber_marionettist]

What? What the fuck are you talking about?

Holy shit. I cannot fucking believe this.

I don't give a shit about that. Or I didn't, now we might have to have words about it later.

His dreams, asshole. You were fucking with his dreams? Remember saying that? You told the entire network about it, just now?

[angewiesen]

So you saw someone that's dead in your world here?

Kinda glad I've been warned that can happen, to be honest.

[fingersandteeth]

I was warned and yet I was unprepared as unprepared as that guy Mark who reads things on the internet god Charley always loved his blindwatches and blindreads.

[angewiesen]

Uh, I think you're gonna want to reel your sentence there back a bit. I lost you in the second half.

[Text]

[wonderland_vogue]

[Oh fuck her life.]

This is why you text me before getting into these kinds of things, darling.

Or you just come over to my place and completely negate the need for having to message me and send it to everyone else instead. The offer is still open in a private capacity if you need it.

Re: [Text]

[fingersandteeth]

I don't think I'm in a good place to travel now Lydia honestly but maybe tomorrow I need to call in anyway I am pretty sure I am going to not be fit to work anyway.

Plus my work laptop keeps acting up and keeps going from like 60% battery to zero in less than a minute.

Re: [Text]

[wonderland_vogue]

I could have just sent Allure along, she'd be able to keep you steady enough.

??? Do you have some sort of electric Pokemon or something that might be messing with it?

text

[stardiving]

[Oh look, you're both emotionally and chemically compromised, it's a fucking party up in here. Of course, Estinien is just drinking...a lot...but...]

tis...difficult. losing a younger sibling.

i know not when my brother's nameday is, precisely. we did not keep track of such things. twas in the late summer, that i do recall.

i am sorry.

Re: text

[fingersandteeth]

Oh god Estinien I didn't know you too fuck I'm so sorry.

text

[stardiving]

[His response is delayed, the little blips showing that he's typing and deleting as he tries to organize his scattered and alcohol-pickled thoughts in a way that makes sense. And he doesn't want to make it sound like he thinks it's worse. For one, for him it's an old ache.]

my mother and father as well. the village i lived in.

i mean not that the loss was greater. only that i understand.

[asmywitness]

Stop trying to text people when you're high, Steven. You made it public.

[He's fairly certain he's said something to this effect before. He does sympathise with the why, in this case, but also really, Steven, don't hurt yourself like this.]

[fingersandteeth]

I realize that now Tyler but fine you're probably right ugh.

Private for Steven's sake

[asmywitness]

Don't take it as me saying you're not allowed to be upset. You are, and I get it. It sucks when reminders that someone you love isn't there get thrown back in your face. I came out of the Hedge a few days before my boyfriend's birthday.

And I'm not saying you can't talk to people. Just. Set it up when you're sober, if you can. You know?