[video]

[harlequinhater]

[The video starts off with John just trying to make sure his pokegear camera is working, showing a blurry view of a Cianwood beach, which is still scattered with various bits of debris from a storm. Soon enough the camera is turned onto John, however, whose skin looks several shades darker than it did when he was back at the moon prom. Somebody's been doing some work out in the sun.]

Hey, guys! John here. I've been stuck on this island for a while, and I've been trying to help clean things up from the storm. Things are kind of rough here. But that's not the point. What is the point is... this!

[The camera wheels back around to show a Nidorino. John is standing a safe distance away, which is probably a good thing, since the Pokemon has the barbs on its back bristled, like its ready to strike.]

Snik was always kind of temperamental as a baby, but now he's big and I am kind of worried about getting too close to him now that those poison spines are even bigger. Does anybody have advice on what to do?

[The camera's back on his face again.]

Also, if any of you are near Cian Wood, hit me up! The people here need help, and there's only so much I can do on my own.

7 ∅ [Video/Action for Route 39]

[callbacks]

[The broadcast begins, but there's an unintended second or two of jostling before Dave gets the camera set up the way he wants. The cause: He's outside, for once, leaning against a tree to get out of the noontime sun. He looks...actually pretty content, if slightly sunburned. It's fading, at least. The straw cowboy hat he's resting on his chest must be doing some good.]

Howdy, y'all--[He breaks character immediately for a snicker.] Christ, okay, never let me say anything like that again. Anyway. For those of you unused to human custom, we got a time-honored tradition of embarrassing people publicly on the day they emerged gross and wailing into existence.

[He shifts so he can dig a folded piece of paper out from his pocket and opens it. A Ponyta nearby wanders over to check out what he's doing, then blows into his hair and walks off again to watch over the Miltank they're rounding up. The corner of Dave's mouth turns up.]

This one goes out to a special dude on his special day. He knows who he is. P.S., it's Karkat.

[One breath in, and then:]

Okay,
D.J. Strider here.

[Oh god he's gonna rap.]

( Make it stop. )

[...Okay maybe he's done. For now. Dave puts the hat and crown aside and starts braiding little wildflowers together.]

We'll be accepting donations of birthday cake and child-friendly toys at the MooMoo Farm, care of Dave Strider.