[Video| New Bark Town]

[usedstockpile]

So. I. Talked with the professor in this town. The Johto one. He took a look at His Uselessness.

[Gil's seated at a table in a lab, and behind him in an aquarium is the enormous shiny Magikarp in question.]

Turns out, he has a bit of pica. Meaning he likes to eat rocks. Specific rocks. Everstones, to be precise. A lot of Everstones. Before I caught him he'd eaten so many that they make up a significant percentage of his scales' mineral composition.

[That would explain the weird 'jewels' studding the River King's dorsal fins.]

The only way he'll ever evolve is if he doesn't eat any more everstones and someone manages to remove the ones in his gut, but good luck with that. He'll get new scales in......

A decade.
[Gil's eyes are glazed, and the despair is rather evident. He turns that frown upside down though, and tries to put on that golden cheery smile]

So, anyone want a shiny Magikarp? ♥