ʟᴀɴᴄᴇ ᴍᴄᴄʟᴀɪɴ (
spacebaloney) wrote in
victory_road2018-07-01 11:46 am
» uno
[While most people are still asleep, Lance is on the grind. Like, literally. He's standing in the bathroom of the Attack on Voltron house, clad in the Starmiebucks' uniform with the nice circular logo of a Starmie in the center of the apron, flashing a dazzlingly white smile at the camera even if it's just after dawn and most people are still asleep and the poor souls who are awake aren't even thinking about popping fingerguns at the network like he's actually doing right now, oh my god. His hair is laid and his face is moisturized to perfection, sunscreen and high quality lip balm and all. Someone's gotta make the Latias Lattes and it's gonna be him. Lance might as well look good while doing so.]
Hello, world! I'm Lance and this is my announcement that today, the best leg of Voltron, the right blue one, is gainfully employed at your local Starmiebucks. [He cups his ear, feigning deafness because he's also dramatic as well as being a moron.] Wait? What's that? What's Voltron? Oh, just a gigantic robot that's currently saving the entire universe back at home, one Galra at a time.
[Christ, who was idiot who hired this braggart fool? Fire them and him.]
Anyway, this week, we're running a half-priced special on your favorite Pokéccino and with every one purchased by a pretty face, you get a chance to win a date with me, Lance the Blue Pala-
[Enjoy that sudden high pitched shrill scream that can probably be heard for miles as the 'gear clatters to the floor and the sound of Lance scrambling along the floor is heard following it. All the camera catches is one blue tentacle slowly retreating back behind the shower curtain, leaving droplets of water in its wake.]
Hello, world! I'm Lance and this is my announcement that today, the best leg of Voltron, the right blue one, is gainfully employed at your local Starmiebucks. [He cups his ear, feigning deafness because he's also dramatic as well as being a moron.] Wait? What's that? What's Voltron? Oh, just a gigantic robot that's currently saving the entire universe back at home, one Galra at a time.
[Christ, who was idiot who hired this braggart fool? Fire them and him.]
Anyway, this week, we're running a half-priced special on your favorite Pokéccino and with every one purchased by a pretty face, you get a chance to win a date with me, Lance the Blue Pala-
[Enjoy that sudden high pitched shrill scream that can probably be heard for miles as the 'gear clatters to the floor and the sound of Lance scrambling along the floor is heard following it. All the camera catches is one blue tentacle slowly retreating back behind the shower curtain, leaving droplets of water in its wake.]

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[Korra's doing her best not to snicker. He's already been - literally - knocked down a peg.]
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[Yes, it is, Lance, and everybody but you knows it.]
Something grabbed me!
[By the voice, he can tell it's a girl. If he was in the right mindset at the moment (or wrong mindset depending on who you asked), he'd be hoping she isn't cute because being groped by an unknown Pokemon in the dark is bad enough.]
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guess no one warned you about him huh
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Once Lance manages to toe the Pokegear closer to him--he ain't brave enough to peek in the tub just yet--he groans seeing it's Keith. G R E A T.]
TELL ME ABOUT WHO???
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Lance, are you okay? What was that?!
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[And very very scary. But hey, he recognizes that voice! Can't forget how she let him down nicely either.]
Yuuko?
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action; im sorry
[So.]
[Needless to say? One (1) previously sleeping man (
sorry Matt) goes bolting out of bed. And just straight into the bathroom. Possibly knocking the door half off its hinges in the process. Starmie-pattern boxers, not hair all over the place, and not much else.]Lance! What's wrong! What happened!
Re: action; i reject your apology. there is nothing to be sorry for.
Lance is startled all over again by Shiro's arrival, too startled to realize the man is practically naked, but manages to jams a finger in the direction of the shower curtain.]
Something's in the tub! And it grabbed me!
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I have no idea what pokemon that is, but it's now my favourite.
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You can have him. He's free to a good home.
[Don't listen to him. He can't be going around giving away other people's Pokemon just because his ego is bruised].
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A-are you all right?
[He'll deal with the fact that apparently another one of Shiro's team has joined them later. First gotta make sure this guy didn't manage to crack his head open on the toilet seat or anything.]
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[He really is. Coran is tucked back into the tub and Lance is combing his hair back into place. Everything is back to normal or whatever counts as normal in this crazy ass house.
Or so he wants this pretty face on his screen to know. Two girls already laughed at him. Lance needs no trifecta.]
Now what I want to know is if you're okay?
[And if not, do you need help? He's heard a date with Voltron's Finest Leg cures every ill.]
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Did Sugar forget to tell you about the bathtub Shell Squid?
[...With that said, though, he definitely sounds like a man who's just been laughing.]
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Sugar?
[Lance looks confused as hell for a bit and then realizes this guy means Shiro. Wow. How did we go from Shiro to Sugar?]
Did you just call Shiro Sugar?
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*though it sure is hilarious in this case*
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[Grumble grumble. Don't worry about Lance. His ego is just bruised to hell and back. He'll be salty all day.]
It's early, okay. I didn't have many lighting choices.
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[She wrinkles her nose.]
My sister works for Starmiebucks, too, and I'm pretty sure you can't use your job as a dating service.
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[Totally scientific explanation there about mecha, by the way. ]
There's nothing in the employee handbook about that.
[Not that Lance actually read the thing. He just pretty much skirts around rules most days in his life.]
Who's your sister?
[No, Anna, don't do it. SAVE ELSA.]
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For a long while actually.
To the point that when he woke up, groggy and sore and confused, he couldn't even remember where he was. Or what he had been doing. Thankfully, Shay is quick to welcome him back to some level of awareness and the synapses his brain begin to fire and make the connections he was having trouble making.
Right.
He's in that weird world with all the Pokemon critters in it.
And judging by his surroundings, he's in a Pokecenter. When one of the nurses inform him of his long, long rest, he flails into panic mode. His first instinct is to call Shiro. Because Shiro should know what to do. Except when he opens his gear to call the older Paladin, he's instead suddenly greeted by a most familiar face, and as equally familiar scream...]
LANCE?!?
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Lance is in the middle of trying to get himself off the bathroom floor when he hears someone calling his name. And that voice is familiar too, so Lance expects Hunk to come banging on the door in a second or two. A shame it would be for Hunk to come home from a long trip to shenanigans after going to find himself out in the Pokemon world, or at least that's similar to what Lance was told when he asked where Hunk was. But this is Team Voltron and shenanigans are their bread and butter.
Alas, when Lance gets to his feet and opens the door, the hallway is empty. Still dim with the lack of true morning lit, not even a Pokemon in sight. No Hunk. Could he have moved that fast? Not a question anybody's going to answer, but Lance is definitely sure he heard Hunk's voice.]
Hunk? Hunk, where'd ya go?
[Now if this dummy would just rethink his strategy and go look at his 'gear...]
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Voltron? Where have I heard that before... Woah, you okay? I think there's a Tentacool in your shower!
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[No, he isn't. His butt hurts, his hair is messed up, and his ego has a large crack in it, but hey green haired guy, how are you?] And maybe you know some of my friends if you've heard of Voltron! Shiro? Hunk? Matt?
[But not Keith. Keith is no friend right now.]
Nah, it's something called an Omanyte. To be honest, it looks like a snail mixed with an octopus. Still creepy as hell.
[Hey, Coran heard that! Enjoy those offended sounding blurbles, Lance.]
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Well, that's one way to advertise. Sudden danger. Manly screams. Sure to be a hit with the ladies.
[Well, he's mostly just ribbing. But hey, he remembers the days when he had a massive ego, too.
Boy, those days were weird in hindsight. But he's in his twenties, now, rather than a cocky teen.]
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Still getting girls to talk to me here, so it worked. Women like it when you show a little fear.
[Laughing at him is still talking to him in Lance's mind.]
sorry this took a while - rough week
it's all good. i'm a slow tagger anyway
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