Victory Road!

[video]

[The gear comes up and is aimed at an imposing figure in black armor who says nothing, merely tilts its (her) head and crosses its (her) arms.]

I fucking told you I was gonna. See, this is what you get when you do the childish cold shoulder not talking thing. I get childish right back and show everyone what a baby you're being.

[The figure doesn't move. And Church's voice gets unsettled.]

Look, haha, I get that you're mad at me for whatever, but the least you could do is threaten to punch me for that. No? Nothing? Just follow me around like a--

[He turns the gear back on himself and turns around, continues walking wherever in Goldenrod he's going. Over his shoulder, the black-clad soldier dutifully follows.] Do you see what I have to deal with? She's even worse when she decides to start talking, but the whole silent treatment thing sucks. You guys agree she's being a bitch, right? Oh, sure, don't say hi to your ex, just loom creepily. Two can totally play at this game.

( [action - Goldenrod] )

So, uh, guys. So guys! I know this is all really basic pokemon 101 stuff. Sure. Okay. These things...rapidly evolve, even though that's not at all how evolution works, and I know that without even being a nerdy biologist. But. This is allllll...pretty sudden.

So, here, here's me and the team like a week or two ago. [A selfie comes up as an attachment, his dork-ass face, serene Mareep, Voltorb cuddled into her, sleepy Stunky, Buizel doing a dorky pose, Bellsprout pretending she doesn't care, and Gastly hamming it up with a wink and his big tongue.]

Aaaand here's the team now. [He pulls back and gets out of frame--it looks like he's at the National Park now that you get to see more--to show said team with four of them having evolved.]

Y'see what I mean? This is...okay, this shit was fucked up beforehand, what with pinecones with eyes and sentient metal balls, but this is not how biology do. [Andy still manages to look angry despite the generally happier Electrode face. It is an eternal grump, and what it's grumpy about right now, other than a new round of Church bitching, is that it can no longer cuddle in Woolite's fluff. Slimer's just happy to have actual hands and eyes that fit his body! Sister...is less than thrilled. That tends to be her usual state, but still. Richard the Floatzel looks more at ease in his bigger bod, though. Still a massive fucking dork, believe him.

While they're all playing with each other, including Dexter, mostly dragged around by Richard, Church settles on a bench and leans in.]

I dunno, guys. I mean, it means they're stronger, right? They're stronger, and bigger and better. And they're still the same as they were before. Maybe they're like teenagers, or like twenty-somethings? Will they still be the same, or is their personality gonna settle down into something else? If you get a dog, the dog doesn't turn into a wolf. It stays a dog, the same dog, the same looking dog, the whole time. I'm just kind of...concerned, I guess. That I won't bond as well with my team if they've changed. What's Andy gonna do when he's pissy at me? Instead of rolling over my foot, he'll bowl me over and break some bones? Sister's gonna get a fucking complex about her figure.

Anyway biology doesn't work that way and shit is weird, what else is new. I'll be back in Goldenrod soon, now that my guys are strong enough to take the shortcut way around. I'll figure out where to go from there.